On July 20, 2015, I went to bed and for a very short time, no more than a second, a vision of a face appeared. After a few seconds, I looked at the clock which showed 12:34 AM.
On August 1, 2015, I wrote a Facebook note about my spiritual experience with Thiaooubians that I had at that time. I decided to do this, because people often asked me about my experience with Thiaooubians, and it was not easy for me to write essentially the same message. They asked me because during previous years I had to write about my experience from time to time in order to answer the questions of some people who doubted the truthfulness of Michel's book. I thought that with such an experience it would be a mistake to be simply quiet during such moments. I wrote “I had to”, because it was not easy for me to tell the truth about myself at that time. I remembered very well how much dirt some people poured on me, which plunged me into a terrible state because of which I sometimes did not go to social networks for weeks, if not months.
The note was published and open to all. Some people believed me, some did not.
Nevertheless, it was a big step forward for me. I began to overcome my fears of telling the truth about myself, learning lessons from a school called planet Earth.
Life brought me another lesson when I went to buy groceries at one of the nearest stores. The woman I used to see at the cash register worked in it. I think that she was a little older than me, and I was a little attracted to her. Then it seemed to me that she was looking somewhat strange at me, and she was saying something to another worker with a smile on her face. But I threw away what I thought at the time was just my speculations. And so that day I was walking around the store and took the groceries into the basket. That woman was putting food on the shelf. She saw me and immediately joyfully ran away somewhere. I went a little further, and then a man with slightly dark skin and short black hair ran out from behind the food shelves. He was clearly looking for me with his eyes, and once our eyes met, the vile smile from his face disappeared. Now it became absolutely clear to me that this was not some kind of speculation of mine. People whom I did not even know and who did not know me really laughed at me. I was not feeling good at heart… not good at all.
Having come home, I realized one thing – I wanted to take a knife, go back to the store, and cut that woman's throat. This is how much I hated her in those seconds of my life. If earlier such thoughts were only fantasies – for which, by the way, one also must pay by suffering according to Universal Law – now I really wanted with my whole being the death of another person who, as I supposed, was the cause of my incredible psychic pain. Moreover, I felt that this act would bring me great pleasure.
Fortunately for her and for me by that time I not only knew about Thiaoouba and the Laws of the Universe, but I also had accumulated a certain amount of spiritual knowledge. I fully realized the seriousness of what was happening. I realized that if I did nothing, then my desire would become a reality. It may seem strange, but I decided to go on YouTube and watch some documentary about killers. I clicked on some video. It was about an old woman from the USA. That woman arranged a shelter in her house for other elderly people whom she then was killing there. Starting to cry in the end due to the wild and unnecessary deaths of people who just wanted help and love, I realized that I still was a human being. I have never had such a serious desire to kill someone ever again.
This was yet another life’s lesson, and I chose to try to learn what it was trying to teach me.
Lessons came not only from real life events. I often had dreams about school and once about the Institute that I barely attended. These dreams are important to me, because they abstractly answered some of my questions, and also helped to realize other important things. I have recorded many of those dreams in detail and will try to briefly tell you about them.
The first such dream was about the Institute. I sat at the desk and I felt very dispirited, as I did not want to be there. The question continued to arise in my head: “What am I doing here? I have already left the institute and do not want to be here. I feel that I do not belong in here”.
In other dreams I was at school. I knew that I had already completed my education in it, but then I chose to return to it again. Again, I had the feeling that I should not be in this place, and I did not want to be there. I felt that I had made the wrong decision when I chose to study in it again. It was a depressive feeling.
In the dream that I had on January 7, 2012, I was again in school class. The teacher yelled at someone, maybe even at me. There were other old problems that I did not need to experience, since I had already gone through that experience. This time I could not tolerate this situation, and so I collected my textbooks, told my friends that I could not go through all this again, got up and… woke up.
The next dream about school, which I wrote down, occurred on February 4, 2014. It was a history lesson. When it ended, we went out into the corridor. Someone was sitting on a bench at the English class, and someone was walking up the stairs to the German class. I did not want to go there, because I did not want to study German. I asked Yan if they were sitting and waiting for the English lesson, as I was thinking of changing the language I was studying. Then my friend Anton, who was sitting at the locker room, congratulated me on something, and I asked him why he did it. For some reason I was wrapped in a blanket. Then we stood on the school porch and discussed why we were attending school again, if we had already finished studying in it? What is the reason? Then I saw how a tram almost run over a crippled crow. I said that we could simply not go to school – not that our previous grades, which we got at the last exams, would be erased. There is no reason why we need to go to school again. Then he pinched my stomach pretty hard. I remembered at that moment Thao, who pinched Michel so that he knew that he was not in a dream. While this was happening, he was saying that “there is a reason, there is a reason for it”. I woke up.
February 16, 2014. In this dream we were going to the technology class. I joked about the waves, and then I sat down at the second or first desk in the second row. I think we were discussing the situation on Earth, and I drew a sketch of the pyramid and said that we do not need to have money in our system. This idea was met with the opposition, and after I continued my thought, talking about the homeless and poor people who are at the very bottom and suffer the most, it caused anger and hatred from my school friend, whose words had an impact on me in ninth grade. I decided that I did not need all this and walked out from the class. The teacher saw this and caught up with me in the hallway. I told him that I was going to change class. He asked what if there would be the same kind of people? And I replied that in that case I would change school. Then I met students from class A and told them my story, and said that I would probably get poisoned (it was so). They promised to talk with my classmates. I walked on and saw our former class teacher give a speech, like a politician, at the main entrance. Next, I walked up the stairs with Vova. I asked him who our new class teacher was, but he did not know. I explained that I was looking for him in order to start going to the English class instead of German. I continued to say that I have no reason to learn German when everything I do is related to English: reading, movies, games, programs that I use. Anticipating the start of the lesson, I noticed the construction of a new building behind the 19th house on our street. I mentioned this to Sergey, and it took him a while to see what I was talking about. (It was also interesting that the German lesson was where computer science lessons actually took place – and I really worked as a programmer for a while. In reality, the German class was on the second floor, right under the informatics class.) The lesson started. Unexpectedly, there were a lot of people, and the teacher was a complete stranger to me. We all entered the classroom, and while I was walking to the third row from the door, I realized that I wanted to sit in the middle row at the second or the third desk on the right side. Because of this, I again had to pass by the teacher. I sat there, and we opened German textbooks which had drawings that were more likely for children than for tenth graders. While the teacher was saying something, I got up with my right hand raised, apologized, and left the classroom with the firm intention not to return there and to start going to the English class from now on. I went down to the first floor, where there were a lot of people. English teacher was probably late. Opening the door to the English classroom, I did not recognize anyone from my class, and I went to see the schedule to find out in which room the English class was taking place.