***
Diana
James was everything that a mother could hope their son would grow up to be. He was successful, charming, handsome, intelligent, kind, sensitive, and more important than anything else, he was happy.
All they ever hoped for James was his happiness and only Diana and Michael knew how hard that was for James. To the outside world James led a charmed life, and the truth was he really did, but what the world didn’t see was all the sacrifices he had made to have that life. He’d fought the dark periods in his life and always come out on top but that didn’t mean that they weren’t there or that they didn’t leave scars—deep, permanent and ugly scars.
As Diana watched her son she was more thankful for Anna than she could ever express. Since Anna there had been no dark days. It was like she was the light inside James and made his world sparkle. And although Anna knew vaguely of James’s struggles she’d never experienced one first hand, and Diana prayed that she would never have to.
***
Anna
Anna led James back to the table where they sat quietly and enjoyed their meal. James couldn’t help but keep checking his watch, waiting anxiously for the surprise Anna had alluded to. After their meal, Anna told Diana that she and James were going to take a walk, and she would find her own way back to Chesterfield. James shot Anna a bewildered look. Anna just smiled mischievously and offered a slight nod as she reached down and took his hand.
The temperature had dropped noticeably since their arrival and it was snowing lightly. Anna’s dark brown spirals were collecting the soft snowflakes. They landed in her hair, on her nose, and on the ends of her eyelashes. Anna dropped James’s hand and stood with her arms high above her head, spinning around. She looked like an innocent child who’d never before seen snow.
“Where are we going? You realise I have to work tomorrow,” James’s voice was thick with sarcasm.
“What do you mean you have to work? You haven’t done an honest day’s work in your charmed life,” Anna teased. “And of course I know where we’re going. But if you don’t want to come…” Anna mocked.
“I didn’t say that now, did I?” James scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder like she weighed nothing at all. Anna squealed with delight as James slapped her playfully, earning him another squawk.
***
James
Something inside James stirred. The same something that had stirred last night and almost ruined everything. As much as James loved being with Anna right now he knew that they needed some space. He didn’t trust himself to keep his hands off her. If he didn’t put some distance between them, they would inevitably get themselves into something they couldn’t take back.
James’s voice was filled with fear and sadness as he stammered, “L-Look, Anna.” He began sliding her down his body until her feet touched the ground. Anna couldn’t conceal the shock in her eyes as she felt his arousal through her dress. “I really have to get going. I’ve got a big day tomorrow. Will you be all right to get home?” James was staring directly at the ground, he couldn’t even bear to look at her. He couldn’t risk seeing the pain and rejection on her face. He obviously wanted her but now he was pushing her away.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” She gulped, unable to hide her disappointment. Without another word James dropped a chaste kiss on her cheek and disappeared into the night, leaving her standing cold and alone.
***
Anna
Anna wasn’t ready to go home. She needed time to digest what just happened. She couldn’t bear the thought of anyone knowing she’d been rejected. Again. Cast aside. Forcing the hurt aside, Anna determined to savour every moment of it. The ground was steadily being covered in a dusting of soft white snow. It was a clear night with a light breeze blowing at her back. Wrapping her arms around her chest like armour against the cold, Anna continued to walk down the road, often stopping to admire the window displays. Despite being completely bewitched by her surroundings Anna was confused and hurt by what had happened. Maybe it was what hadn’t happened? She didn’t know what she had done wrong nor could she understand why he had left in such a hurry. With her heart pounding in her chest, Anna lost interest in the romance of her surroundings and caught a taxi back to the hotel.
As Anna wandered thoughtlessly through the front door she was nearly bowled over by Diana, who came flying down the stairs to greet her. “Where have you been? We’ve been so worried,” Diana was babbling, barely forming actual words.
“I went for a walk. I was with James, you knew that. I don’t understand.” Anna was bewildered as to why all the panic.
“James got back to his hotel over an hour ago. He rang to make sure you got home safely. What happened? Where did you get to? Are you all right? Anna, talk to me. Please,” Diana interrogated, demanding an explanation.
“Well, after James left I just kept walking. I needed a chance to breathe. Get my head together. I had a lot on my mind,” Anna tried desperately to explain, but she was inconsolable as the dam burst and large, fat tears swallowed her. Something inside her snapped and she was consumed by feelings of guilt and frustration. She wanted to scream and throw things and kick her legs, but she knew none of it would help. She wanted desperately to understand why James had walked away, and so damn easily. Then the sad realisation crept in that maybe this was a sign that things weren’t going to work out for them after all.
For some strange reason Grant appeared in Anna’s mind. She remembered his hurtful words. She recalled what Justin had tried to tell her, and then unconsciously her mind drifted to the car accident which had almost ended her life prematurely. Maybe this was it. How it was supposed to be. Had Grant been right when he told her that James deserved better? Or had Justin been right suggesting James didn’t want anything more than Anna could give him? She was more confused than ever before.
“Anna, what the hell happened? What did that idiot son of mine do this time?” Michael asked firmly. The directness of his words made Anna do a double take. Michael couldn’t help but grin with satisfaction when he saw a smile creep out from underneath Anna’s tears.
“Nothing. He didn’t do anything wrong. I think I did,” Anna sobbed, wiping the tears away with the back of her hand and sniffing loudly.
“I don’t understand,” Michael admitted, raising a quizzical eyebrow.
“Nobody knew it, but when James and I got together we agreed that we wouldn’t sleep together until we were married. It wasn’t a big deal. It was something that I believed in and James just accepted it. No questions asked. He never once pushed. Our entire relationship he’s been nothing but a perfect gentleman. You raised a great guy, Michael, you really did.” Anna forced a sad smile. “But last night we got carried away, and now, I feel like he blames me. Nothing happened, but James won’t even look at me. I can’t help but think that this is his way of ending things.” Anna collapsed into Michael’s arms. She was more exhausted than she realised. Her whole body shook violently with sobs and without Michael’s support she would have slumped to the floor in a puddle.
The shock etched on Michael’s face was evident. James and Anna had waited. They were so in love and so comfortable in other other’s arms that that to anyone looking they were one hundred percent together. “Anna, Princess. Come on, sweetheart. You know James better than that. And you know he wouldn’t do that to you. He loves you too much to ever hurt you. Deep down you know that.”
“I know he loves me. I do. I’m just not sure that he loves me enough anymore.” Anna’s smile almost broke Michael’s heart. Pulling her back from him, Michael planted his hands on her shoulders, waiting ’til he was sure she was stable enough on her feet to let her go. “Thank you, Michael. For everything.” Michael just nodded and vanished out the door.