The Cat Who Walked Through Walls

I turned away and was almost to the door when she called out: "Mr. Johnson!"

I stopped, did not turn. "Yes?"

"Come back here!"

"Why?"

Her answer seemed to hurt her face. "The Moderator will see you now."

"Very well." As I approached the door to the inner office, it rolled out of the way... but I did not find myself in the Moderator's private office; three more doors, each guarded by its own faithful hound, lay ahead-and this told me more than I wanted to know about the current government of Hong Kong Luna.

The guardian of the last door announced me and ushered me through. Mr. Mao barely glanced at me. "Sit down." I sat down, rested my cane against my knee.

I waited five minutes while the city boss shuffled papers and continued to ignore me. Then I stood up, headed for the door, moving slowly, leaning on my cane. Mao looked up. "Mr. Johnson! Where are you going?"

"Out."

"Indeed. You don't want to get along, do you?"

"I want to go about my business. Is there some reason I should not?"

He looked at me with no expression. "If you insist, I can cite a municipal ordinance under which you are required to cooperate with me when I request it."

"Are you referring to City Ordinance two hundred seventeen dash eighty-two?"

"I see you are familiar with it... so you can hardly plead ignorance in extenuation of your behavior."

"I am not familiar with that ordinance, just its number. It was cited to me by a clownish thug who crushed into my bedroom. Does that ordinance say anything about breaking into private bedrooms?"

"Ah, yes. Interfering with a safety officer in the performance of his duty. We'll discuss that later. That ordinance you cited is the bedrock of our freedom. Citizens, residents, and even visitors can come and go as they please, subject only to their civic duty to cooperate with officials, elected, appointed, or deputized, in carrying out their official duties."

"And who decides when cooperation is needed and what sort and how much?"

"Why, the official involved, of course."

"I thought so. Is there anything else you want of me?" I started to stand up.

"Sit back down. There is indeed. And I require your cooperation. I am sorry to have to put it that way but you don't seem to respond to polite requests."

"Such as breaking down my door?"

"You weary me. Sit down and shut up. I am about to interrogate you... as soon as two witnesses arrive."

I sat down and shut up. I felt that I now understood the new regime: absolute freedom... except that any official from dogcatcher to supreme potentate could give any orders whatever to any private citizen at any time.

So it was "freedom" as defined by Orwell and Kafka, "freedom" as granted by Stalin and Hitler, "freedom" to pace back and forth in your cage. I wondered if the coming interrogation would be assisted by mechanical or electrical devices or by drugs, and felt sick at my stomach. Back when I was on active duty and repeatedly faced with the possibility of capture while holding classified information, I always had a final friend, that "hollow tooth" or equivalent. I no longer wore such protection.

I was scared.

Before long two men came in together. Mao answered good-moming to their greeting and waved them to seats; a third man came in right after them. "Uncle Jeff, I-"

"Shut up and sit down!" This latecomer was the joker whose gun I had emptied; he shut up and sat down. I caught him looking at me; he looked away.

Mao put aside some papers. "Major Bozell, thanks for coming in. You, too. Captain Marcy. Major, you have questions to ask one Richard Johnson. There he sits. Ask away."

Bozell was a short man who carried himself very erect. He had close-cropped sandy hair and an abrupt, jerky manner.

"Hah! Let's get right to it! Why did you send me on a wild goose chase?"

"What wild goose chase?"

"Hah! Are you going to sit there and deny that you told me a cock-and-bull story about an attack by bandits? In an area where there have never been any bandits! Do you deny that you urged me to send a rescue-and-salvage team out there? Knowing that I would find nothing! Answer me!"

I said, "That reminds me- Can anyone tell me how Aunt Lilybet is this morning? Because I was told to come here, I haven't had time to get to the hospital."

"Hah! Don't change the subject. Answer me!"

I answered mildly, "But that is the subject. In that cock-and-bull attack you spoke of, an old lady was injured. Is she still alive? Does anyone know?"

Bozell started to answer; Mao cut in. "She's alive. Or was an hour ago. Johnson, you had better pray that she stays alive. I have a deposition here"-he tapped his terminal-"from a citizen whose word is above reproach. One of our most important stockholders, LAdy Diana Kerr-Shapley. She states that you shot Mistress Lilybet Washington-"

"What?"

"-while creating a reign of terror in which your actions caused the death by anoxia of her husband the Honorable Oswald Progant, broke the wrist of her husband the Honorable Brockman Hogg, and subjected Lady Diana herself to terror tactics and repeated insults."

"Hmm. Did she say who killed the O'Toole child? And what about the turret gunner? Who killed him?"

"She states that there was such confusion that she did not see everything. But you went outside while the bus was standing still and climbed up to the turret-no doubt that was when you finished off the poor boy."

"Are you saying that last, or did she say it?"

"I said it. A conclusive presumption. Lady Diana was meticulously careful not to testify to anything she did not see with her own eyes. Including this ghostly rolligon full of bandits. She saw nothing of it."

Bozell added, "There you have it, Mr. Moderator. This hijacker shot up the bus and killed three people and wounded two more... and invented a cock-and-bull story about bandits to cover his crimes. There are no bandits in that area; everybody knows that."

I tried to get a grip on reality. "Mr. Moderator, one moment, please! Captain Marcy is here. I understand he got a picture of the bandits' rolligon."

"I ask the questions, Mr. Johnson."

"But- Did he, or didn't he?"

'That's enough, Johnson! You will be in order. Or you will be restrained."

"What am I doing that is out of order?"

"You're disrupting this investigation with irrelevancies. Wait until you are spoken to. Then answer the question."

"Yes, sir. What is the question?"

"I told you to keep quiet!"

I kept quiet. So did everybody else.

Presently Mr. Mao drummed on his desk and said, "Major, did you have more questions?"

"Hah! He never answered my first question. He evaded it."

The Moderator said, "Johnson, answer the question."

I looked stupid-my best role. "What is the question?"

Mao and Bozell both started to speak; Bozell yielded to Mao who went on, "Let's summarize it. Why did you do what you did?"

"What did I do?"

"I just told you what you did!"

"But I didn't do any of the things you said I did. Mr. Moderator, I don't understand how you got into this. You weren't there. That bus is not from your city. I am not from your city. Whatever happened took place outside your city. What is your connection with the matter?"