“In that case you must all be lofty monks who obey your vows,” the elders said. “But even if you won't accept money we can't let you work for nothing. We all live by agriculture. If you subdue the demon and clean the place up, every family here will give you a third of an acre of good farmland, which will make over 150 acres altogether. Your master and you disciples can build a monastery there and sit in meditation. That would be much better than going on your long journey.”
“It would be even worse,” replied brother Monkey with a smile. “If we asked for land we'd have to raise horses, do labor service, pay grain taxes and hand over hay. We'll never be able to go to bed at dusk or lie in after the fifth watch. It'd be the death of us.”
“If you won't accept anything, how are we to express our thanks?” the elders asked.
“We're men of religion,” said Monkey. “Some tea and a meal will be thanks enough for us.”
“That's easy,” said the elders. “But how are you going to catch the demon?”
“Once it comes I'll get it,” said Monkey.
“But it's enormous,” the elders said. “It stretches from the earth to the sky. It comes in wind and goes in mist. How are you ever going to get close to it?”
“When it comes to evil spirits who can summon winds and ride on clouds,” Monkey replied, “I treat them as mere kids. It makes no difference how big it is-I have ways of beating it.”
As they were talking the howl of a great wind made the eight or nine elders start shaking with fear. “Monk, you've asked for trouble and you've got it,” they said. “You talked about the monster and here he is.”
Old Mr. Li opened the door and said to his relations and the Tang Priest, “Come in, come in, the demon's here.”
This so alarmed Pig and Friar Sand that they wanted to go inside too, but Monkey grabbed each of them with one of his hands and said, “You're a disgrace. You're monks and you ought to know better. Stay where you are, and don't try to run away. Come into the courtyard with me. We're going to see what kind of evil spirit this is.”
“But brother,” said Pig, “they've been through this before. The noise of the wind means that the demon's coming. They've all gone to hide. We're not friends or relations of the demon. We've had no business dealings with him. What do we want to see him for?” Monkey was so strong that with no further argument he hauled them into the courtyard and made them stand there while the wind blew louder and louder. It was a splendid wind that
Uprooted trees and flattened woods, alarming wolves and tigers,
Stirred up the rivers and oceans to the horror of ghosts and gods,
Blowing the triple peaks of the great Mount Hua all upside down,
Shaking the earth and sky through the world's four continents.
Every village family shut fast its gates,
While boys and girls all fled for cover.
Black clouds blotted out the Milky Way;
Lamps lost their brightness and the world went dark.
Pig was shaking with terror. He lay on the ground, rooted into the earth with his snout and buried his head. He looked as if he had been nailed there. Friar Sand covered his face and could not keep his eyes open. Monkey knew from the sound of the wind that the demon was in it. A moment later, when the wind had passed, all that could be vaguely made out in the sky were two lamps.
“Brothers,” he said, looking down, “the wind's finished. Get up and look.” The idiot tugged his snout out, brushed the dirt off himself and looked up into the sky, where he saw the two lamps.
“What a laugh,” Pig said, laughing aloud, “What a laugh. It's an evil spirit with good manners. Let's make friends with it.”
“It's a very dark night,” said Friar Sand, “and you haven't even seen it, so how can you tell whether it's good or bad?”
“As they used to say in the old days,” Pig replied, “'Take a candle when you're out at night, and stay where you are if you haven't one.' You can see that it's got a pair of lanterns to light its way. It must be a good spirit.”
“You're wrong,” Friar Sand said. “That's not a pair of lanterns: they're the demon's eyes.” This gave the idiot such a fright that he shrank three inches.
“Heavens,” he said. “If its eyes are that size goodness knows how big its mouth is.”
“Don't be scared, brother,” said Monkey. “You two guard the master while I go up and see what sort of mood it's in and what kind of evil spirit it is.”
“Brother,” said Pig, “don't tell the monster about us.”
Splendid Monkey sprang up into mid-air with a whistle. “Not so fast,” he yelled at the top of his voice, brandishing his cudgel, “not so fast. I'm here.” When the monster saw him it took a firm stance and began to wield a long spear furiously.
Parrying with his cudgel, Monkey asked, “What part do you come from, monster? Where are you an evil spirit?” The monster ignored the questions and continued with its spearplay. Monkey asked again, and again there was no answer as the wild spearplay continued.
“So it's deaf and dumb,” Monkey smiled to himself. “Don't run away! Take this!” Unperturbed, the monster parried the cudgel with more wild spearplay. The mid-air battle ebbed and flowed until the middle of the night as first one then the other was on top, but still there was no victor. Pig and Friar Sand had a very clear view from the Li family courtyard, and they could see that the demon was only using its spear to defend itself and not making any attacks, while Monkey's cudgel was never far from the demon's head.
“Friar Sand,” said Pig with a grin, “you keep guard here. I'm going up to join in the fight. I'm not going to let Monkey keep all the credit for beating the monster to himself. He won't be the first to be given a drink.”
The splendid idiot leapt up on his cloud and joined in the fight, taking a swing with his rake. The monster fended this off with another spear. The two spears were like flying snakes or flashes of lightning. Pig was full of admiration.
“This evil spirit is a real expert with the spears. This isn't 'behind the mountain' spearplay; it's 'tangled thread' spearplay. It's not Ma Family style. It's what's called soft-shaft style.”
“Don't talk such nonsense, idiot,” said Monkey. “There's no such thing as soft-shaft style.”
“Just look,” Pig replied. “He's parrying us with the blades. You can't see the shafts. I don't know where he's hiding them.”
“All right then,” said Monkey, “perhaps there is a soft-shaft style. But this monster can't talk. I suppose it's not yet humanized: it's still got a lot of the negative about it. Tomorrow morning, when the positive is dominant, it's bound to run away. When it does we've got to catch up with it and not let it go.”
“Yes, yes,” said Pig.
When the fight had gone on for a long time the East grew light. The monster didn't dare fight any longer, so it turned and fled, with Monkey and Pig both after it. Suddenly they smelled the putrid and overwhelming stench of Runny Persimmon Lane on Mount Seven Perfections.
“Some family must be emptying its cesspit,” said Pig. “Phew! What a horrible stink!”
Holding his nose, Brother Monkey said, “After the demon, after the demon!” The monster went over the mountain and turned back into himself: a giant red-scaled python. Just look at it:
Eyes shooting stars,
Nostrils gushing clouds,
Teeth like close-set blades of steel,
Curving claws like golden hooks.
On its head a horn of flesh
Like a thousand pieces of agate;
Its body clad in scales of red
Like countless patches of rouge.