"Whaes that?"
"Mad noises. Scares hell out of the enemy. Arghh."
"Calm down, General," Remo said, writing down some numbers on a piece of paper. "Here's where you can reach me in case you find out anything. Van Dyne was in on whatever's going on around here, and I don't think he was alone. Do the country a favor and tell me about any leads you get before you tell any more of your majors."
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The general followed Remo to the anteroom, where the WAC was batting her eyelashes and attempting to show Chiun a portion of her thigh. "Let's go," Remo said, and in less than a second the general saw the thin young man who could fight so well and an unknown aged Oriental go out the window and shinny down the sheer face of the building.
"Let me know if you want to enlist," the general called out the window after them. "You can start as a corporal."
t
I
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Five
Toward the end of his descent down the building, Remo's leg brushed against the chest of a tall, leggy redhead. Her two-piece khaki uniform looked like evidence that the modern army had decided to open up a supply room on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills.
"Quite a trick," she said. She looked appraisingly at the smooth wall.
"Something I picked up at summer camp," Remo said.
"You've got a lot of nerve, you know."
"Naah, not really. If you can climb up it, you can climb down it. It's not hard."
"Do not reveal the secrets of Sinanju to outsiders," Chiun cautioned in Korean.
"I didn't mean the wall," the girl said. "I mean you have a lot of nerve copping a free feel like that."
Remo looked around at the expanse of ground surrounding them. "If God didn't want your chest rubbed, he wouldn't have given you enough for two. Anyway, you could have stepped out of the way."
"Then I wouldn't have enjoyed it as much." Her
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r
face broke into a pretty smile. Her eyes were jade green. "Work here?"
"Sort of. See you."
Remo and Chiun turned the corner. The girl ran ahead of them. They brushed past her without slowing. "Hey," she called. "I won't bite. My job is to make visitors feel at home here. Public relations." The breeze blew the scent of her perfume into Re-mo's nostrils. It smelled woodsy and sensual.
"We do not relate to the public," Chiun said.
"That's a beautiful robe," the redhead said, tentatively touching Chiun's kimono. "You can always tell hand-brocaded silk."
Chiun stopped and said, "Remo, don't keep walking while this lady is talking to us." To the woman, he explained, "Rude. He has no manners. Ignore him. The women of my village toiled long to make this robe. It is perfect."
"I can see that. It suits you well."
"The Master of Sinanju always cloaks himself in perfection," Chiun said with a smile.
"What was that about giving away secrets?" Remo asked.
Chiun sniffed at him. "Unfortunately, so few things on the earth are perfect. It can be disheartening for one who seeks after beauty and truth to be surrounded with loutishness and ingratitude."
"How very sad. But the grinding that would wear a lesser stone to nothing only serves to give luster to a diamond."
Chiun beamed. "True. Very true. You are a wise child. She is very wise, Remo. Proof that some whites can think."
"Come on, Little Father," Remo said. "She's playing you like a harp."
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The girl continued, "I didn't make it up. My father always says that."
"Your father is Korean?" Chiun asked.
"I'm afraid not, but he does what he can."
Chiun nodded sympathetically. "He might be nice anyway."
"Well, it's been swell," Remo said, taking Chiun by the elbow. The Oriental yanked his arm away.
"Unhand me, lout," he said. "Do you see how I must suffer at the hands of my ungrateful pupil who ¦does not even recognize a pure spirit when he encounters one? Tell me again, child, about the grinding."
She smiled at Remo. "The grinding that would wear a lesser stone to nothing—"
"My grinding teeth arc wearing away to nothing," Remo said. "Could we at least move away from here? The place'11 be crawling with zombies in à minute."
"That's a great idea," the redhead said. "How about my place?"
"Alas, I must return to our dwelling," Chiun said, "for I am weary from lack of sleep. Perhaps we shall meet again to.discuss other adages of your respected father's." He tottered away, wiping his brow weakly.
"He's precious," the girl said to Remo. "You ought to take better care of that frail old man."
Out of the corner of his eye, Remo saw Chiun walking in a collision course with another of Fort Wheeler's automaton soldiers. When the soldier neglected to give way before the Master of Sinanju, he was flattened into the dirt by Chiun's flailing right hand.
'Til remember to be more gentle with him," Remo said.
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T
"Now how about my place?"
"Thanks, but I've got some work to do."
"Maybe I can help. Try me."
Remo shrugged. "Know anything about a missing chaplain?"
"He was murdered, most likely. Just like the chaplains at Antwerth, Beson, and Tannehill."
"Not bad. What else do you know?"
"I'll tell you in bed, Brown Eyes."
The redhead in the captain's uniform lived off the base in a sprawling ranch house furnished in brass and satin.
"Nice place," Remo said. "I guess army salaries are higher than they used to be."
The girl laughed. "This isn't army issue. Daddy rents my living quarters for me while I'm on the road."
"Then I take it you've been to the other bases where people have been disappearing."
"That's right."
"And you're not in public relations, are you?"
"Army intelligence. I'm here to investigate the same things you are."
"And who's Daddy?"
"Osgood Nooner. Senator Osgood Nooner, the champion of human rights. You've seen him on TV. Your three questions are up."
She unbuttoned her jacket and blouse in front of Remo and stepped out of her skirt easily. Her flesh was creamy, and her red hair fell to her nipples. "I'm Randy," she said throatily as she put her hands on him.
"I can tell."
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"That's my name, silly. Randy Nooner. What about you?"
"Call me Remo," he said, as she led him to a plush bedroom dimly lit by soft pink light.
"I'm glad we know each other, Remo. I never have sex with strangers,"
"It's good to know there are still some women who hold out for a meaningful relationship."
Randy wiggled and pinched and probed and caressed and otherwise irritated Remo, who just wanted her to hold still so he could get the whole boring process over with. Along with not being able to sleep, dream, or sweat, Remo had acquired a problem with women as a result of his training with Chiun. For someone who at one time had drooled at the sight of a pretty tush, Remo's interest in fooling around with girls had dwindled to near nonexis-tence. Sinanju had done that.
Early in his training, Remo had learned the fifty-two steps toward bringing a woman to ecstasy, although he'd never encountered a woman who could hang on past step 11 before coming in a frenzy. His concentrated technique assured him that the women he was with would end up satisfied, but since the same technique left Remo yawning, sex just didn't have the same kick as it used to.
"You're really a beautiful person, Remo," Randy said, squeezing off all circulation to his privates.
"Yeah," Remo said as he touched her in a place beneath her left armpit that sent her into shrieks of pleasure. He was thinking that he hadn't eaten since noon the day before. "Say, is there a grocery store around here?"
He manipulated her calf muscles with a flutter of
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his fingers.. "Oooh," she moaned. "What do you want to eat, baby? Huh? Huh?"
Remo's eyes wandered ceilingward. This one wasn't going to get past step 4. Well, at least it would be out of the way quickly.