In the end, I calmed down and was able to look at the facts without strong emotions. The murder happened two months after my last visit to Natasha. Since prostitution was not legal in Russia, the chances are that she simply ran away with everyone else. This would explain the fact that the woman did not know what was happening in her apartment. The policeman said that he well remembers the details of that case, but, unfortunately, I could not ask him if they had any information about Natasha or not. Then it was still summer, and Natasha had time before the winter to find work – normal work. And if she could not do this, then perhaps she could go to her father and live with him until she found something. Life gave her a second chance to make the right choice. And as for me, I came to terms with the fact that time had gone… Who knows, maybe she got married, has children, and lives a happy life, while I am beating myself up because of her?
During the events described above, I received two telepathic messages from Thao.
The first one came to me during my lamentation about Natasha. I thought that had I helped her, I could have lived a happy life. And even if she would refuse to go with me, my declaration of love and my desire to help her would still help me start looking for a girlfriend in Moscow, which would in turn help me to get rid of masturbation and, consequently, health problems. While I was thinking about all this, beating myself up in the middle of the day, I received a telepathic message from Thao. She spoke in a clear voice in English, saying that in that case I would not have met her, Biastra and others. It is so.
Many telepathic messages and dreams from my friends from Thiaoouba contained information that was mainly useful to me alone. These messages were addressed to me personally to help me get out of the terrible mental and psychological state I was in.
It is possible that my sincere desire to learn from my own experience about Auras, telekinesis and other spiritual things also helped to “open” for some time the “door” of Universal Law so that Thiaooubians could help me when I needed help the most.
Another telepathic message came to me from Thao after I woke up. She said: “There are other joys in life”. It was referring to sex, the absence of which I was so worried about at that time. I realized that this message was from Thao, since she used the words “other joys” when she told Michel that Arki’s death was really sad, but they should not be selfish, as other adventures and other joys probably awaited him in subsequent lives.
Both telepathic messages were in the form of a voice in the head, and they sounded very clear and “loud”, completely different from how we “talk” to ourselves in our head (for example, when reading a book to ourselves, or when “voicing” what we daydream about).
This experience with telepathy showed that there are at least two types of telepathic communication: a stream of thoughts and a voice in the head. An example of a possible third type of telepathy would be how Latoli, not knowing French, telepathically “dipped” into Michel Desmarquet’s mind when he was delivering his speech, and in doing so she could understand the meaning of Michel's thoughts.
This was the last telepathic message I received.
It is interesting to note that the word “joy” was used to describe sex, and yet some religious texts mistakenly forbid people to have this natural joy [with a person of the opposite sex with whom there is love and spiritual affinity].
I was often confused by Thao using the word “probably” when she spoke to Michel about the possible fate of Arki. Could Arki never have happiness? Over the years and with new life experiences, I realized that it all had to do with the good old saying “never say never”. We do not know the future and therefore it would be a mistake to say that something will happen – even if it is about justice and happiness. My father also often used to say “не загадывать” (not to make plans).
I do not know if I should write it here or not… but after reading the book for the first time, for some reason I thought that I could have been Arki in my past life. Michel Desmarquet was taken by Thiaooubians on June 26, 1987, while I was born on July 30, 1988 – exactly 400 days later. But now, as I am writing this book, I have thrown all those thoughts away. There are many reasons for this, which you may understand later in this book.
I often thought that Natasha could be found using my new knowledge and abilities.
Then I often mentally and aloud addressed my Higher Self, Thao, Biastra and Latoli, asking them to help me at least somehow.
Help came in the form of a dream where I was in a room with another man. He said that Natasha was expelled from the institute and they lost contact with her. I began to hate myself in my dream, saying that I should have helped her and then none of this would have happened. Then I said that perhaps this information would be enough to find her, but then, when I was leaving, I stopped and said that perhaps there might be something else that I could find out since I was already there… I think that a number was written on a piece of paper, possibly a telephone number. Then, when I put on my outer clothes, a note was written saying that Natasha had to work as a prostitute. The man saw the note, and, I think, mentioned the place where she was, and that was the information I was looking for. When I woke up, I could not remember the important to me details of that dream. I was angry with myself for not being able to clear my mind the previous day and for allowing myself to fall asleep in a tense state of being which led to not remembering the number and other details.
Of course, it is not at all a fact that the dream was prophetic or true.
Then I had a dream about Natasha working in an office and wearing something like a light straight dress. While walking on the street, I saw two women wearing the same clothes. Interestingly, both of them entered different banks in my area. I proceeded to those banks, asking the employees some trivial questions in order to better look around and examine the girl, but then I realized that what I was doing was nonsense and I needed to finish that.
I also remembered the Remote Viewing which I tried to learn by following the instructions of the author.[6] I can only say that during my short study of the Remote Viewing I was looking at one of the links, the contents of which I did not know, and I had a clear sensation of warmth appear in the area of my solar plexus. Following the link after my Remote Viewing session, I saw a photograph of the Pyramid of the Sun in Teotihuacan. Unfortunately, due to the noise from the air conditioners that did not allow me to completely relax my mind, I had to postpone the Remote Viewing lessons for a long time.
This is where I stopped my attempts to find Natasha…
Even before I could go to the place where I saw Natasha for the last time, a new pigeon began to fly to my window sill. That new pigeon had a huge growth on his leg, and after a couple of years he did not have both legs at all. I also fed him all this time. Often, he knew that another pigeon was the first to eat the pearl barley, but sometimes fights happened anyway. Sometimes I managed to calm their feelings, and they pecked together… until I turned away.
I had 3 parrots as a child. Unfortunately, they did not live for many years, and because of the problems that started at school, I did not properly care for the last bird. Seeing those two pigeons, I liked that they could remain free and did not live in captivity. But at the same time, they pleased me with their presence every day.
As for the noise situation, in desperation, my mother and I decided to put two-chamber plastic windows in the room and in the kitchen. They cost a lot of money, but we hoped it would reduce noise with the windows closed. Windows did actually reduce the noise by a lot, but not from air conditioners! How could this be?