Together they would climb to the World of Bliss,
And share the same branch of the faith.
The scriptures are the way of self-cultivation,
To which the Buddha has given his own divinity.
The brothers made up a triple alliance,
With devilish powers to cope with the Five Elements.
Sweeping aside the six forms of existence,
They head for the Thunder Monastery.
As he was being dragged and carried back by the crowd of monkeys, Pig's tunic was shreds. “I'm done for,” he grumbled to himself, “done for. He'll kill me now.”
Before long he was back at the mount of the cave, where Monkey, sitting on top of a rock-face, said to him angrily, “You chaff-guzzling idiot. I let you go, so why swear at me?”
“I never did, elder brother,” said Pig on his knees, “May I bite off my tongue if ever I did. All I said was that as you weren't coming I'd have to go and tell the master. I'd never have dared to swear at you.”
“You can't fool me,” Monkey replied. “If I prick my left ear up I can hear what they're saying in the Thirty-third Heaven, and if I point my right ear down I can know what the Ten Kings of Hell and their judges are discussing. Of course I could hear you swearing at me as you walked along.”
“Now I see,” said Pig. “With that devilish head of yours you must have changed yourself into something or other to listen to what I said.”
“Little ones,” shouted Monkey, “bring some heavy rods. Give him twelve on the face, then twelve on the back. After that I'll finish him off with my iron cudgel.”
“Elder brother,” pleaded Pig, kowtowing desperately, “I beg you to spare me for our master's sake.”
“That good and kind master? Never!” said Monkey.
“If he won't do,” begged Pig, “then spare me for the Bodhisattva's sake.” The mention of the Bodhisattva made Monkey relent slightly.
“Now you've said that I won't have you flogged,” he replied. “But you must tell me straight and without lying where the Tang Priest is in trouble-which is presumably why he sent you to try and trick me.”
“He isn't in trouble,” Pig protested, “he's honestly missing you.”
“You really deserve a beating,” said Monkey, “for still trying to hood-wink me, you moron. Although I've been back in the Water Curtain Cave, I've stayed with the pilgrim in my mind. The master must have been in trouble at every step he has taken. Tell me about it at once if you don't want that flogging.”
Pig kowtowed again and said, “Yes, I did try to trick you into coming back. I didn't realize that you would see through it so easily. Please spare me a flogging and let me go, then I'll tell you.”
“Very well then,” replied Monkey, “get up and tell me.” The junior monkeys untied his hands. He leapt to his feet and began looking around wildly. “What are you looking at?” asked Monkey.
“I'm looking at that wide empty path for me to run away along,” said Pig.
“That wouldn't get you anywhere,” Monkey said. “Even if I gave you three days' start I'd still be able to catch you up. Start talking. If you make me lose my temper, that'll be the end of you.”
“I'll tell you the truth,” said Pig. “After you came back here Friar Sand and I escorted the master. When we saw a dark pine forest the master dismounted and told me to beg for some food., When I'd gone a very long way without finding anyone I was so tired that I took a snooze in the grass; I didn't realize that the master would send Friar Sand after me. You know how impatient the master is; be went off for a stroll by himself, and when he came out of the wood he saw a gleaming golden pagoda. He took it for a monastery, but an evil spirit called the Yellow-robed Monster who lived there captured him. When I and Friar Sand came back to find him, all we saw was the white horse and the baggage. The master had gone. We searched for him as far as the entrance to the cave and fought the monster. Luckily the master found someone to save him in the cave. She was the third daughter of the king of Elephantia and she'd been carried off by the monster. She gave the master a letter to deliver to her family and persuaded the ogre to let him go. When we reached the capital and delivered the letter the king asked our master to subdue the monster and bring the princess home. I ask you, brother, could the master catch a monster? We two went off to fight him, but his powers were too much for us: he captured Friar Sand and made me run away. I hid in the undergrowth. The monster turned himself into a handsome scholar and went to court, where he introduced himself to the king and turned the master into a tiger. The white horse changed himself back into a dragon in the middle of the night and went to look for the master. He didn't find him, but he did see the monster drinking in the Hall of Silvery Peace, so he turned himself into a Palace Beauty. He poured wine and did a sword dance for the ogre in the hope of finding a chance to cut him down, but the ogre wounded his hind leg with a lantern, it was the white horse who sent me here to fetch you. 'Our eldest brother is a good and honorable gentleman,' he said, 'and gentlemen don't bear grudges. He's sure to come and rescue the master.' Please, please remember that 'if a man has been your teacher for a day, you should treat him as your father for the rest of his life'. I beg you to save him.”
“Idiot,” said Monkey, “I told you over and over again before leaving that if any evil monsters captured the master you were to tell them I am his senior disciple. Why didn't you mention me?” Pig reflected that to a warrior a challenge was more effective than an invitation and said, “It would have been fine if we hadn't used your name. It was only when I mentioned you that he went wild.”
“What did you say?” asked Monkey.
“I said, 'Behave yourself, kind monster, and don't harm our master. I have an elder brother called Brother Monkey who is an expert demon-subduer with tremendous magic powers. If he comes he'll kill you, and you won't even get a funeral.' This made the ogre angrier than ever, and he said, 'I'm not scared of Monkey. If he comes here I'll skin him, tear his sinews out, gnaw his bones, and eat his heart. Although monkeys are on the skinny side, I can mince his flesh up and deep-fry it.'“ This so enraged Monkey that he leapt around in a fury, tugging at his ear and scratching his cheek.
“Did he have the gall to say that about me?” he asked.
“Calm down, brother,” said Pig. “I specially remembered all his insults so as to tell you.”
“Up you get,” said Monkey, “I didn't have to go before, but now he's insulted me I must capture him. Let's be off. When I wrecked the Heavenly Palace five hundred years ago all the generals of Heaven bowed low at the sight of me and called me 'Great Sage'. How dare that fiend have the nerve to insult me behind my back! I'm going to catch him and tear his corpse to shreds to make him pay for it. When I've done that I'll come back here.”
“Quite right,” said Pig. “When you've captured the monster and got your own back on him, it'll be up to you whether you come on with us.”
The Great Sage jumped down from the cliff, rushed into the cave, and took off all his devil clothes. He put on an embroidered tunic, tied on his tigerskin kilt, seized his iron cudgel, and came out again. His panic-stricken monkey subjects tried to stop him, saying, “Where are you going, Your Majesty, Great Sage? Wouldn't it be fun to rule us for a few more years?”
“What are you saying, little ones?” replied Monkey. “I have to protect the Tang Priest. Everyone in Heaven and Earth knows that I am the Tang Priest's disciple. He didn't really drive me away. He just wanted me to take a trip home and have a little relaxation. Now I've got to attend to this. You must all take good care of our household. Plant willow and pine cuttings at the right season, and don't let things go to pieces. I must escort the Tang Priest while he fetches the scriptures and returns to the East. When my mission is over I'll come back to this happy life with you here.” The monkeys all accepted his orders.