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“Don't worry,” Pig replied, “don't worry. We're being treated as his in-laws, so it would be very awkward for him to get angry with us. As the proverb goes,

If you're related a beating can't rend it;

If you are neighbors a cursing won't end it.

We were only joking. He's nothing to be frightened of.”

At this the venerable elder shouted, “Bring the idiot here. Give him twenty strokes of the dhyana staff.” Monkey then grabbed Pig and knocked him over, while Sanzang raised the cudgel to beat him.

“Master, Royal Son-in-law,” the idiot shouted, “Spare me! Spare me!”

One of the officials who was present at the banquet persuaded Sanzang not to hit Pig, who clambered back on his feet, grumbling, “You're a fine excellency; you're a fine royal son-in-law. Applying the royal law before you're even married!”

“Stop that nonsense,” said Monkey, making a face at him, “stop that nonsense! Go to bed at once.” They then spent another night in the Lingering Spring Pavilion. The next morning they feasted as before.

Before long they had been enjoying themselves for three or four days, by when it was that splendid day, the twelfth. The officials of the three sections of the Department of Foreign Relations all submitted a memorial that said, “Since we received the edicts on the eighth the palace for the Royal Son-in-law has been built, and all that we are waiting for is for the trousseau to be installed. The nuptial banquet has been prepared, with meat and vegetarian food for over five hundred guests.”

This greatly pleased the king, who was just going to invite his future son-in-law to come to the banquet when a eunuch from the inner quarters of the palace reported to him, “Your Majesty, Her Majesty the Queen asks you to come.” The king then withdrew to the inner quarters of the palace, where the queens of the three palaces and the consorts of the six compounds brought the princess to the Sunlight Palace to talk and joke together. The place was truly a mass of flowers or brocade. The magnificence and beauty was more than a match for the halls of heaven or the moon's pavilions; nor was it inferior to the jade palaces of immortals.

There are four new lyrics on the “Happy Gathering and Splendid Wedding” about it. The lyric “Happy” goes:

Happy! Happy!

Delight and bliss!

The wedding is celebrated

With its love and beauty.

Elegant court dresses

That the Lady of the Moon could never rival;

Dragon and phoenix hairpins,

Sumptuous threads of flying gold.

Cherry lips, white teeth and rouge-red cheeks

Sylphs with forms as delicate as flowers.

Brocades upon brocades,

An extravagance of color,

Full of fragrance,

A host of princesses.

The lyric “Gathering” goes:

Gathering! Gathering!

Bewitching charms,

Rivaling the great beauties of the past,

Enough to topple a city or a state,

Like flowers or jade.

Dressed to make them lovelier still,

Even more dazzling in their finery,

And the splendor of their jewels.

Their orchid hearts and natures were pure and lofty;

Noble were their powder-white faces and ice-smooth skin.

The lines of their painted eyebrows were like distant hills;

They formed a throng of willowy elegance.

The lyric “Splendid” goes:

Splendid! Splendid!

Jade girls, fairy maidens,

Utterly adorable,

Truly to be admired,

Perfumed with fine fragrances,

Adorned with cosmetics.

Although far from the Tiantai paradise,

This was no mere palace of a king.

Sweet were their smiling words

As the sound of pipes and songs was wafted around.

A thousand beauties, massed flowers, a splendid brocade:

How could its match be found in the world?

The lyric “Wedding” goes:

Wedding! Wedding!

Orchid Fragrance,

Ranks of fairy girls,

Crowds of beauties.

The royal concubines have put on new splendor;

The princesses are in fresh garments.

Piled clouds of raven hair,

Rainbow gowns over phoenix skirts.

Soft music of immortals,

Two rows of purple and red.

In the past they pledged to ride in one phoenix chariot;

This morning is the happy occasion and the splendid wedding.

When the king arrived his queens and consorts led the princess and the other palace ladies out to meet him. The delighted king took them into the Sunlight Palace to sit down. When the queens, consorts and others had made their obeisances the king said, “Princess, my good daughter, we think that your heart's desire was fulfilled when you had the good fortune to find the holy monk by throwing your ball from the decorated tower on the eighth. The officials of all the departments have been most understanding of our wishes, so that everything is now ready. As today is a lucky one let us hurry to the nuptial banquet and not be late.”

The princess stepped forward, went down in a kowtow, and submitted this petition: “Your Majesty my father, I beg you to forgive your daughter for her effrontery, but I have a request to make. In the last few days it has been reported in the inner quarters of the palace that the Tang Priest has three extremely hideous disciples. I couldn't bring myself to see them: I'm afraid the sight would terrify me. So I beg you, Father, to send them out of the city. Otherwise the shock might be too much for my trail health and lead to disaster.”

“If you had not mentioned them, child,” the king replied, “we would have very nearly forgotten about them. They are indeed rather ugly, and for the last few days we have had them entertained in the Lingering Spring Pavilion. When we go into the throne hall this morning we will return their passport and tell them to leave the city so that we can hold our banquet.” The princess then kowtowed again in thanks, after which the king left in his carriage to enter the throne hall and issue a decree inviting his son-in-law and the other three gentlemen to attend.

Now the Tang Priest had been following the dates by counting on his fingers, so when he reached the twelfth he had a discussion with his three disciples before dawn. “It is the twelfth today,” he said. “How are we to cope?”

“I've already noticed something of an ill-omened air about the king,” Brother Monkey replied, “but the evil hasn't actually infected him or done any great harm. The only thing is that I've not yet had a look at the princess. If she comes out and lets me take a peep at her I'll know whether she's an impostor or not, then I'll do something. Don't worry. He's bound to summon us now and send us three away from the city. Accept the invitation and don't be afraid. I'll slip back and stay close to you to protect you.” As master and disciples were talking a royal equerry did indeed come with officials from the protocol office to bring an invitation.

“Let's go,” said Monkey, “let's go. I'm sure they're going to see us three on our way and keep you here, Master, for the wedding.”

“If they're seeing us off they're bound to give us hundreds and thousands of ounces of gold and silver,” said Pig. “We'll be able to buy some presents to take home with us. When I get back to my in-laws' place I'll be able to have a bit of fun again.”

“Shut up, second brother,” said Friar Sand, “and stop talking such nonsense. We'll do what big brother says.”

They then followed the officials to the foot of the throne hall steps, taking baggage and horse with them. When the king had greeted them he commanded Monkey and the other two to come forward. “Hand your passport up,” he said, “and we shall seal it, sign it and return it to you. You three gentlemen will be generously provided with funds for your journey and escorted on your way to see the Buddha on Vulture Peak. If you come back with the scriptures you will also receive generous rewards. We shall keep our son-in-law here: there will be no need for you to worry about him.”