She couldn’t have made any progress on her book; she would find it even more difficult now. ‘I don’t think so,’ he said.
‘Can’t you work either’ Oh, let’s forget it for today. Let’s walk to the pub and get absolutely pissed.’
At least the return journey would be downhill, he thought, walking. A soft wind tugged at them whenever they passed gaps; green light and shadow swarmed among branches. The local beer was good, he found. Even Di liked it, though she wasn’t fond of beer. Among the Toby jugs and bracketed rifles, farmers discussed dwindling profits, the delivery of calves, the trapping of foxes, the swollen inflamed eyes of myxomatosis. Tony considered asking one of them about the scream, but now they were all intent on the dartboard; they were a team, practising sombrely for a match. ‘I know there’s an ending that’s right for the book,’ Di said. ‘It’s just finding it.’
When they returned to the cottage, amber clouds floated above the sunset. The horizon was the colour of the stone. The field lay quiet and chill. Di gazed at the cottage, her hands light on the wall. After a while he thought of asking why, but her feelings might be too delicate, too elusive. She would tell him if she could.
They made love beneath the low dark beams. Afterwards he lay in her on their quilt, gazing out at the dimming field. The tree was heavy with gathering darkness; a sheep bleated sleepily. Tony felt peaceful, in harmony. But Di was moving beneath him. ‘Don’t squash,’ she said. As she lay beside him he felt her going into herself, looking for her story. At the moment she didn’t dare risk the lure of peace.
When he awoke the room was gloomy. Di lay face upturned, mouth slackly open. Outside the ground hissed with rain beneath a low grey sky; the walls of the room streamed with the shadows of water.
He felt dismally oppressed. He had hoped to paint today. Now he imagined himself and Di hemmed in by the rain, struggling with their baulks beneath the low beams, wandering irritably about the small rooms, among the fat mock-leather furniture and stray electric fires. He knew Di hoped this book would make her more than just another children’s novelist, but it couldn’t while he was in the way.
Suddenly he glimpsed the landscape. All the field glowed sultry green. He saw how the dark sky and even the dark framing room were necessary to call forth the sullen glow. Perhaps he could paint that glimpse. After a while he kissed Di awake. She’d wanted to be woken early.
After breakfast she reread�The Song of the Trees. She turned over the last page of the penultimate chapter and stared at the blank table beneath. At last she pushed herself away from the table and began to pace shortly. Tony tried to keep out of her way. When his own work was frustrated she seemed merely an irritation; he was sure she must feel the same of him. ‘I’m going out for a walk,’ she called, opening the front door. He didn’t offer to walk with her. He knew she was searching for her conclusion.
When the rain ceased he carried his painting materials outside. For a moment he wished he had music. But they couldn’t have transported the stereo system, and their radio was decrepit. As he left the cottage glanced back at Di’s flowers, massed minutely in vases.
The grey sky hung down, trapping light in ragged flourishes of white cloud. Distant trees were smudges of mist; the greens of the field merged into a dark glow. On the near side of the fence the path unfurled innumerable leaves, oppressive in their dark intricacy, heavy with raindrops. Even the raindrops were relentlessly green. Metallic chimes and chirrs of birds surrounded him, as did a thick rich smell of earth.
Only the wall of the garden held back the green. The heavy jagged stones were a response to the landscape. He could paint that, the rough texture of stone, the amber stone spattered with darker ruggedness, opposing the overpoweringly lush green. But it wasn’t what he’d hoped to paint, and it didn’t seem likely to make him much money.
Di liked his paintings. At his first exhibition she’d sought him out to tell him so; that was how they’d met. Her first book was just beginning to earn royalties, she had been working on her second. Before they were married he’d begun to illustrate her work.
If exhibiting wasn’t too lucrative, illustrating books was less so. He knew Di felt uneasy as the breadwinner; sometimes he felt frustrated that he couldn’t earn them more ‘ the inevitable castration anxiety. That was another reason why she wanted The Song of the Trees to sell welclass="underline" to promote his work. She wanted his illustrations to be as important as the writing.
He liked what there was of the book. He felt his paintings could complement the prose; they’d discussed ways of setting out the pages. The story was about the last dryads of a forest, trapped among the remaining trees by a fire that had sprung from someone’s cigarette. As they watched picnickers sitting on blackened stumps amid the ash, breaking branches from the surviving trees, leaving litter and matches among them, the dryads realised they must escape before the next fire. Though it was unheard of, they managed to relinquish the cool green peace of the trees and pass through the clinging dead ash to the greenery beyond. They coursed through the greenery, seeking welcoming trees. But the book was full of their tribulations: a huge grim oak-dryad who drove them away from the saplings he protected; willow dryads who let them go deep into their forest, but only because they would distract the dark thick-voiced spirit of a swamp; glittering birch-dryads, too cold and aloof to bear; morose hawthorns, whose flowers farted at the dryads, in case they were animals come to chew the leaves.
He could tell Di loved writing the book ‘ perhaps too much so, for she’d thought it would produce its own ending. But she had been balked for weeks. She wanted to write an ending that satisfied her totally, she was determined not to fake anything. He knew she hoped the book might appeal to adults too. ‘Maybe it needs peace,’ she’d said at last, and that had brought them to the cottage. Maybe she was right. This was only their third day, she had plenty of time.
As he mused the sluggish sky parted. Sunlight spilled over an edge of cloud. At once the greens that had merged into green emerged again, separating: a dozen greens, two dozen. Dots of flowers brightened over the field, colours filled the raindrops piercingly. He saw the patterns at once; almost a mandala. The clouds were whiter now, fragmented by blue; the sky was rolling open from the horizon. He began to mix colours. Surely the dryads must have passed through such a landscape.
The patterns were emerging on his canvas when, beyond the field, someone screamed.
It wasn’t Di. He was sure it wasn’t a woman’s voice. It was the voice he’d heard yesterday, but more outraged still; it sounded as if it were trying to utter something too dreadful for language. The hills swallowed its echoes at once, long before his heart stopped pounding loudly.
As he tried to breathe in calm, he realised what was odd about the scream. It had sounded almost as much like an echo as its reiteration in the hills: louder, but somehow lacking a source. It reminded him ‘ yes, of the echo that sometimes precedes a loud sound-source on a record.
Just an acoustic effect. But that hardly explained the scream itself. Someone playing a joke’ Someone trying to frighten the intruders at the cottage’ The local simpleton’ An animal in a trap, perhaps, for his memory of the scream contained little that sounded human. Someone was watching him.
He turned sharply. Beyond the nearby path, at the far side of the road, stood a clump of trees. The watcher was hiding among them; Tony could sense him there ‘ he’d almost glimpsed him skulking hurriedly behind the trunks. He felt instinctively that the lurker was a man.
Was it the man who’d screamed’ No, he hadn’t had time to make his way round the edge of the field. Perhaps he had been drawn by the scream. Or perhaps he’d come to spy on the strangers. Tony stared at the trees, waiting for the man to betray his presence, but couldn’t stare long; the trunks were vibrating restlessly, incessantly ‘ heat-haze, of course, though it looked somehow odder. Oh, let the man spy if he wanted to. Maybe he’d venture closer to look at Tony’s work, as people did. But when Tony rested from his next burst of painting, he could tell the man had gone.