“Thanks for inviting me,” Alex said lamely, shrugging out of his sweatshirt and then casting about for a place to put it, while she changed something on her computer that turned the sound down. He settled for tossing it on the bed, and then moved to sit down next to it.
“No,” Eerie said, holding out her hands. “Come here, silly.”
“O-okay,” Alex stammered, picking his way careful across the floor littered with things that looked like they might break if he stepped on one of them, stepping over the pile of discarded candy wrappers that surrounded the couch. Eerie waited for him, her expression blank and ambiguous.
She lay sideways across the cushions, with her head on one arm of the couch and her legs thrown across the other, her shoe dangling from one foot. She wore striped stockings that ran almost all the way to her wrinkled blue skirt, with only a sliver of white skin showing between. The tank-top she wore was blue, with the phrase ‘Fever Ray’ printed across it, which he assumed was a band. One of the her sleeves drooped down her arm, revealing her round, unblemished shoulder. Alex stopped at the edge of the couch, but she reached up and pulled him down onto the couch beside her, tangled up with her in the small space. Alex was so surprised and satisfied that he was afraid to say anything, for fear of messing the situation up somehow.
“Alex, could you move your arm a little bit?” Eerie asked, red-faced. “You are crushing my chest.”
“Sorry!” Alex said, straightening up as a reflex, almost falling off his precarious perch on the edge of the couch before she grabbed him and pulled him close again. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to — I didn’t know where my hands were…”
“It’s okay,” Eerie said softly. “You’re allowed to touch. Just not crush, that’s all.”
“Oh,” Alex said, feeling his cheeks burn. “That’s, uh… I thought maybe you were mad at me.”
“Because you are being all cozy with Emily in class?” Eerie asked, her voice low and musical. “Or because you kissed me and then you didn’t talk to me again afterwards?”
“Well, both, I guess,” Alex said, rolling on to his side so that his head was facing hers, almost uncomfortably close. He could feel the air move when she breathed. “I feel bad about all of it, so I’m pretty sure it couldn’t have made you feel good.”
“No, it didn’t, really,” Eerie admitted. “But I didn’t bring you here to fight.”
“No?” Alex couldn’t keep his disbelief off his face. “Look, I need you to know, Emily is only my friend, whatever she thinks. I… I like you, Eerie.”
“That is good,” Eerie said, putting her finger to his lips. “Now show me how much.”
He tried. There was a long kiss, sometimes deep, sometimes with only their lips touching while Alex struggled to catch his breath. Eerie ran her fingertips under his shirt and down his spine, and it tingled and made him arch his back, pressing himself urgently against her. She kissed him again, pushing her small tongue into his mouth; the taste of blue-raspberry artificial flavoring, and seconds later a wave of euphoria, of disarming excitement and sensation across the broad palette of his senses, pleasure scrawled in neon letters on the walls of his mind. Eerie opened her eyes, and they were close enough that he could see his own reflection there, his own dazed and hungry face. For once, he didn’t have to wonder what she saw. The world spun and danced pleasantly as he lay beside Eerie, pressed together on the small space of the couch.
“Wow. That’s just…”
Eerie laughed, a sound like small glass bells breaking.
“That is how you make me feel,” she said, sounding satisfied. “That is how I know I like you. You can feel it now, too, can’t you?”
“I can,” he admitted, “but I’m not sure what to make of it. It isn’t like before, in San Francisco.”
“We aren’t like before,” Eerie said firmly. “You aren’t.”
Alex lay there, watching little multicolored motes of light consume the ceiling, filling his vision with self-devouring, brilliant fractals. He kissed her neck, and her sweat tasted like honey and the ocean, and her skin smelled of sandalwood. When he touched her thighs, her tights crackled with static electricity.
“Once I am back from field study, will you take me dancing again?” Eerie asked, clinging to him.
“Sure,” he said easily. He would have agreed to anything she asked.
“But this time you have to dance,” she ordered, her eyes sparkling playfully.
“How could I ignore you, Eerie?” He spoke softly, feeling as if the couch were floating on the surface of a gently rocking ocean, as if his hand was trailing along in blood-warm water beside them. “What is wrong with me?”
He wondered if the music was still playing. He felt like it was, but somehow he couldn’t be certain. Eerie sat up, brushing her hair back from her face and looking at him with obvious concern.
“Do you feel better now?”
Alex was about to be confused, about to ask what she meant, when he realized that he did feel better. The heaviness, the confusion, the fog that had been following him for days, so ubiquitous that he had stopped even noticing it, was gone as it quickly as it had come. His head was brilliantly, marvelously clear, washed clean by the euphoria of their contact.
“Holy shit! This is so weird. I must have been half-asleep for days. How could I have not seen it?”
“You didn’t want to,” Eerie said, shrugging, and then laying her head down on his chest. “I don’t blame you. She’s pretty, and you feel guilty every time you see her. That’s okay, but it makes you stupid and easy.”
He should have known. He did know. Of course. How could it have been any other way? Alex remembered Emily holding his hand under the dinner table and felt a little queasy. However, on Eerie’s couch, her head tucked comfortably beneath his chin, her chest moving against his when she breathed, there was no possibility of anger, and there was no implied criticism. He felt shame, but that was entirely his own. Alex realized with startling clarity that the only person he had been failing was himself.
“Oh, God,” he said dully, his lips numb. “Eerie… I told them that I would go on vacation to Anastasia’s place over the break. With Emily.”
“Yeah, I know. Margot told me,” Eerie said, with an unconvincing shrug that he could feel more than he could see. “That’s okay. I have to go do field study in Central anyway, for the whole break. We wouldn’t be able to hang out anyway, even if you stayed. Besides, I trust you…”
“Why?”
He asked the question before he thought about it, and then it hung there, out in the air, in the space that he had suddenly created between them.
“Because I don’t think that I trust myself,” Alex continued hurriedly. “I don’t know even know why I’ve done the things I’ve done recently, and now I find out that maybe they weren’t even my ideas to begin with. What if Emily… What if things get all weird again?”
“It isn’t like that,” Eerie said quietly. “Emily gave you a little nudge, that’s all. She made it easier for you to do what you already wanted to. She is not enough of an empath to make you do something that is actually against your will. Now that you know what she was doing, you should be able to avoid it in the future.”
“Really?” Alex buried his face in her hair. “So, I am an asshole.”
“Sometimes,” Eerie said, her lips brushing his neck. “I like you anyway.”
“Why would Emily try and manipulate my emotions this way? She had to know I’d find out eventually.”
Alex had no idea why he felt compelled to ask the question. Eerie shrugged in response.
“Rebecca might be able to tell you exactly what happened, you should ask her,” Eerie suggested. “Alex is interesting. I’m not the only one who thinks so.”