***
The cafeteria always reminded me of an asylum, neutral to the extreme so as to not incite the inmates, which surely splashes of color would do. Walls were painted in a one-dimensional beige color, and the floors were black-speckled white tiles like you see in most hospitals. Rows of those heavy-duty plastic tables with the built-in benches finished the painstakingly sane decor. I pushed my salad around my plate and half-listened to Poppy tell her story about the European vacation she and her parents, a surgeon and a lawyer, had taken.
Poppy's family lived in the biggest house I'd ever seen with award-winning gardens, fancy cars, and all the trimmings. Even for all of their wealth, they were really nice people and they had brought me into their fold from the time I was nine years old. I loved the Wrights. They were the closest to family that I'd ever known. I'd often thought how lucky I was to have Poppy as my bestie, because she could have been a “popular”, she certainly fit the criteria, but she saw them as I did: self-absorbed and boring.
I had been invited to join Poppy and her family on their trip to Europe, but I couldn't go. I needed to work so I could put money away for college just in case I didn't get the academic scholarships I was trying for. My uncle's salary disqualified me from financial-aid scholarships and grants and I had no intention of asking my aunt for a dime, stupid and nearsighted maybe, but I had pride and would rather be damned than be indebted to her for anything.
A mild commotion heralded Sebastian’s entrance to the cafeteria with Kira—light and dark together. I felt it again—the bitterness that left an unpleasant taste in my mouth. My eyes tracked him as he walked through the line and paid before following Kira to the popular table. He didn't belong at that table, and why I felt that way when I didn't know him at all, I couldn't say. They were all so superficial and shallow and he…I don't know, when I looked into those eyes earlier, I saw a hell of a lot looking back.
“Lark!”
I pulled my focus from Sebastian to look over at Poppy. “What?”
“You were drooling.”
“No, not drooling, just looking.”
Poppy's blue eyes peered over at Sebastian. “He is something else. You interested?”
“Wouldn't matter even if I was.”
She looked genuinely confused. “Why?”
My exhale sounded more like a sigh. “Look at him and then look at me. You do the math.”
“What does that mean? Yeah, I wish you wouldn't wear black all the time, but you're beautiful.”
Leaning over the table, I looked, really looked, into Poppy's eyes to see if she was tripping. She didn't do drugs, as far as I knew, but she sure as hell was acting like she was on something. I was not beautiful. I would say attractive, maybe even exotic because of the bright green color of my eyes, but I was definitely not cheerleader-caliber-beautiful.
“Are you high?”
“You really need to get a grip on reality. Trevor thinks you're gorgeous.”
Trevor was Poppy's cousin—her wildly attractive, college freshman cousin—whom I’d had a crush on since I was ten. Recently, my feelings for him cooled from adoration to affection as our relationship morphed into that of family, but I couldn't deny I liked hearing he thought of me as pretty.
“You lie.”
Poppy turned to Shawn. “Tell her.”
Shawn held my gaze and humor danced in his eyes. “He does, Lark.”
Goosebumps prickled my skin as I tucked that lovely little tidbit away with all the other happy moments I wanted to remember always. There weren't many, but the ones I had were definitely keepers. I didn't respond with words, only a contented smile, but Poppy was still on her warpath.
“So again, why would it be so unreasonable for you and him...” she gestured with her head to Sebastian “to get together.”
“He's with the Cheers.”
“Well, yes, that does show an abominable lack of sense, but he is new. Maybe he just needs someone else to take him under their wing.” She said this as she wiggled her eyebrows.
“You're ridiculous.”
“No, I've just never seen your eyes sparkle like they're doing now and I've known you for a really long time.”
She might be like a dog with a bone, but she really was the bestest friend a person could have. I reached across the table and squeezed her hand. “Thank you.”
She gave me a moment and then she asked, “So are we a go for operation “Win Sebastian?”
“No!”
“Well, you let me know when you're ready.”
“That's easy, I can answer that now, never.”
She said nothing, but I didn't miss the calculating look in her eyes. That was all I needed, for Poppy to have a mission and one that revolved around me. I resisted the urge to bang my head on the table. This was going to be a very long year.
***
On my way to art class for my free period, I noticed a cluster of boys farther down the hall. They were talking, leaning up against the lockers engaged in whatever it was boys talked about. When my eyes collided with Sebastian, I was surprised to see him in the mix or rather surprised at the ease in which he mingled with the others. He was new to school and yet to look at him, you'd think he had spent the past three years with these guys.
In English earlier, my reaction to Sebastian had been out of character but I had chalked that up as embarrassment because I had been acting like a bit of a goof. The same could not be said of now, since Sebastian wasn't even looking in my direction, and yet my heart fluttered. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling, quite the opposite, but physically reacting to a boy was definitely unusual for me. Nervousness filled me as I passed by the guys, or maybe it was self-consciousness. I didn't mean to look, I really didn't, but I felt his gaze on me and seeing those turquoise eyes staring so intently, turned the fluttering into a nearly painful thumping. There was no grin on his face; in fact he looked at me as if he was trying to figure me out. Pins and needles were shooting down my arms and my hands grew so damp, I feared my notebook might just slip from my grasp. I honestly didn't understand what I was feeling but I had to say, I really liked feeling it.
It was hard to pull my gaze from his but I managed it and as I continued down the hall, somehow I knew those eyes were still watching me.
***
After school, Poppy offered me a ride home but I could tell that Shawn was hoping to get Poppy alone, so I claimed I needed to stay late to chat with my art teacher, Ms. Whitney. Stepping outside, the bright afternoon sun blinded me, causing me to miss the small congregation that had formed in the parking lot. It only took a moment for understanding to dawn. I had been wrong. There wasn't a line of girls at Sebastian's locker; they instead were surrounding his bike. I wondered if his starry-eyed admirers were holding him captive. Though, from where I stood, he didn't appear to be in distress. And then my brain took a detour, as it had a tendency to do, and I envisioned rescuing him: the damsel saving the knight for a change. The idea was so comical, I nearly laughed out loud, again.
Since he was surrounded, literally, I blatantly stared. Resting up against his bike, his feet crossed at the ankles, he looked sexy. And though he wasn't grinning like he had in class, there was something about his expression that was very appealing. Maybe it was simply that he looked really comfortable in his own skin. I couldn't deny I was fascinated with him but clearly I wasn't the only one. And on the cusp of that observation, an unfamiliar and equally unpleasant feeling twisted in my gut but I had no desire to analyze it. What would be the point?
Just when I was about to turn my attention away from Sebastian and his horde, his head lifted and those eyes speared me from across the parking lot. I hadn't a clue what he was thinking, but the intensity of his focus turned the unpleasant feeling in my gut to a very pleasant one. Several in his fan club twisted their necks to see what had gained his attention. Having never been fond of the spotlight, I lowered my head and moved it along but I couldn't help the grin that curved my lips or the tingles that swept through my entire body.