She thanked me for watching after Robyn, and apologized for waking me, but that she'd been told that Robyn had contacted the nurse at school about getting some birth control (which damn near floored*me* – but I recovered from it before she noticed), and she was more than a little suspicious of *every* male that Robyn was coming in contact with. She admitted that when she'd come over earlier, she'd thought that she'd find some indication that Robyn and I had been "intimate" – but when Robyn answered the door, and she got inside and saw that Robyn had been asleep on the couch, started to think that maybe she'd been wrong in her suspicions about me. Then when she saw ME coming out of the bedroom, 'obviously' haven been just wakened, she knew that I wasn't the one she had to worry about. All during this, it was all I could do not to start laughing out loud – both from relief, and at the situation itself.
I asked her if she wanted to sit down, and maybe have a cup of coffee; she agreed "Black, please", and went over to sit in the chair while I got us each a cup of coffee. I took it into the living room, gave her one, and sat down on the couch across from her.
After we'd each taken a few sips, I told her that Robyn had asked me some questions about boys and sex; and followed that by telling her what I'd told Robyn. I cautioned her against mentioning anything about it to Robyn, saying that if Robyn found out that I'd talked to her mother about things she'd said to me in private, she'd stop trusting*either* of us.
That gave her mother something to think about for a few moments, and she said that she understood, and wouldn't say anything to Robyn about our conversations. I thanked her, and then asked her if I could make a few observations as a 'disinterested bystander'; she gave me a wry smile, and said "Go ahead".
I told her that it was obvious "even to me" that Robyn was starting to develop physically. She agreed, saying that she'd started to develop early, herself. That gave me the opening I'd been hoping for, and asked her if she'd had an interest in boys when she was younger, too. She gave me a rueful smile, and admitted that she'd been "just a little boy-crazy".
I followed that up by asking her if her parents hadn't warned her about 'going too far' with a boy, and she said they had. Then I asked her if it had made a whole lot of difference to her. She hesitated a bit, and finally admitted that it hadn't, really. Then I questioned her with "So it sounds like you're saying that your parents telling you to say 'no' didn't have a lot of impact on your decision. Do you wish they'd shown you a few more choices, then?"; she sniffled a little, and said that she did. I got her a tissue (she was starting to leak around the edges a bit), and continued with "When you lost your virginity, was it a pleasant experience?" – she immediately started to get angry, and looked at me as though she'd like to slap me silly. I just sat there, calmly, and after she'd had a chance to think about our conversation so far, relaxed again, and reluctantly admitted that it hadn't. I reassured her that I wasn't asking the questions I was out of any personal desire, but simply to help her understand what was going on with Robyn. She nodded her understanding, and I said "How long was it after your first time was it before you really started enjoying sex, and understood that it could be a pleasant and even satisfying experience?"; I waited several seconds as I watched her thinking about the answer before she whispered "too long, I think". With that, I knew how I could get her to give Robyn a little more 'breathing space', and followed up by asking "Would you want Robyn to go through what you did, then?", to which she quickly replied "No".
I let her think about that for a couple minutes as we sat and sipped on our coffee some more.
When she'd collected herself a bit, I told her that I thought Robyn was a pretty smart "young woman" (which got me a slightly dirty look), and said that I thought Robyn was showing some pretty good sense and a surprising amount of responsibility by asking for birth control. Lucy admitted that it was, but saying that she really didn't think that Robyn was ready to start having sex yet. I asked her if she really thought Robyn would ever be ready, and she laughingly admitted she didn't really think so. Then I asked her if her parents attitudes and opinions had made a great deal of difference in her own decision to become sexual, and she grudgingly admitted not. I could see that she was expecting it, then, when I asked her "Then do you really think that what Robyn does is going to be affected that much by what YOU think or say?"; and she could only admit that she didn't think so. I told her "I think Robyn is going to do what Robyn wants to do, in that area. I think she's got enough smarts that she's going to pick her own time, her own place, and who she wants to be the first. I don't think that there's a whole lot you could do to stop her; and I think if you got to insistent about it, you'd only alienate her." Lucy thought about that for a bit as we both sipped on our coffee some more, and I followed it with "If you want to keep a strong, loving relationship with Robyn, I think the best thing you could do would be to sit down with her, and explain to her why you think she should wait until she's ready. Tell her that you love her, and that you hope she'll take her time about choosing who she wants to be her first, but that once she makes her decision about it, one way or another, you'll still love her and support her. You don't have to encourage her," – getting me a chuckle at the irony of such a statement – " but I think you can let her know that you love her, trust her to make the decision that's right for her, and exercise caution and responsibility along the way. Make sure she knows about the possible consequences of sexual contact," – she nodded at that – " and try to let her know that you understand the feelings she's having, since you had them about her age, too. That way, I think she'll start to trust you, and will be more willing to come to you with her problems and questions on the matter -*as long as you don't 'preach' to her, or abuse the trust she shows you*". That last part really got her attention, since I'd been sure and emphasize it. I followed that by telling her "I think as long as you don't do anything to abuse her trust -*no matter what*, then you'll have a better chance of guiding her than if she felt as though she couldn't talk to you about anything. The biggest problem you're probably going to have is talking to her in a way that lets her know you care, but without 'preaching' at her. The next hardest thing will probably be making sure that you clearly separate your own opinions about things from the real facts". That got me a questioning look, and a "What do you mean?"; so I replied "What do you tell her if she comes to you and asks you about homosexuality? Do you give her the pure facts, or do you dump a lot of society's ill will toward gays on her?", which prompted her to get a real thoughtful look on her face.
While she was mulling that over, I finished up my coffee, stood up, and took her cup, heading in to the kitchen to get us each a refill.
When I got back, Lucy had pulled her legs up under herself in the chair, giving me a nice view – when I sat down again – of the bottom of her ass cheeks where they peeked out from under her shorts. She asked me how it was that I got so smart about such things, and I told her that it was easy – I didn't have any kids, making her laugh. She said that I seemed like a pretty smart guy, and asked how I got to the point of working for myself. I gave her the nickel explanation: humble beginnings, poor-in-cash, rich-in-spirit, did poorly in school because of boredom, went into the military to learn a trade, traveled all over half the world, paid attention to what I saw as I traveled around, got out, worked for others for a while, and finally figured out how to bring together what I was good at with what I enjoyed doing. I played the whole thing down, but she seemed to think that it was kinda spectacular, anyway. She said that I seemed pretty calm about things (adding with a smile, "even having someone wake you up at 5 AM"), and asked if I was a religious person. That prompted me to give her pretty much the same spiel that I'd given Robyn, with a few more explanations tossed in, in response to questions she asked.