“I know and I’m counting on it.”
“Do you seek to change your position with me?”
Verden shook his head. “My word remains unbroken. I will not break it to suit your purpose.”
“So you have said before and yet here you are, speaking freely, keeping my secrets as I keep yours. So I ask you plainly: if we weren’t at cross-purpose, would you act on my behalf?”
Verden was silent for a moment. If he’d answered too fast, Felan would have doubted his sincerity. Here was a man weighing his future and trying to find a clear path to the one thing he wanted. Taryn. Felan wasn’t enough of a bastard to use that against him. He wanted that, that moment where nothing held value except love. “I would.”
“Very well. When the time comes, I will ask for your aid and you will provide it. In return, I will keep your loyalty in mind when reforming the Court.”
“Thank you, Prince.” Verden looked at him. “But I may not remain at Court come spring.”
“Ah.” Felan nodded. It was sometimes what wasn’t said that meant more. Verden was done with Court. The only reason he was here now was to try and keep Taryn away from Gwyn. Come spring, he was planning a life with her. Felan wanted to tell Verden the truth about his father and that it was all for show, but it didn’t matter whether it was real or not, as the result was the same. Verden couldn’t be with Taryn while the King still held her hand.
“I have business that takes me to the fringes tonight. Will you attend her?”
Felan looked at Verden. He looked worn, troubled, and heartsick—he knew because he’d looked that way seven years ago. It gave him hope. He wouldn’t make his parents’ mistake. He wanted love. He’d had it once and had walked away. This time he would fight. And win. He couldn’t fail.
“I will watch over her.” It was the best he could do.
Verden turned away, his fingers wound in the horse’s mane as if he were preparing to leave.
“If you knew who plotted against me, you’d tell me?”
The Hunter swung himself onto the horse. “If I knew, I would. I swore to Gwyn, but I intend to swear to you and no one else come spring. Claim your bride, claim the throne, and I shall be kneeling at the front.”
“One thing at a time.”
“I don’t envy you. Humans are a strange bunch.”
Felan laughed. “That they are, but I am happy with my fate. I hope yours works out the way you’ve planned.”
Verden gave a single nod and turned the horse. Felan watched him ride away. Happy wasn’t the right word. He wanted happy.
The horse galloped over the grass, following the river that divided Annwyn from the Elysian Fields. Occasionally, through the mist on the other side, Verden glimpsed shapes, but for the most part it was hidden. Not even fairies knew what happened on the other side. After he’d put some distance between him and the castle, he let the horse slow. He was past the hamlets that clustered near the edges and supplied the castle with clothes and shoes, and into the forest. His horse picked a path along the trails made by deer and horse. Last time he’d come this way, he’d been on foot and it had taken several days of travel.
He’d never been home since.
I didn’t have time
That was the excuse he’d told himself, but the truth was he didn’t know how to face the parents who warned him not to go, begged him not to leave. Had taken him across the veil to try and convince him that the mortal world was better than Court, but he’d gotten it into his head that he wanted to be someone of standing, not just a farmer’s son, and had gone.
The only thing in his head this morning was a dull ache that was echoed in his heart. Temporary. But what if her feelings changed? Temporary. What if his feelings changed? Temporary. He wanted to ride back to Court, kidnap her, and take her with him.
He needed the night away or he might change his mind and take her across the veil. This would be easier if he didn’t have to see her at all. Tomorrow night was the dance and they had other partners, so it would be easy to avoid her. Who was he fooling? Not himself.
She was lodged under his skin and he didn’t want to pull out the splinter no matter how much pain it caused him. It reminded him why he was doing this. As Felan had said, come spring, things will be different. All he and Taryn had to do was wait out the change in season.
And then he would have to decide if he wanted to remain at Court. He hadn’t lied; Taryn wasn’t a Court fairy, but he didn’t know if he was cut out to be a Brownie, the highest ranked fairy in the mortal world, or just a drifter, a fairy that flitted between worlds and made a real life in neither.
He was going home to see if this third option was viable, as well as to see his parents—if they still lived. A new ache formed. He shouldn’t have left it so long. What if they had died? He might be loyal to Gwyn, but he was a poor son. His father had deserved better.
Taryn was doing everything she could to save her father. Her loyalty and love for her family came first, while he’d thrown it away like a pair of old shoes. He’d sold himself to the highest bidder and not looked back. Now he’d let her go. What kind of man was he?
He had to let her go so she could get the pardon. Her family came first. While she did that, this was his chance to make amends with his family.
The doubt increased the closer he got. What if his parents weren’t there, or if they wouldn’t see him? He wanted to see them before winter. He wanted them to know he’d done well and brought honor to the family. He wanted them to know things were in flux. He wanted to know how his father had known to marry his mother. How they knew it was the right thing to do. It had been a long time since he’d done the right thing instead of the expected thing—and the two were quite often very different.
How did he tell love from the thrill of the chase and the lure of the forbidden? He’d meant it when the words had slipped past his lips. But had it been the whiskey?
The sky was deepening to purple when the forest thinned and the small farmhouses came into sight. Spread out along the hills, some were grander than others, but this was where the milk came from for the cheeses and cakes; the honey was gathered from the hives at the edges of the forest. The berries for wine would be farmed to his right, just over the rise. If he climbed the hill, he’d be high enough to see a curve in the river.
That was something most never realized. He had simply from riding and observing. Annwyn was an island. Around it was the river of damned and on the other side the Elysian Fields. Annwyn was a dot. A tiny portal through which souls passed. Without the fairies colonizing it and drawing on the power and stabilizing the river, the human population would have never expanded and progressed the way it had. Fairies had given humans the space to flourish without death bleeding through and stalking them at every turn.
For a moment longer, he watched the houses.
The horse stamped her feet beneath him, impatient for food and rest. He could do with the same. Maybe if his parents weren’t there, he’d at least be able to beg a bed and meal. He had coins with him, oak and ash, the smaller valued ones, as unscrupulous fairies didn’t always live at Court.
He urged the horse forward and went toward the small stone house that had been standing long before his parents had lived there and would no doubt be standing long after.
A man with dark blond hair, cut short and spiky, stopped his work. He leaned on a staff and watched Verden approach. Around him milled a few white cows with rust-colored tips on their ears. That had been his job once, to bring the cows in at dusk and to make sure they didn’t wander into the river.
“And who might you be?” the man said as Verden drew close.