“Can I join you?”
I jumped at the sound of Mr. Clermont’s voice. “Of course.”
He took a seat next to me in one of the pool chairs and stared out toward the ocean. We were both quiet for a few moments before he finally spoke.
“You’ve had an eventful few months since you moved to Clermont Bay.”
“You can say that again.” I snuggled into my blanket and watched him.
He looked so much like Beck, or I guess Beck looked like him. His usually clean-shaven face was covered in salt and pepper stubble, and he looked so peaceful. Like he hadn’t had time to consider the rest of the world and their problems.
“I’m sorry about your father.”
I winced. “Beck told you?”
“He did.” He nodded and looked over in my direction. “He’s scared that what he did is going to force you to leave.”
I thought about what he said, and he was right. There was a good chance it would force me to leave because I had no other choice. There was no way in hell I was going to stay in that house with him. I hated it there before, but now? I didn’t think I could come to terms with everything he was doing.
Especially with her.
And how was I supposed to look Amelia in the face and not tell her the truth? It wasn’t something I was capable of, and once I got the deed to my mother’s house, it wasn’t something I was willing to live with.
“He’s right.” I nodded and stared down at the calm pool water. “I don’t think I can go back to living with my father, but he’s supposed to be giving me my mom’s house back. I will figure everything out."
"What about school?" His question wasn't condemning. It was as if he had genuine curiosity about what my plans were.
"I don't know." I answered honestly as I shrugged my shoulders.
"Hopefully, I can finish back home, or I'll have to get my GED. I'm not sure."
He nodded his head and sipped from his coffee, and for a moment I thought he was finished talking to me. The silence rode out before he finally said, "Both of my children will be really upset if you leave, and as their father, it is my job to ensure their happiness."
I knew he wasn't intending for them to, but his words were like a stab in the chest. He was right. That was what a father should do. "I'm not sure both of them will be upset. Frankie, yes, but surely you'll let her come visit me."
"I'd be much more likely to let her visit you if you stayed in the pool house." He tipped his coffee in the direction of the pool house that stood to the right of their pool. It was small in comparison to their massive home, but
it was probably still bigger than the house my mom and I shared.
"What?"
"That is if you want your privacy. You're more than welcome to stay in the house with us. We can fix up the room next to Frankie's for you."
"Mr. Clermont, I can't stay here." I couldn't wrap my head around what he was saying.
"You most certainly can." He turned to face me more fully. "I know that my son has made some really poor decisions when it comes to you. Really stupid decisions, as a matter of fact, but he cares about you."
I shook my head, because Mr. Clermont was wrong. I thought that Beck had cared about me too, but he wasn't there at school when he treated me like I was disposable. After everything at the cabin, he had just pretended like I meant nothing.
"He does." He tried to reassure me.
"Your son likes to play games. That's all I am to him."
"Did he tell you that your father threatened him?" I sat up straight at his words and he nodded his head. "Right after you all got back from your cabin trip that I didn't know you were going on, by the way." He tapped my armrest with a smile. "Your father threatened to take things from you if Beck didn't keep his distance. He was using whatever leverage he had over you to keep Beck away."
"That's why he was pushing me away?" I asked out loud, but I was talking more to myself.
"Mmhmmm." Mr. Clermont took another drink of his coffee. "I didn't say he was making smart decisions. He should have just come to you and told you about your father, but he was doing what he thought was best for you."
He studied me for a moment before speaking again. "He told me all of this last night, but he also told me something I'm not sure I should tell you."
"What's that?" My chest felt tight, and I wasn't sure if I could handle anything else.
"He told me that he's in love with you."
I opened my mouth to argue, but Mr. Clermont held up his hands. "My son may do a lot of things, but this isn't something he says lightly. If he says he's in love with you, I believe him. But I didn't need to hear him say it to know. His mom and I have known for a few weeks now."
I shook my head because I didn't know what I was supposed to say. Beck loved me? I knew that what I felt for him was beyond anything I had ever felt
before, but it was so hard to understand.
"Now, my question is do you love him?" He asked the question like my answer was simple. But it wasn't. The answer to that question was earthshattering and confusing and beyond overwhelming.
"I don't know."
"Yes. You do." He looked at me with so much sympathy in his eyes. "It's just hard to say it out loud. I remember when I realized I was in love with Beck's mom." He chuckled as he rubbed his chest. "It hit me like a ton of bricks, but I was so damn scared to say it to her. It took me far longer than it ever should have, but every time I was with her or I thought about her, I had this feeling in my chest that I just couldn't brush off. I was so damn obsessed with her."
I thought about all the times I was with Beck and when I thought about him, which was always, and I knew the exact feeling he was talking about.
"Yes." I nodded my head. "I'm in love with your son."
Mr. Clermont's smile took over his warm face. "Then that's the only thing that matters. Everything else can be worked out."
"Mr. Clermont, I really appreciate you offering to let me stay here, but I don't know that it's the best idea. I don't think I can afford this place," I pointed to the pool house, "and I don't want to be a bother to you all."
"I didn't ask you to rent it, Josie. I told you that you can stay there, and you could never be a bother."
"But…" I didn't get to finish my argument because the sliding door opened behind us, and both of us turned around to find Beck coming outside.
He was watching me with a guarded look on his face, and the urge to get up and kiss him was overwhelming.
The cabin felt like weeks ago, and I felt like I hadn't touched him in far too long. But Cami had, and I wanted to wash every bit of her off of him. It was irrational, but I hated that she had ever touched him at all.
"I think you two need to talk about some things." Mr. Clermont stood and patted me on my shoulder before he passed his son and walked back into the house.
I sat there in the quiet peace of the morning as the sun rose, and I stared at Beck. He looked so hesitant as he approached me. So unsure.
"Hi." He took the seat next to me and didn't move his gaze away from me for a moment.
"Hi."
"Did you sleep okay?" He ran his fingers through his unruly hair.
"I did. What about you?" I pulled my knees up against my chest and wrapped my arms around them.
"Not really." He chuckled. "I was a bit worried about you."
"You didn't have to worry. I'm okay."
"Are you?" He searched my face, and I knew he was looking for some sign that I was about to break.
I shrugged my shoulders because I didn't really know. In this moment, I felt okay. I felt like I could breathe and that the rest of the world wasn't crashing down around me, but I knew that I wouldn't feel that way for long. I was going to have to face the real world, and I was going to have to make decisions that would affect the rest of my life.