“You can do this, you can do this, you can do this.” The words are forefront, but the cacophony of screams and yells behind them are meaningless, except that they fill me with fear.
“You must,” Pace says, and I only know what he is saying because his mouth forms the words. Janna pulls at me, propelling me forward.
Pace shoves her away and wraps his arms around me. “I love you, Wren. Now stay alive.”
I want to stay alive. But only if I can stay wrapped in his embrace and have the rest of the world go away. I want to crawl back in our cave where it was just me and Pace with Pip and Jonah. I want the water that wiped out our village to have carried us away that day too, because I am so tired of fighting, so tired of the confusion, so tired of being responsible for lives other than my own.
Wouldn’t it be easier to just die, because I am certain I cannot do this thing again?
But I must.
Ragnor and Janna pull us apart. I would think Ragnor would be violent with Pace because he dared to push his wife, but he isn’t. I can see compassion in both their eyes. They stand on either side of me as they guide me to the front of the line. I stare down the length of it. At the flames that shoot up behind the one side of people and the dark and distorted faces that scream and yell for me to come on so they can kill me.
I will not let them win. I will not let my father win. And just like that, the world goes silent so all I can hear is the sound of my heart beating in my chest. I take off.
16
I do not remember running the third time. All I remember was after, when it was over and someone carried me to the hut. Either Levi or Pace, I don’t know which, all I know is that I thought I was floating as I looked up at the endless sky and the innumerable stars, thinking the world is spinning like a top and I could feel it move. When I opened my eyes later I realized we were all, for the moment, safe.
The hut has no light except for the torches outside that shine through the openings in the walls. My head lies on something soft, and I realize it is Jilly’s lap. She smiles at me as I stare up at her, trying to get my bearings. “We’re all here,” she says. “Thanks to you.”
My head hurts and I automatically raise my hand to touch my temple. I can feel the dried blood on my skin and the jagged cut. Another scar for my collection. At this rate there will be nothing left of me by the time I am twenty, if I survive that long. Somewhere along the line I lost my kerchief. It’s been a part of me for so long that I feel naked without it being somewhere on my person.
Pace and Levi rush to me and kneel next to me, one on one side, one on the other. Beyond them I see Colm and Tobias turn from their posts of watching outside to glance my way with their shiner eyes.
“What happened?” I ask.
“You were amazing,” Levi says. Pace takes my hand into his and smiles his sweet smile.
I move and groan as my body protests. “I don’t feel amazing,” I say. “I feel like I got caught in a cave-in.”
“You’re going to be covered with bruises by tomorrow,” Levi says. He sits back on his heels while Pace settles next to me, still holding my hand. I move to sit up and he helps me, but every place he touches screams in agony.
“What did you call that?” I asked. “You seemed familiar with it.”
“A gauntlet. It is something used by the Indian tribes in America as a test of courage, so I was surprised to see the rovers use it also, especially since their level of education is so primitive. But it was well known before the comet, so I suppose some American history could have been remembered along with your own throughout the years.”
“What happens next?” I ask.
“We are to be auctioned off as slaves,” Levi informs me. “Which means we will likely be separated, so we have got to come up with a plan tonight.”
“They’re coming,” Colm says. “Looks like with food and blankets.” Colm and Tobias leave their positions and sit on the ground. Ellen perks up from where she sits beside Jilly. It is only a few quick moments before the sound of the door being unlocked is heard and Ragnor and Janna come in, along with Ragnor’s brother. They carry a basket of food and what looks like loosely woven rugs. Janna and the brother set everything down right inside the door.
“Wren,” Ragnor says. “Ye are to ah-come with me.”
“Why?” “For what reason?” “Can’t you see she’s hurt?” Levi and Pace both rise in protest. Ragnor holds his hand up to stop the discussion. “She will not be ah-harmed, I promise ye.”
I hold up my hand to Pace because I know I do not have the strength to climb to my feet on my own. He helps me up and my muscles scream at the abuse. Still he does not let go of my arm. Levi steps in front of both of us. “When will she be back?” I cannot see his face, but I can tell by his posture that he is ready to fight if he feels the need.
Ragnor pins Levi with a stare. “I cannot answer ah-that,” he says.
“Please don’t take her,” Jilly implores.
“No,” I say. “I’ll go.” I look at Ragnor. “Can I have a moment with my friends? In case I don’t come back?” Ragnor looks at Janna who jerks her head in agreement. They step out of the hut and shut the door, but the shadows of their backs are still there.
“This might be my chance to convince him to help us,” I whisper to Pace and Levi as Colm and Tobias help Jilly up and they, along with Ellen, join our tight circle.
“You have no idea where he is taking you,” Levi says.
“I think I know,” Pace says. “He’s taking her to the man on the platform. The leader. I saw him watching Wren. He wants to meet her, to see what she’s like.”
“Examining his purchase before he buys it?” Jilly offers. “The pig.”
“It’s a chance to learn about them,” I say. “And maybe see a way out for all of us.”
“You will see more than the rest of us,” Levi admits. “But Wren … if you don’t come back, how will we find you?”
“You’ll think of something,” I say. “And it’s not really as if we have a choice. Ragnor has just decided to be nice to us. He doesn’t have to be. If we make too much of it, the rovers might take it as a sign of weakness on his part and we will lose what little we have.”
Regretfully, Levi and Pace nod their agreement. Jilly grabs on to me and hugs me tight, then Pace does the same and I try not to groan in pain. The urge to stay sheltered in his arms is great, but I know by the impatient shifting we hear beyond the walls of the hut that our time is over. Levi walks me to the door.
“You think like a leader, Wren,” he whispers in my ear. “Do not doubt yourself now. Follow your instincts.”
All I can do is nod as Ragnor opens the door. As long as they believe in me … I must succeed at finding something that will help us.
“It would have been nice to eat first,” I say to Ragnor. Every inch of my body feels bruised and battered and each movement is painful. I am afraid to see what I will look like come morning.
“You will be fed,” he assures me. Pace was right. I am going to see the leader. That notion somehow is a lot more frightening now than it was when I was inside with my friends.
The settlement is quiet now. I hear the murmurs of voices within the huts and that, along with the running water of the stream, reminds me of home. Funny thought, that. The cavern was my home, now I am without one. Instead of a place, the people I love are my home. Wherever they are is where I want to be. But I want it to be everyone, including Pip, Jonah, and Ghost.
Where are they? There was no sign of any of our friends during the gauntlet, but that doesn’t mean anything. They could simply be imprisoned elsewhere.
Or dead.
I am not paying attention to my purpose. I let myself get caught up in my own thoughts.