“Frightened who?”
“The guy who ran away from you. And now we need to get him back.”
“Who was he?”
“He calls himself Elvis. I don’t know his real name.”
“Well, we don’t care about him. We’re here for you. Your name is David Trevellyan?”
“It is. And I’m really happy you’re taking the theft of my boots so seriously - I honestly didn’t think you would, or I’d have called you myself - but right now, finding that guy is more important.”
The office shot a quick glance at his colleague, then turned back to me.
“This has nothing to do with any boots,” he said. “Or with finding Elvis impersonators. What it does have to do with is us taking you into custody.”
“What?” I said. “Are you insane?”
“David Trevellyan, I am placing you under arrest for occasioning actual bodily harm, disturbing the peace, and aggravated assault. You are not obliged to say anything, but anything you do say will be taken down and may be used as evidence against you in a court of law. Understand?”
“I haven’t got time for this nonsense,” I said. “We need to get after the guy I was chasing. Quickly. Before he disappears back down his rabbit hole.”
The policeman handed his coffee to his colleague then reached around behind him and took a pair of handcuffs from his belt. I didn’t like the way things were heading. They clearly had the wrong end of the stick, and I knew if I let them continue, things were only going to get worse. That’s a road I’ve been down before.
“OK,” I said. “I have no idea why you think I’ve done anything wrong, but we need to turn this around before you have a real problem on your hands. The guy you just let escape? He’s a witness. A very important one. In fact, he just hit the top of the Security Service’s hot list. So if you know what’s good for you, you’re going to stop talking about arresting me and start searching for him.”
“Listen, David,” the policeman said. “Can I call you Dave?”
“No.”
“Well, Dave, let me tell you something. You’re not doing yourself any favours here. You need to stop talking and come with us.”
“I don’t think so. You need to help me, right now. Otherwise this moves from a minor bollocking into full-scale arse kicking territory.”
The policeman took a step towards me, still swinging the handcuffs between his finger and thumb.
“Look,” he said. “Come quietly, and we’ll let you stay on your feet. Keep shooting your mouth off, and we’re going to drag you down the station. Your choice. But just so you know - there’s lots of concrete staircases between here and there. Going down those when you’re not properly balanced? Bad idea.”
“You’re not going to bring those cuffs anywhere near my wrists,” I said. “You might as well put them away, right now. And give me some space. I need to make a call.”
“You can call from the station. Now. Last chance. What’s it to be?”
I’ve known people resort to assaulting police officers in nine or ten countries, over the years. I’ve aided and abetted them in four or five. I’ve done it myself, in two. But never until that moment had I been tempted to take a swing at a British bobby.
“We don’t seem to be communicating very effectively, do we constable?” I said. “I need to make a call, and I need to make it now.”
“Enough is…” he was saying, when his radio crackled into life. He stepped away, unhooked his handset, and spoke to someone for forty-five seconds. Then he turned to his colleague.
“Dale,” he said. “We’re going to forget about this joker. Come on. Let’s go.”
“What about my witness?” I said. “You frightened him off. You need to get him back.”
“Mr Trevellyan,” the officer said, scowling at me again. “Something you should know. This time, you’re lucky. But I never forget a face. If I see you again, you won’t like what happens.”
“How do you know?”
“What?”
“How do you know what I like? And don’t like?”
“Well, I… ”
“There’s no sugar in this one, right?” I said, leaning down and taking hold of the remaining polystyrene cup. “What about milk?”
Neither of the policemen answered.
I pried open the lid and looked inside.
“Good,” I said. “Thank you. Now, goodbye, gentlemen.”
Chapter Eleven
I’d been back in my room for less than four minutes when I heard a squeak outside in the corridor. There were two urgent knocks, then the door swung open without me saying a word. It was Melissa, still in her chair.
“David,” she said. “Are you all right? The police? Have they…?”
“They were here,” I said. “Then they left. Someone called them off.”
“That was me. Well, not me directly. I got word they were going to arrest someone because of those idiots in the garden, and I figured it had to be you. I insisted they drop it.”
“Who told you about it?”
“A sergeant at the local station. I made them aware we were working here when I first arrived. It’s standard procedure. They’re supposed to keep us in the loop about anything they’re doing in the vicinity, and luckily this guy was on the ball. I’m just sorry I couldn’t get to them before they showed up here.”
“Me too.”
“They didn’t get rough, did they?”
“Not even close. But they did cause a little bit of fall out.”
“What do you mean? What kind of fall out?”
“I’ll get to that in a second. What I want to know is, why did they come after me? Did those idiots actually file a complaint?”
“Yes, they did.”
“And the police listened to them?”
“Unbelievable, isn’t it?”
“And those morons were able to describe me so accurately the plod came straight to my room? Seems like a bit of a stretch.”
“There’s a little more to it than that. David, remember how I told you that CCTV camera wasn’t working?”
“Clearly.”
“And remember how Leckie told us two zones had been repaired again?”
“The garden was one of them?”
Melissa nodded.
“But I don’t want you to worry,” she said. “When we tell the police to forget something, they forget it. This won’t come back to bite you, David. I guarantee.”
“I hope not.”
“It won’t. So. This fallout you mentioned. What was that all about?”
I told her about Elvis.
“Damn,” she said. “Five minutes with him and I could have gone home happy.”
“That’s what I figured,” I said.
“Oh well. Thanks for finding him, anyway. That was good work.”
“My pleasure.”
“What are the chances of putting your hands on him again, do you think?”
“How quickly?”
“Let’s say, before the sun rises?”
“I’d say, somewhere between zero and zero.”
“That’s what I was thinking. OK. So this is what we’ll do. I’m assuming Elvis Presley isn’t his real name?”