Mordecai turned his head and regarded the woman thoughtfully.
Mordecai: The environmental upgrades are no problem. She can install them now, and they’ll travel with her if she decides to leave. But I want those table upgrades. Those are invaluable. I’ll have to talk to her.
“But Princess Donut, it’s the lowest I can go,” Wendita pleaded. “It won’t let me go below 37,500 gold. If we go lower than that, I will have to personally pay the difference myself.”
“Well, how much do you have saved up?” Donut asked. The cat had a wild look to her eyes. “You’ll be free to visit any time you like.”
“Wait, really?” Wendita asked.
Carclass="underline" Donut. Don’t make her pay from her own pocket. It’ll make you look like an ass. Just settle on the price now to get your experience.
Donut: I can get her lower, Carl. I can do it. I can feel her wavering. It is delicious.
Carclass="underline" There’s no need. Open your boxes and you’ll see why.
Donut sighed dramatically. “Oh, we needn’t go lower than 37,500 gold, I suppose.”
“Really?” Wendita said. “So it’s a deal?”
“I’ll have to think on it,” Donut said. She jumped from the counter and moved to the table as the Bopca just stared at her incredulously. Donut started going through her achievements as I returned my attention to my loot.
I put on the necklace, receiving the plus five to my dexterity. I tucked it in under my shirt. We didn’t wear dog tags in the Coast Guard, so I wasn’t used to having something around my neck. It felt heavy against my skin, heavier than it should. I examined Talon Strike, which ended up being a skill, not a spell.
Talon Strike
Birds have ugly feet. Disgusting feet, really. Still, there’s something sensual about the sight of a hawk swooping down upon its prey, talons out, and slashing. It’s so sudden, so unexpected, so explosively violent.
Such violence. Sweet, sweet violence.
Turns the side of your bare foot into a fast-moving slashing weapon, increasing the damage against opponents by up to (Level of skill) times your regular kicking damage for (Level of skill) seconds. Each kick using this skill has a 2% chance to cast the instakill spell Eviscerate. This melee skill has a cooldown of five minutes. Higher levels of this skill increase damage, duration, and chance of casting Eviscerate. A level 15 of this skill will result in Talon Strike being permanently active.
That was an excellent upgrade. Anything that could increase my damage was a welcome addition, especially if it didn’t cost anything to activate. I couldn’t wait to try it out.
I picked up the spell tome.
Bang Bro
Cost: 5 Mana
Target: Temporarily Enchant Equipped Item
Duration: 5 minutes + 1 minute per level of spell. Requires 5 minute cooldown.
Adds both fire and electrical damage to any currently-equipped item. May not be cast on flesh. Well, actually it can be cast on (your own) flesh, but I really wouldn’t recommend it. May inflict Burn and Shock on targets.
Can also be used to cook hotdogs and other items.
I called Mordecai over, who was helping Donut with her items. I showed him the book.
“Will this work on my gauntlet?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Definitely. I wouldn’t try it on your xistera, not with the way you load it. You could probably do it to your foot, also, as long as your invulnerable buff is active. But I would probably avoid doing that. It’s a good spell, and it’s in your mana price range.”
I nodded and read the tome, adding the spell to my list. I would have to add a few points to my intelligence. Between that, Heal, and my Wisp Armor, I now had a few mana-costing spells.
“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, I love it! I love it so much!” Donut cried. “This plus a fan box? I can’t wait!”
She’d gotten the same coupons as me which meant all of us who won that quest probably got the same thing. She’d also received the fan box. But other than that, she hadn’t gotten as many boxes as I had. Most notably, she hadn’t received the Tyrant box nor the Assassin box. But she did have the boss box and the quest boxes. It looked as if she’d received a bunch of random scrolls and some useless items we’d have to sell, But in one of those, I wasn’t sure which, she’d also received a new tiara.
It poofed onto her head. It looked similar to her last one. The jewels on this one were white instead of purple. I quickly examined it. It wasn’t as good as the one she’d lost, but it did come with some good benefits.
Enchanted Tiara of Mana Genita
A crystal tiara fit for royalty. Made in honor of all the lost children of the world. Because nothing helps sooth the tears of grieving parents like watching someone else dress up all fancy.
+3 Intelligence
Increased ability to detect mobs on the map.
Removes automatic hostility by worshippers of Mana Genita.
“Who’s Mana Genita?” I asked.
“She’s a goddess,” Mordecai said. “A pretty obscure one. I don’t think I’ve ever run across her. She was big on spells, I think. I don’t remember. There’s thousands of them. Gods, I mean. Only a few are dungeon regulars. Most of them never leave the 12th floor.”
I remembered what Odette had said about Mordecai and gods. He has a lot of experience in the subject, unfortunately.
“Yeah, I’m supposed to ask you about gods,” I said.
“That can wait. It’s a long conversation. We need to get our space set up. And then sleep. So distribute your points.”
“Wait, that reminds me,” Donut said, jumping from the table. She rushed to the corner of the restaurant. Standing there, hidden in the shadows was a mailbox. I’d forgotten about that. She had a spellbook coming to her. She leaped to the top of the box and opened it up. A moment later, she grunted with annoyance.
“When am I going to get a good spell?” she complained. “The flames from Magic Missile aren’t doing it for me anymore. I want something with some kick. Like Fireball.”
The idea of Donut shooting fireballs was terrifying.
The cat scrunched up her face. “What do you think, Mordecai? Should I read it? Or maybe we can sell it?”
“Read it,” he said.
She glowed.
“What was it?” I asked. Normally, she’d apply the book without even reading the description first. I was moderately impressed that she’d first asked Mordecai’s opinion. But thinking on it, I was starting to suspect she was getting addicted to the idea of selling things more than actually using them.
“It’s a spell called Hole,” Mordecai said. “It does exactly what it sounds like. It makes a temporary hole on a surface of her choosing. She’ll need to level it up before it’s too helpful, as a level one isn’t thick enough to get through most doors, but it’s a useful spell. Especially if you’re creative with it.”
That actually sounded pretty awesome. I could already think of a half dozen uses for it. Tomorrow we would have to go out and experiment. I turned to Katia.
“What about you? Did you get anything good?”
She nodded, lifting her left arm. There was nothing there except the arm of her blue tracksuit. Any equipped gear would be invisible on her, but it would increase her mass.
“It’s an arm bracer that I can turn into a shield,” she said. “Check it out.”
She flicked her wrist, and her arm changed shape, forming into what looked like a buckler-sized glob of blue polyester.