I smiled – he wasn’t kidding. Lightly running my fingers through his short, chestnut hair, I told him, “It’s not that.”
“Then, what?”
Finding it hard to explain, I released a frustrated sigh. “For so long, I was under the control of Victor” – my deceased Sire and a prick of epic proportions – “and had my every move watched. The weird bastard even chose my clothes; it was part of the control. I didn’t have anything that was mine. So getting a position in the legion…it was the most amazing feeling. Suddenly I had a title, a job, an apartment – things that were mine, and mine alone. So this place is more than just a home to me, and I guess I feel a bit possessive of it since I only got it a few months ago.”
A short pause. “That’s it?”
“Yes.” Even if it didn’t make an awful lot of sense.
He shrugged carelessly. “Fine. I’ll move in here.”
I gaped rather unattractively. “You’re blowing smoke up my arse, right?”
He nipped my lip before sucking it into his mouth. “No.”
“You’d really give up your big, swanky apartment?”
“If you don’t want to move in there with me, yes.”
“But you love your apartment.”
“I love you more, dumb ass.”
Although he didn’t say the words often, there was no doubting that he meant them. It was in his eyes, his tone, his expression. “Thank you for understanding.”
He snorted. “Baby, I’m not that selfless. Maybe you haven’t considered that once we’re living together, I have your body available to me whenever I want it.”
His boyish smile had me smiling back. If I hadn’t seen him fighting during the attack on The Hollow, I would never have believed there was a ruthless, merciless streak to his nature. I’d always thought I’d seen him at his harshest. The first day we’d met, when we duelled during the try-outs, he’d aimed some big bad electric bolts at me. It hadn’t been until the attack, when I saw exactly what he could do with his gift of electrokinesis, I realised just how much he had held back from me.
That night, I’d learned just why so many vampires feared him. He’d killed without blinking, had been almost like a machine. Not once had he hesitated, faltered, or let any of his morals interfere. Not many people could block out their conscience like that. As someone who was still trying to perfect that technique, I was very much aware of how difficult it was.
Touched that he wasn’t pushing me to give up my apartment, even though he probably didn’t get why it was a big deal, I gave him a kiss filled with gratitude.
“If you really want to thank me, you can talk to Antonio about these weird dreams. Please, baby. For me.” He gripped my hips and pulled me tighter to him, making sure I could feel the proof of his arousal. Like I already hadn’t! He seemed to be almost permanently hard, but then, Jared was a randy bastard. Or maybe he just had a gratification disorder. In any case, I saw no need to complain.
“What’s in it for me?”
His devilish smirk surfaced. “The same thing that’s always in you. Exactly where it belongs.”
I sighed at my personal assistant, who had fast become my best friend. His petulant, sulky expression shouldn’t have made him seem more adorable than he already was. Even the indignant look he shot over his glasses made me smile. Watching him type crazily on his work computer, I realised I’d been dismissed.
Perching myself on the edge of his desk, I said, “Fletcher, don’t be an arse. It’s just that I don’t want to look like a slut at my own Binding ceremony. Is that really that much to ask? If I had my way, it would be a small, simple, private event.”
Fletcher – a fellow Brit – was fabulous to go shopping with, but he was never happy unless my cleavage was on show and every curve of my body was accentuated. Not because he was a perv. Being gay, the last thing he was interested in was my body. He was simply determined to get rid of my tomboy look but had taken it to the extreme. Having just heard that he had been secretly working with the designer of my ceremony dress, I had every intention of going to choose something ‘off the rack’ – to his utter horror.
“Sam, luv, you’re going to Bind with the Heir of the Grand High Master Vampire. It isn’t possible to keep something like that private and simple.”
He was right, the smart little shit.
“It’s a good thing that Antonio and his personal assistants are taking care of the plans and not you or there’d be about five people gathered in a garden tent.”
He was probably right about that as well. Actually, I was glad that I didn’t have to worry about things like colour schemes, table centrepieces, and chair covers. I’d be hopeless at it anyway.
“Come on, just trust me on this,” he implored, giving me a pitiful look that was designed to eat at my defences. “I promise the dress is fabulous. And not to be a drama queen or anything, but I think I’ll choke on tears if you reject it again when you haven’t even seen it. I have a very fragile ego.”
“Emotional blackmail? Oh now that’s low.”
“I prefer to think of it as a request said with love.” Pouting, he gave me another pitiful look.
Rolling my eyes, I sighed. “Fine.” It was hard to refuse that cute little face – especially when he had the Keja hypnotic allure. The breath whooshed out of me as, in vampire speed, he was out of his chair and wrapped around me, sniffling.
“I’m getting all emotional here.” Pulling away, he fanned his face as if it would hold back the tears. “You won’t regret it, luv, I swear it.”
“I’m warning you now that if it turns out the dress is slutty, I’ll slash up all your designer clothes.”
He gasped. “You wouldn’t.”
“Oh I would.”
“Now that’s just bitchy.”
I gave him a bright, totally unapologetic smile.
Returning to his seat, he asked, “So…have you decided what to give Jared as a Binding gift yet?”
I groaned. “Don’t remind me.” The tricky thing was that it was tradition for the couple to make each other’s gift. I could just about make a sandwich. Sure, I’d thought about cheating, but then I’d feel like shit when Jared gave me his hand-made gift.
“You’ll think of something.”
I wouldn’t bet on that.
“I’m so excited about all the entertainment for this week. I’ve seen the schedule, and it’s fab. Are you looking forward to the ceremony?”
“Yes. And no. I mean, I’m happy that I’m Binding with Jared, but I’m not looking forward to being the centre of attention. I’m not impressed that I have to spend a week away from training the squad just to have time with snooty Master Vampires.”
“They’re going to test you, luv,” he warned in a grave yet sympathetic voice. “You know that, right?”
“I know. Jared told me.” It hadn’t exactly come as a surprise. They would want to know that when the day came that I ruled alongside Jared, I was capable of protecting them, and that I was someone they could trust, respect, and follow. “I’ll try not to kill any of them.”
Fletcher cocked his head. “It’s not just that that’s bothering you though, is it?”
Again, he was right. It wasn’t that I had my doubts about Binding with Jared. It was that I couldn’t help worrying that he might back out. I had a number of reasons to worry about that. None of which I could talk about right then, because I felt that familiar pull. I felt him.
Turning, I spotted Jared talking to one of the other commanders further along the corridor, just as I’d known I would. As if he felt that same pull, his gaze found mine and he flashed me one of his devilish smirks.