I also caught a cab home since Daddy had driven to Marcella’s office. When I arrived, Mason was just returning home from work. He saw me get out of the cab and must have been able to tell that I had been to hell and back. He came to me and I collapsed into his arms in tears.
Mason and I spent the next few hours talking about everything that had been revealed earlier that day. As usual, he wasn’t judgmental at all. On the contrary, he cried when I told him about Daddy and the pedophilia. He also expressed concern for Flower and I told him that I would go to my grave protecting her, if I had to. In fact, I planned to call her mother the next day and tell her everything myself. I didn’t want to risk leaving it up to Daddy.
Mason pampered me by running me a bath and giving me a deep tissue massage afterward. I was steadily learning that he was a man of many talents. Mason made love to me slowly from behind up against my bedroom wall—so passionately that I wept, because I couldn’t imagine him still wanting me after finding out yet something else devastating about my past.
It was late when I had Mason drop me off at Momma’s condo, close to two in the morning. I used my key and entered without knocking. She was knocked out in her bed and I stood over her for a moment, listening to make sure she was still breathing. For a second, I was scared that she had taken an overdose. That, I would not have been able to handle.
I climbed into bed and took her into my arms. She woke up, saw me, and asked, “Is it you, Jonquinette?”
It was a shame that she had to ask. “Yes, it’s me, Momma. Get some rest.”
We both fell into a much-needed sleep.
The next morning, Daddy was banging on the door by nine. He was taken aback when I answered instead of Momma. His eyes fell to the carpeted hallway. “Jonquinette, I’m so sorry, baby. How can I ever make it up to you?”
“You can’t.” I turned and he followed me into the living room. “Momma’s still sleeping and I have no intention of waking her up. The longer she stays asleep, the longer she doesn’t have to deal with reality.” I rolled my eyes at him and sat down. “I guess I’m an expert at that, huh? Falling asleep, or rather letting someone else take over, so I don’t have to deal with reality.”
Daddy sat down across from me. “I just wanted to come by to say that I’m leaving today. I planned to stop by your place next.”
“Well, now you don’t have to waste a trip,” I stated sarcastically. Then I caught myself. “Daddy, I won’t pretend that I’m not angry. That would be nothing but a performance. I am angry but, at the same time, I understand that you are just as much a victim as me.”
“That’s still no excuse,” Daddy said. “I hurt you and that’s unforgivable.”
“In time, I hope that I can forgive you, but I know that I’ll never forget. At least, now that I know.”
We sat there in an uncomfortable silence for a moment.
“Daddy, I want you to know that I plan to call Allison sometime today and tell her everything.”
“Please, let me do it,” he stated in a desperate tone. “I should be the one to tell her.”
“Maybe, but I have the right to tell her. I have to make sure that nothing happens to Flower. While you mean well, I have to do this so that I have peace of mind.”
He nodded. “I understand, Jonquinette.”
“I’m glad that you do.”
“Can we still spend time together?” he asked. “We lost so many years. All I want is a chance to get to know you again.”
I shook my head and sighed. “Daddy, I need to get through this first before I can answer that. I thought about it long and hard last night and I think being in constant contact with you would hinder my healing process. We both need to heal separately before we can heal together.”
“Marcella alluded to the same thing after you and Meredith left her office yesterday. She gave me the contact information for several doctors in North Carolina. I plan to find one who can see me immediately.”
“That’s a wonderful thing.” I stood back up. “Daddy, I don’t mean to be rude but I can’t think of anything else to say to you right now.” I glanced at the bedroom door. “Plus, I don’t think it would be wise for you to be here when Momma wakes up.”
He stood and headed for the door. “I agree.” When he got to the doorway, he turned and said, “Would it be too much if I asked for a hug? Just in case it’s the last one.”
I hesitated at first and then embraced him tightly. “Good-bye, Daddy.”
When he let go of me, I spotted a tear in the corner of his right eye. “Good-bye, Jonquinette.”
I watched him saunter down the hallway and closed the door as he pushed the call button for the elevator.
40
marcella
I decided to conduct the next therapy session at Jonquinette’s apartment. I wanted all of the personalities to feel comfortable and it was the obvious choice. I spoke to Jude first. She greeted me at the door. I knew it was her right away from the way that she grinned at me and carried herself.
“Good morning, Jude,” I said.
“Good morning, Marcella. Come on in. We’ve been expecting you.”
“You sound mighty cheerful this morning.”
Jude shrugged. “What can I say? If you can’t beat them, join them.”
“So you realize there are others?” I asked.
“I know there’s at least one. When Jonquinette came back into your office, so did I, and I heard everything she heard.”
“I take that to mean that you never knew about Henry’s molestation of Jonquinette?”
Jude shook her head. “No, I didn’t. I just always knew I didn’t like the bastard. It seems that my actions have now been justified.” She laughed. “At least I didn’t attempt to outright kill him. If I had, I wouldn’t have missed.”
I chuckled. “No, I don’t suppose you would have.”
Jude walked over to the window and peered out. “I’ve been giving this a lot of consideration. Jon’s been through a lot.”
“Yes, she has, and you’ve been there for her when she needed you most.”
“But now she doesn’t need me anymore. Is that what you’re getting at?”
“You tell me. Does she still need you?”
“I hate to admit this but I suppose not. That doesn’t mean I’m going away completely, though. I might just stop doing all the bad things I’ve been doing and let Jon make all the decisions.”
“So you admit that you’ve been doing bad things?”
“Of course. I won’t even attempt to sugarcoat it. Jon was boring, simple as that. I had to do something adventurous to make life bearable. But now that she’s dating this Mason dude, who’s all right by the way, things are looking up.”
“You like Mason?”
“He’s growing on me, slowly. He’s romantic and that’s a good sign. I believe that he loves Jon and I know for a fact that she loves him. Who am I to interfere with what could be the love affair of the century?”
“I’m delighted to hear you say that, Jude.” I walked over to her and placed my hand on her shoulder. For once, she didn’t yank it away from me. “Jude, I know that this is hard on you. You’re a person just like Jonquinette and Jetta.”
“I meant what I said before,” Jude stated, turning to look at me. “I never set out to hurt Jonquinette. I love her. But, I had to do what I had to do and as far as the sex, that was my escape.”
“I understand perfectly.”
“Marcella, I’ve made up my mind. Yes, I’ve definitely made it up. I’m going to let Jon live her life the way she wants to.” Jude actually seemed excited as she spoke the words. “She deserves it. She’s been through enough.” She paused and added, “I can’t speak for this Jetta person, though. I don’t even know her ass but I like her.”