When I made it to the tree where Garth was camped out enjoying some shade, I dropped the bags on his lap. “Thanks for the help.”
Garth shoved the bags aside and waved his finger at me. “You’ve got all the help any man could possibly need stewing over there in your truck.”
I double checked to make sure Garth and I were seeing the same thing. Yep, Jolene was still pissed. “In case you’re losing your vision, that’s not a look of helpfulness on Jolene’s face. She is most definitely not in a helping mood right now.” I rubbed the back of my neck, wondering if I should go apologize. “I said something to upset her . . . but I don’t know what.”
“Shit, Jess. You weren’t over there for longer than two minutes. What were you chatting about that could have hurt poor Jolene’s feeling so?” Garth kicked out his legs, crossed his ankles, and laid down like he was ready for a nap.
“I don’t know. All we did was talk about dinner, Rowen, and if I wanted to marry her one day.”
“Marry who?”
I gave him a look. He knew who I was talking about and was just messing with me.
“Marry. Who?” Garth repeated.
“Marry you, shithead,” I said, kicking the heel of his boot. “Rowen. Marry Rowen.” I couldn’t believe I had to clarify that.
“Oh, well that’s why.”
“That’s why what?”
Garth rolled his eyes before closing them. “That’s why Miss Peace Corps Montana is pissed. You mentioned marriage and Rowen in the same sentence, and I’m guessing there was no addition of polygamy and Jolene.”
“No. No mention of Jolene or polygamy.”
“Hmm, you know, it’s too bad it’s not legal in this state because I might actually turn into the marrying type if I could have a dozen wives.”
“You can’t even take care of yourself. How do you think you’d be able to take care of twelve wives?”
Garth shrugged. “I don’t know. But I sure wouldn’t mind trying.”
“Nice digression, there, but could we get back on point, please? What would make Jolene so upset about me mentioning I want to marry Rowen one day?” I knew she wasn’t the biggest fan of Rowen, and Rowen of her. Some personalities just didn’t click. Rowen’s and Jolene’s definitely didn’t click.
“Questions like that one really make me question your intelligence, Walker.” Garth’s eyes opened just long enough to say the next part. “Jolene likes you. That’s why she’s got her panties in a bunch because you mentioned Rowen and the M word.”
“I know she likes me. I’m a likable guy.”
“Oh my god, shit-for-brains. Jolene doesn’t just like you because you’re a ‘likable guy’”—seeing Garth make air quotes almost made me laugh—“she likes you because she wants you to hump her this way, that way, and another way you didn’t even dream was possible. Oh, and after that, she wants you to put a ring on her finger and let her play house.”
I shook my head. How else could a person respond to that? “Jolene doesn’t like me like that.”
“Uh . . . yes, she does.”
I crossed my arms. “No, she doesn’t.”
Garth studied me for a few seconds, then sat up. “You really are clueless when it comes to the female species, Jess. You know that?”
“I suppose entrusting my girlfriend to my best friend a couple of years ago should have clued me into that.” I gave him an accusatory look.
Garth raised his middle finger at me. “That should have been a big clue, and you not picking up on Jolene’s borderline Fatal Attraction toward you is another.”
I settled my hands on my hips and exhaled. “You really think Jolene likes me . . . in that way.” I didn’t want to bring up the hump, hump, dream hump, ring analogy again.
“Jess, I’m ninety-nine percent she already has your wedding date set and your kids’ names picked out.”
As much as I wanted to believe Garth was wrong, he usually wasn’t about that type of things. Plus, even though she hadn’t outright said it, Rowen didn’t like Jolene and obviously had something against her. Could her knowing Jolene had a thing for me be the reason why? The longer I thought about it, the more it made sense. The longer I thought about it, the more I wondered how I’d been so oblivious. I’d been preoccupied lately, but really, I probably hadn’t noticed because I wasn’t concerned about what Jolene said or did. I didn’t notice because I wasn’t in a noticing frame of mind with her. I noticed Rowen, every single thing she did, and every undertone and hidden meaning in what she said. My mind was trained to notice her, not Jolene, and perhaps that was why I’d missed it.
“You’re positive?”
Garth chuckled darkly. “The only thing I’ve been more positive about is that I’m better looking than you.”
“Says no female in existence.” Narrowly missing his kick, I headed back toward Old Bessie and an even more complicated situation.
“Where you going, ugly?”
“Clearing something up.”
“When you’re done with that, let her know I’m available if she wants to work out any angst or frustration,” Garth said.
Jolene was still gripping the steering wheel and glaring out the windshield when I approached. It didn’t look like she was going to acknowledge me, and that was okay. She didn’t need to; she just needed to hear me.
I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry for upsetting you, Jolene. I’m sorry for hurting your feelings too, if I did that.”
“You did,” she replied slowly.
“I’m sorry for that. But I thought you knew. I thought it was obvious.” I leaned inside the passenger window. My truck was, as I guessed, overpowered by that fruity, sweet perfume.
“What did you think was obvious?” She still wouldn’t look at me.
“That I want to spend the rest of my life with Rowen.” It was sure obvious to everyone else. I don’t know why it hadn’t been to Jolene.
“You’ve made that pretty damn obvious,” Jolene huffed, giving me a sideways glare. “But you know, what if Rowen doesn’t feel the same way? What if one day she wakes up and decides she doesn’t want to spend the rest of her life with you?”
I didn’t want to think about that at all, but I had the answer. “Then I’ll die a single man.”
Jolene laughed a few strained notes.
“It’s her or no one for me, Jolene. I’ve known that for a while now. I can’t control Rowen’s future, but I can control mine. If she decides she doesn’t want me to be a part of hers one day, I’m going to wind up a lonely man.” I sighed, wishing the pain in my chest would go away. “It’s a better option than pretending with someone else.”
Jolene shook her head. “You’d really rather be alone than pretend with someone else?”
“Yes.” It was the obvious choice for me.
She turned the ignition and Old Bessie fired to life. I snagged the cooler out of the bed before she tore off. “You and I really are two totally different people, Jesse. Enjoy your life.” She finally looked over at me. Her eyes were shiny, which made me feel even worse than I already did. “I don’t want you to live alone, but something tells me you’re going to with the woman you’ve picked. A girl like that doesn’t want to be tied down to anything or anyone. A girl like that doesn’t know how to give real love because she’s never been able to accept it.”
My body went rigid. “A girl like Rowen knows something about real love that a girl like you could never understand, Jolene. And that’s all I’m going to mention about Rowen around you again. I think it’s best you leave now. We’ve both said more than enough, I think.”
My words hadn’t been kind ones, I knew that, but neither had hers. I normally didn’t adhere to the repay fire with fire motto, but Jolene saying that Rowen didn’t know how to give or receive real love had angered me in a way that felt unbridled. Even though Rowen was hundreds of miles away and Jolene’s words would never make their way back to her, I still felt an overwhelming need to protect her.