He glanced over his shoulder to where Aaron was bringing up the rear with Bennett…and received a dagger-eyed glare for his trouble.
Beside him Jacob cleared his throat. “Remind me in the future not to place you two on any patrol shifts together.”
Valin raised his brow. “Does this mean we pass?” He figured the only reason Jacob had let them come out tonight was not so much to “get a feel” for their skill level but because the man wanted to test them and see where their loyalties lie.
“Not yet, but so far so good. And if you and Aaron both make it back without bloodied noses—or worse—I think we can consider this a success.”
“Wonderful,” Valin drawled and received an inquisitive look from Jacob. “Good to know you trust me.”
Jacob chuckled. “Hell no, I don’t trust you. But I do trust in your nature.”
“And what is my nature?”
“To protect your mate. Which is why I’m going to reiterate to my brother that he needs to back the hell off you and Gabriella.”
Valin felt like the air had been sucked out from around him. For a moment all he could do was blink at Jacob—as if clearing his eyes would reveal a two-headed demon rather than the soldier that walked beside him.
Jacob cocked his brow. “The hovering around her all the time, the I’ll-kill-you glare you give any man that comes near…that crazed look in your eyes whenever you don’t know where she is? You’re not going to tell me I’m wrong, are you?”
Valin blew out a breath and nodded. “You’re not wrong.”
“Then why are you so surprised? You don’t think I would try and spare my brother the heartache if I can?”
“No, I’m just surprised you know about the mate bond.” The mate bond was a once in a lifetime kind of thing for a Paladin. Beyond silly notions of true love, kindred spirits, or even a human’s idea of soul mates, it was a bond between two souls that was designed by the Big Guy Himself. The original angelic volunteers who’d come to earth to pick up weapons against the fallen Lucifer’s evil hordes had thought it their reward for the sacrifice they’d had to make to take up those arms—the peace and completeness a Paladin received from the mate bond being the balm for a soul that had been rendered incomplete at the removal of its wings. But as more time passed and less mate bonds were forged, the golden glow of that idea faded as newer generations of warriors were forced to search out compatibility pairings in order to ensure the continuity of their order. In fact, most of the Paladin alive today had never found their mates. And when they did? Well, look at what happened to Logan.
Jacob heaved a large sigh, shifting the belt of ammo strapped over his shoulder under his trench coat. Valin wondered briefly if the man wore the coat in the hot summer months too, and if not, how he hid the virtual warehouse of weapons he toted around from the general public.
“My parents were mated,” Jacob said, causing Valin to do the blinky-blinky headlight thing again. “Oh, they didn’t call it a bond, just soul mates. My father told me it was far more than simple love. I always thought it was kinda kooky until Mother died. He died a week later. Stupid thing, really; picked a fight with one of those half-demon creatures. I think he knew he wasn’t going to come out of it alive and I think he was glad for it.”
Valin nodded, swallowing the jagged shard of lead that seemed to have magically appeared in his throat. “It’s common, actually. The loss of a bond mate has been known to drive the remaining mate to insanity. Especially if they feel like the other’s death could have been prevented.”
“Prevented by them, you mean.”
Valin nodded again, not even able to respond this time. If he hadn’t been off skipping around the shade that night…if he had kept a tether open rather than clamping tight on his shields…
Jacob frowned, studying him. “Is there only ever one soul mate, or can a Paladin move on?”
Valin took a deep breath, pushing away the what-ifs. Even if Angeline had been able to reach him in her need, it was unlikely he would have gotten there in time. “A Paladin can live if his will is strong enough, but not move on,” he answered, surprised at how calm and even his voice came out. Though it must have been too even, too measured, because Jacob was staring at him knowingly.
He gave a barely perceptible shake of his head. Don’t ask. Don’t make me relive that.
Jacob frowned, coming to a complete stop under a flickering lamppost. “You’ve lost someone.”
Not a question, but a statement, and one that had the other man obviously struggling to fit in with the little he thought he knew of mate bonds and what Valin had just supposedly confirmed about his feelings for Gabriella.
Valin turned to look at him, well aware of the fact that Bennett and Aaron had drawn close enough to hear. Didn’t matter. Bennett already knew and Aaron, well, right now he didn’t give much of a fuck about that prick.
“I lost my pair bond. She was my best friend and we were compatible enough to be given His blessing and form a pairing.” He swallowed, looking forward. “However, I was not blessed enough to share her life for more than a few years.” And never Peanut’s. He’d never get to hold his unborn child.
“Valin?”
He sensed more than saw Bennett come up beside him, his hand hovering awkwardly above his shoulder. Valin shook his head, stepping away from the Paladin’s offer of support. It was too fucking close to comfort and might very well break the dam on the grief that he’d shored up so very long ago.
“I thought we were on patrol,” he snapped as he spun around and stalked toward the next intersection, the other three falling in line. Their silence was so thick that the flapping wings of a pigeon taking off from the roof of the boarded-up building beside them had him practically jumping out of his skin.
Stupid. How long had he stood there pouring out his heart and opening old wounds? More important, why had he let Jacob peel back those scabs? He rolled his shoulders, closing his eyes briefly as he sent out his consciousness for another sweep. What trickled across his senses had his muscles tensing into hard knots. “Oh, shit.”
“What?” Jacob asked, his hand shifting into the folds of his trench coat.
No need to answer when two merkers rounded the corner less than ten feet ahead of them. Unfortunately they weren’t the only ones who’d just pinged on his radar.
<<Bennett! The roof!>> he yelled, hoping the projective blast would distract the merker enough to make him hesitate. But it was too late. That was a pyrotechnic merker back there, and this time hell had come from above.
Gabby fought for breath, her knees buckling as she reached out for something to catch herself on. Nothing was there. She stumbled to the sidewalk as the blast of Valin’s projection wrenched through her mind, tearing at both her shields and her grasp on consciousness. For five long seconds she battled the pounding wave of fear and alarm that rolled in like a tsunami after the initial stab of contact, concentrating instead on the gritty feel of the cement beneath her fingertips. Couldn’t think. Couldn’t breathe!
Finally she was able to gasp in air. For once, the sweet ache of gas fumes and rotting trash filling her lungs was a welcome sensation, as was the fact that she was alone in her mind once more to enjoy the return to her own reality and the comforting blanket of her shields snapping back in place. That is, it was reassuring until she realized that she had no fucking idea what had happened.
Holy crap, Valin packed a powerful punch. How had he breached her shields like that? Why had she caught the thought that had obviously been meant for someone else? And how the heck had he managed to project what he was feeling along with the thought?