"I meant about the girl in your room!"
"That's the other thing I wanted to ..."
"Cut him some slack! Huh, Tananda? It's uncivilized to beat up on someone before breakfast."
That was Aahz, who for once had approached our gathering without being seen ... or heard. He's usually not big on quiet entrances.
For that matter, I had never known him to be at all reluctant about beating up on someone-say, for example, me-before breakfast. Still, I was grateful for his intervention.
"Hi, Aahz. We were just..."
"Do you know what your partner is doing!?" Tananda said in a voice that could freeze wine. "He seems to be turning our home into a combination daycare center and..."
"I know all about it," Aahz interrupted, "and so will you if you'll just cool down. We'll explain everything over breakfast."
"Well. .."
"Besides," Markie piped up, "It's not your home. It's my daddy's. He just lets you live here. He can do anything he wants in his house!"
I released my hold on her, hoping to dump her on her head. Instead she twisted in midair and landed on her feet like a cat, all the while sneering smugly.
Tananda had stiffened as if someone had jabbed her with a pin.
"I suppose you're right, Markie," she said through tight lips. "If the ‘Great Skeeve' wants to romp with some bit of fluff, it's none of my business. And if I don't like it, I should just go elsewhere."
She spun on her heel and started off down the hall.
"What about breakfast?" Aahz called after her.
"I'll be eating out... permanently!"
We watched her departure in helpless silence.
"I'd better go after her," Chumley said at last. "In the mood she's in, she might hurt someone."
"Could you take Markie with you?" Aahz requested, still staring after Tananda.
"Are you kidding?" the troll gaped.
"Well, at least drop her off in the kitchen. I've got to have a few words with Skeeve in private."
"I want to stay here!" Markie protested.
"Go," I said quietly.
There must have been something in my voice, because both Markie and Chumley headed off without further argument.
"Partner, you've got a problem."
"Don't I know it. If there was any way I could ship her back to Don Bruce, I'd do it in a minute, but..."
"I'm not talking about Bunny!"
That stopped me.
"You aren't?"
"No. Markie's the problem, not Bunny."
"Markie? But she's just a little girl."
Aahz heaved a small sign and put one hand on my shoulder ... gently, for a change.
"Skeeve, I've given you a lot of advice in the past, some of it better than others. For the most part, you've done pretty well at winging it in unfamiliar situations, but this time you're in over your head. Believe me, you don't have the vaguest idea of the kind of havoc a kid can cause in your life ... especially a little girl."
I didn't know what to say. My partner was obviously sincere in his concern, and for a change expressing it in a very calm, low-key manner. Still, I couldn't go along with what he was saying.
"C'mon, Aahz. How much trouble can she be? This thing with Tananda happened because of Bunny..."
"... after Markie started mouthing off at the wrong time. I already had Tananda cooling off when Markie put her two cents in."
It also occurred to me that Markie was the one who had spilled the beans to Tananda in the first place. I shoved that thought to the back of my mind.
"So she doesn't have enough sense to keep her mouth shut. She's just a kid. We can't expect her to ..."
"That's my point. Think about our operation for a minute, partner. How many times in one day can things go sour if someone says the wrong thing at the right moment? It's taken us a year to get Guido and Nunzio on board... and they're adults. Bringing a kid into the place is like waving a torch around a fireworks factory."
As much as I appreciated his efforts to explain a problem to me, I was starting to weary a bit of Aahz's single-minded pursuit of his point.
"Okay. So I haven't had much experience around kids. I may be underestimating the situation, but aren't you being a bit of an alarmist? What experience are you basing your worries on?"
"Are you kidding?" my partner said, laughing for the first time in our conversation. "Anyone who's been around as many centuries as I have has had more than their share of experience with kids. You met my nephew Rupert? You think he was born an adult? And he's only one of more nieces, nephews, and grandchildren than I can count without being reduced to a nervous wreck by the memories."
And I though I couldn't be surprised by Aahz any more.
"Really? Grandchildren? I never even knew you had kids."
"I don't like to talk about it. That in itself should be a clue. When someone who likes to talk as much as I do totally avoids a subject, the memories have got to be less than pleasant!"
I was starting to get a bit worried. Realizing that Aahz usually tends to minimize danger, his warnings were starting to set my overactive imagination in gear.
"I hear what you're saying, Aahz. But we're only talking about one kid here. How much trouble can one little girl be?"
My partner's face suddenly split into one of his infamous evil grins. "Remember that quote," he said. "I'm going to be tossing it back at you from time to time."
"But..."
"Hey, Boss! There's someone here to see you!"
Just what I needed! I had already pretty much resolved not to take on any more clients until after Markie's father had reclaimed her. Of course, I didn't want to say that in front of Aahz, especially considering our current conversation.
"I'm in the middle of a conference, Guido!" I called. "Tell them to come back later."
"Suit yourself, Boss!" came the reply. "I just thought you'd want to know, seein' as how it's Luanna..."
I was off like a shot, not even bothering to excuse myself. Aahz would understand. He knew I'd had a thing for Luanna since our expedition into Limbo.
On my way to the waiting room, I had time to speculate as to whether or not this was one of my bodyguard's little pranks. I decided that if it was, I would study hard until I knew enough magic to turn him into a toad.
My suspicions were groundless. She was there. My beautiful blond goddess. What really made my heart leap, though, was that she had her luggage with her.
"Hi, Luanna. What are you doing here? Where's Matt? How have things been? Would you like something to drink? Could I..."
I suddenly realized that I was babbling and forced myself to pause.
"Aahh... what I'm trying to say is that it's good to see you."
That got me the slow smile that had haunted my dreams. "I'm glad, Skeeve. I was afraid you'd forgotten about me."
"Not a chance," I said, then realized I was leering. "That is, no, I haven't forgotten about you."
Her deep blue eyes locked with mine, and I felt myself sinking helplessly into their depths.
"That's good," she said in that musical voice of hers. "I was worried about taking you up on your offer after all this time."
That got through the fog that was threatening to envelop my mind. "Offer? What offer?"
"Oh, you don't remember! I thought... oh, this is embarrassing."
"Wait a minute!" I cried. "I haven't forgotten! It's just that... let me think ... it's just..."
Like a beam of sunlight in a swamp the memory came to me. "You mean when I said that you could come to work for Aahz and me? That's it? Right?"
"That's what I was talking about!" The sun came from behind the clouds as she smiled again. "You see, Matt and I have split, and I thought..."
"Do you want any breakfast. Daddy? You said... oh! Hello."
"DADDY!!??"
Markie and Luanna stared at each other.
I revised my plans rapidly. I would study hard and turn myself into a toad.