Nell tried to speak, but was still so shaken she had to clear her throat multiple times before her voice sounded. “Yes, I’m fine,” she squeaked.
He looked at her for a second. “That didn’t sound very convincing. Here, let me walk you to your room. Is that okay?” he asked, making sure that she felt comfortable with him.
“Yes, that would be nice.”
He walked next to her down the hall, apparently oblivious to the angry glares that the other Guard members were giving him. She wished she could ignore their stares so easily, but it was so frightening to be surrounded by so many hateful faces. Nell looked up at the man walking next to her and felt better. He had a grin on his face that was contagious.
“My name is Armaan, by the way. What’s yours?” he asked.
She thought it was funny he could ask such a normal question given what had just happened. “Um, Nell,” she replied.
“So is Um your first name then, or should I call you Nell?” he teased.
“Nell is preferred to Um, but given what you just did for me, you can call me anything and I wouldn’t care.”
“Okay, I’ll call you ‘Anything’ if you really want me to. So, Anything, how long have you been at the Hovel?”
She laughed at the way his mind worked. She’d never met anyone like him. Most Healers were so serious. “I’m coming up on my fifth year. How about you?” she asked through a laugh.
“I’ll tell you what, Anything, I’ve been here almost seven years, but it feels like one hundred.”
He tried to say it with the same lightness he’d said everything else, but she heard the torment in his voice. His smile was in place, but she could see that it wasn’t his real one. Before she could study him further, he looked away.
“I’m sorry if what you did back there gets you into some trouble,” she said quietly so the Guard around them couldn’t hear.
“Oh, it’s all right. I’ve wanted to bring Chet some pain for a while. Heck, I should even be thanking you.” He turned to her and put a hand delicately on her shoulder. “Thank you,” he said with wholehearted sincerity.
“Um, you’re welcome…” Nell said unsure of what else to say.
She didn’t know how to act around him. She’d only known him for ten minutes, and already it was hard to keep up. He was like the ocean, constantly changing. His eyes even looked like the ocean. They were a deep bluish grey and seemed to hide a million secrets below their surface. She’d been taking in his every detail as they walked and felt conflicted. He was kind and attentive to her, making her laugh and cautiously searching her for signs of shock but through all of his kindness, she could still see darkness within him. She stopped in front of her room, and the expression on his face changed.
“Can I tell you something, Nell?” he asked, looking at her pleadingly.
“Sure.”
Armaan leaned down to her and put his mouth next to her ear. “Be here, outside of your door at midnight if you want to leave this place,” he whispered.
What did he mean? Where else could she go?
He was gone before she could ask him any of the questions running through her mind.
12
Amanda sat on the ground wrapped tightly in Cole’s thick cloak. The temperature was dropping fast, so he built a fire. She’d never sat around a campfire before, and it gave her the oddest feeling. The bright fingers of the fire lit their small circle and a few feet beyond. The flames stretched out and cast an orange hue across everything they touched. Even Cole’s dark eyes had a tinge of the color to them. Where the fire’s light couldn’t quite reach was a sheet of utter darkness that her eyes couldn’t pierce no matter how hard she tried. Their ring, suspended in the flames glow, made her think of the pre-Columbus days. Like if she took one step from the bright sphere, she’d fall right off the end of the earth.
Madgie threw another log on the fire, and Amanda snapped out of the trance that the flames had danced her into. “Well, Cole might be better to tell you the specifics of the Guard. Since he has actually trained with them, like all boys do, but since I’m the oldest here by a long shot…” She waited sarcastically for an objection and then faked offense when none was given and continued. “The Guard is something that is very controversial among Healers, at least people who have a mind of their own. You see, those chosen to be members are no longer Healers in the traditional sense. I mean you can’t change what you are, but they no longer enter Scars.”
“Wait. You can’t just choose to no longer heal Scars. I know. I tried to run from them…” Amanda interrupted.
She stopped and took a breath. Amanda didn’t like talking about the time she’d spent away from the Hovel. Two years of hunger and thirst and pain and loneliness, but that’s to be expected when you’re thirteen-years-old alone on the streets.
“You can’t just choose to not go into a Scar. I never felt like I was a good Healer and spent a good chunk of my life trying not to go into them because I knew I’d let the spirit down. But no matter where I was or how hard I tried, they took me regardless.” Madgie’s face brightened. “That’s because we don’t choose them, they choose us.”
Amanda sat a little straighter. “Well, why would they choose me? I don’t even heal half of the Scars I enter!”
“Your spirit is bright, and it beckons to them. Even though you feel otherwise, it doesn’t change the truth. Did you know you’ve fallen into more Scars than any one Healer I’ve ever known?” Madgie gushed.
Amanda knew her sweet mentor meant what she said, but it only frustrated her more. Madgie must have read her emotions, because she went back to her speech.
“These Guard members are picked at a young age. All of the boys who are gathered in the dredging at the age of ten must train with the guard for two years. Those who show more interest move on to stricter combat training…” She paused and gestured to Cole. “I believe you went to the next level of training.”
“Yes.” He nodded.
Madgie looked like she wanted him to continue, but he wouldn’t oblige so she marched on. “Well, this group of boys trains in combative spells at a new level, and they’re put into rankings. The higher ranking you are, the more you learn, but to be a member of the Guard, you cannot be slipping in and out of Scars all of the time. You are to do the bidding of the Ancients, so you need to be ready at all times.”
“But that’s impossible! It’s hard to even schedule classes at the Hovel because of it,” Amanda interrupted again.
Madgie held up her hand. “I know what you think. Just listen.”
Amanda sat back and nodded.
“The Ancients wanted to know if their Guard could have all the powers of the Healers with none of the obligations. Impossible, right? No. They figured they could have this by altering one simple fact. Scars are drawn to the bright light and spirit of Healers. Extinguish that light, and you have the Guard.” Amanda grew cold as Madgie continued.
“You might be wondering, ‘How do you take away a Healer’s light?’ The answer is simple. With darkness,” Madgie finished.
Amanda felt Cole’s body grow tense next to her. “But how is that possible?” she asked, turning to him.
Cole’s strong features were highlighted against the firelight, casting sinister shadows. His face looked hollow and angry, an empty shell of the person she knew. Amanda would have been frightened if that look were on anyone else’s face, but seeing it on his tore at her heart. She thought he looked like he was a million miles away, unaware the two ladies were even having a conversation, until she noticed the strange set of his mouth. He was biting down hard on his lower lip as the rest of his mouth seemed to fight against it.