“Very well. You can have your resignation on my desk by the end of your shift.”
“Screw that. This is my resignation.” She took a deep breath. “Im smarter than you are, and Im younger, stronger, and better-looking. The regular patrons know and like me— most of them dont know you, and the ones whove gotten to know you dont like you. Those are some of the reasons youve been on my ass since you took over. Im out of here, Joan, but Im walking out of my own accord. I lay odds that youll be on your way out before much longer, too—only youll be booted out by the board.”
“If you expect any sort of reference or referral—”
Dana stopped at the door. “Joan, Joan, do you want to end our relationship with me telling you what you can do with your reference?”
Her anger carried her straight down to the employee lounge, where she gathered her jacket and a handful of personal belongings. She didnt stop to speak to any of her coworkers. If she didnt get out, and get out fast, she feared she would either burst into hysterical sobs or punch her fist through the wall.
Either option would give Joan too much power.
So she walked out without a backward glance. And kept walking. She refused to let herself think that this was the last time she would make this trip from work to home. ,It wasnt the end of her life; it was just a corner turned.
When she felt the angry tears stinging her eyes, she dug out her sunglasses. She wasnt about to humiliate herself by crying on the damn sidewalk.
But her breath was hitching by the time she reached her apartment door. She fumbled out her keys, stumbled inside, then simply sank down on the floor.
“Oh, God, oh, God, what have I done?”
Shed cut her ties. She had no job. And it would be weeks before she could reasonably open the bookstore. And why did she think she could run a bookstore? Knowing and loving books didnt make her a merchant. Shed never worked in retail in her life, and suddenly she was going to run a retail business?
Shed thought she was prepared for the step. Now, faced with stark reality, Dana realized she wasnt even close to prepared.
Panicked, she leaped up, all but fell onto the phone. “Zoe?Zoe … I just—Ive got to… Christ. Can you meet me at the place, the house?”
“Okay. Dana, whats wrong? Whats the matter?” “I just—I quit my job. I think Im having an anxiety attack. I need… Can you get the keys? Can you get Malory and meet me there?”
“All right, honey. Take a deep breath. Come on, suck one in. Breathe easy. Thats it. Twenty minutes. Well be there in twenty minutes.”
“Thanks. Okay, thanks.Zoe —”
“You just keep breathing. Want me to swing by and get you?”
“No.” She rubbed the temper tears away. “No, Ill meet you.”
“Twenty minutes,”Zoe repeated and rang off.
* * *
SHE was calmer, at least on the surface, when she pulled into the double drive in front of the pretty frame house shed bought with her friends. In a matter of weeks, theyd be signing papers at settlement. Then they would begin, well, whatever it was that they were going to begin.
It wasZoe and Malory who had the big ideas as far as ambience, color schemes, paints, and posies. Theyd already had their heads together over paint chips for the color of the porch, the entrance hall. And she knewZoe had been scouring flea markets and yard sales for the trash that she miraculously turned into treasure.
It wasnt that she didnt have ideas herself. She did.
She could envision in general how her section of the main floor would look when it had been transformed into a little bookstore/cafe. Comfortable and cozy. Maybe some good sink-into-me chairs, a few tables.
But she couldnt see the details. What should the chairs look like? What kind of tables should she use?
And there were dozens of other things she hadnt considered when shed jumped into that dream of having her own bookstore. Just as, she was forced to admit, there were things she hadnt considered when shed, basically, told Joan to stuff it.
Impulse, pride, and temper, she thought with a sigh. A dangerous combination. Now she was going to have to live with the results of surrendering to it.
She stepped but of the car. Her stomach was still jumpy, so she rubbed a hand over it as she studied the house.
It was a good place. It was important to remember that. Shed liked it the minute shed stepped inside the door withZoe . Even the downright terrifying experience theyd had inside it— courtesy of their nemesis, Kane—barely a week before, when Malory had found her key, didnt spoil the feel of the place.
Shed never owned a house, or any other property. She should concentrate on the very adult sensation of owning a third of an actual building, and the land it stood on. She wasnt afraid of the responsibility—it was good to know that. She wasnt afraid of work, mental or physical.
But she was, she realized, very afraid of failing.
She walked to the porch, sat on the step, and indulged in a good wallow.
She was too mired in it to do more than sit there when Malory pulled up withZoe in the passenger seat. Malory angled her head as she climbed out.
“Crappy day, huh?”
“Dont come much crappier. Thanks for coming. Really.”
“We did better than that.” She gestured towardZoe , and the white bakery boxZoe carried.
Overcome, Dana sniffed. “Is it chocolate?”
“Were girls, arent we?” Sitting beside her,Zoe gave her a hard, one-armed hug, then opened the box. “Chocolate . A big fat one for each of us.”
This time, it was sentimental tears threatening to fall. “You guys are the best.”
“Take a few bites, wait for the kick, then tell us about it.“ Malory sat on the other side, handed out napkins.
Dana soothed herself with chocolate, pastry, and cream, and-the story tumbled out between bites.
“She wanted me to quit.” Scowling, she flicked her tongue at the corner of her mouth and licked off a bit of Bavarian cream. “It was some visceral animosity going on between us the minute we laid eyes on each other. Like, Idunno , maybe we were mortal enemies in a past life. Or, Jesus, married or something. Its not just that she ran the library like it was boot camp—thats bad enough—but she had it in for me, personally. And so did her little yappy dog, Sandi.”
“I know its tough, Dana. Boy, do I.” Malory rubbed a sympathetic hand over Danas shoulder. “But you were planning to resign in a few weeks anyway.”
“I know, I know. But I wanted to sort of ease out. Cop the little going-away party with the staff, so it all ended on a high note. And the fact is, even with the pay cut, the salary did come in handy. More than. I couldve used the extra paychecks before I walked.”
“Telling her to cram it should be worth the paychecks. Shes a bitch and we hate her,”Zoe said loyally. “And when Indulgence is up and running, and the bookstores the talk of the Valley, shell stew in her own envious juices.”
Considering, Dana pursed her lips. “Thats a good one. I just panicked, I guess. Ive always worked in a library. High school library, college library, then this one. And it suddenly hit me that thats done, and Im going to be the owner of a retail business.”
She rubbed her damp hands on her knees. “I dont even know how to work a cash register.”
“Ill teach you,”Zoe promised. “Were in this together.”
“I dont want to mess it up. I dont want to mess up the key deal either. Its just that all this hit me at once.”
Malory offered Dana the last third of her 6clair. “Have a little more sugar. Then well go in and start making some serious plans.”
“Ive got two hours before I have to be home,”Zoe told her. “When we picked up the keys, I asked the real estate agent. She said we could start on some of the basic cosmetic work if we want to risk the time and money. We could paint the porch, say, unless were worried the deal wont go through.”