“Are we going somewhere?” In my ears, the question rings like a squeal.
“Perhaps” is all that Nurse Nookes replies.
Nurse Nookes rushes through the buttons. Then she orders me to sit down, and quickly pulls fur-lined boots on my feet. She squats down before me again. I look past her, at the shadows hiding in the corners.
“There, there.” She gently pinches my cheeks. Her voice is cheery, but I don’t think she feels that way. “I believe you are ready.”
Before I can reply, a knock comes from the door. There is nothing cheery or timid about this one. Rather, it sounds… furious. I know it then for sure. This is a nightmare.
“We’re coming!” Nurse Nookes shouts, but it seems to me she’d prefer to curse. She strides to the door and waves at me to follow.
The shadows hover hesitantly in the corners. They want to come with me. I don’t know what to do.
Nurse Nookes is about to open the door just as whatever horrendous creature waiting behind it knocks again, louder. At the moment that she’s not looking at me, I lift my hem and beckon to the shadows. “Quick, now.”
“Yes, quick.” Nurse Nookes pulls the door open.
The shadows dash to hide in my hem. They settle against the wool in an eyeblink, becoming mere darker patches. After all, shadows don’t have bodies.
I rush out from my chambers and step into the nightmare.
Six soldiers in midnight blue guard both ends of the hallway. I don’t recognize any of the men, whose faces are hard as if chiseled with an ax and whose gazes dart from door to door as if they were expecting trouble. They clutch at the straps of their rifles or the pommels of their viciously curving swords. Curiously, their gloves are red.
As I rub my eyes, a bearded guard strides the length of the corridor. He’s the furious knocker, and there is no mercy in his knuckles as he pounds in turn on the doors of Merile, Sibilia, and Elise. He stops by Elise’s door, doesn’t continue to knock on Celestia’s. Why?
One by one, my sisters emerge from their rooms, but not one of them bears the same expression.
Elise waltzes to the hallway in a gleaming white ball gown that glitters with sequins and pearls. Her smile is the widest I’ve ever seen, and as she dances toward me she’s akin to a dove released from its cage.
Sibilia pushes her head through the door crack. Her red-gold hair, though braided, sticks out in all directions, and her cheeks glow. “What under the Moon is happening here?”
Elise pulls the door open and grabs Sibilia by the elbow. “It’s the time, at last. Come!”
Sibilia stumbles after her, a silver hand mirror in her free hand. She’s still in her nightgown. Her feet are bare.
None of this makes sense. If this isn’t a nightmare, then nothing is. I pinch my arm before Nurse Nookes can stop me. It doesn’t help, and Nurse Nookes doesn’t notice me trying again either. Two of the soldiers have formed a barrier behind Elise and Sibilia. There is no turning back, no returning to our rooms.
Merile’s door swings open last. Her beautiful dogs burst out, unclothed still. My sister dashes after them in her gorgeous fur-trimmed cloak, a dog coat in each hand. “Rafa, Mufu, stop! My darling dears, you’ll catch a cold!”
“Rafa…” I kneel before I remember the shadows hiding in my hem. As I embrace Rafa, the shadows shy away from her. Mufu bounces to lick my face. “Oh, Mufu!”
Then Merile is there, tugging the coats over their heads and fastening them under their bellies. Rafa and Mufu must have smelled the shadows at last, for they sniff at my hem and their thin tails wag wildly.
“Let’s get going, then,” the bearded soldier grunts. I glare at him. Who does he think he is to order a Daughter of the Moon!
I’m not the only one who is shocked. Sibilia’s face flushes with fury. She brandishes the mirror at the soldier. “In my nightgown?”
But Elise flings an arm around Sibilia. She whispers something I can’t quite hear in her ear. All color drains from Sibilia’s face. She says, “But of course. We shouldn’t keep Mama waiting.”
The guards lead us through the silent palace. Down the stairs to the second floor. Through corridors lit by duck-soul lanterns. Past curtained windows. I tremble, want to turn back, want to wake up. But Nurse Nookes ushers me onward.
We make it halfway to the sacred observatory without a word said. If you don’t count Rafa’s and Mufu’s occasional barking and Nurse Nookes’s heavy breathing. This silence weighs my steps like a wet cloak with its hood pulled up. I want to toss it aside.
“Sibs…” I tug at the sleeve of my sister’s nightgown. “Why do you have a mirror with you?”
Elise giggles, the only one of us who’s merry. “Yes, do tell us why?”
Color rises to Sibilia’s cheeks in tides of red. “I was practicing… No, what do you think? I woke up to this wretched knocking, and it was the first thing I found in the dark.”
“Be quiet,” the guard striding behind us orders. His breath smells of raw onions.
Sibilia glares daggers at him, irritated. “Why?”
The guard runs his fingers down the strap of his rifle. “For your own safety.”
Nurse Nookes hastens to my side to shield me from the guard, and seeing her afraid makes me even more so.
We walk the rest of the way in utter, frozen silence. Even Rafa and Mufu refrain from yapping.
The guards halt as we come to the white crescent stairs leading to the sacred observatory. Elise strides up the stairs without hesitation, dragging Sibilia with her. Merile limps after them with her dogs. But I hesitate to follow.
“Nookes…” I tug at her arm, so strong and familiar amidst all the strangeness. This doesn’t feel like a dream anymore, not even like a nightmare. Everything feels too real. “Nurse Nookes, I’m afraid.”
Elise draws to a halt, and so do my other sisters. They stare at me. Are they embarrassed of me, or just worried?
“Don’t be,” Nurse Nookes replies. “I’ll come with you.”
But the bearded guard that smells of raw onions places a heavy hand on her round shoulder. He, too, wears a glove as red as if it were dipped in blood. “Only the daughters may enter. That is the order we follow.”
I burst into tears then. “I want to wake up! I want to wake up now!”
“Oh dear…” Nurse Nookes glares at the bearded guard. The rest of the soldiers have formed a chain around us. The only way out is up the stairs. This can’t have escaped Nurse Nookes, but she doesn’t seem to care about that. She embraces me with both wobbly arms. “Little Alina, listen to me: sometimes in life you must be very brave. And tonight is one of those nights. You are a Daughter of the Moon. You are blessed by his wisdom and strength. As long as you remember that, nothing in this world can harm you.”
But it sounds to me as if she’s the one swallowing tears. And suddenly I don’t want to be comforted by her, but to comfort her! Her heart knows only kindness. But, I fear, after tonight, it will be full of sorrow.
“Nothing can harm me,” I whisper in Nurse Nookes’s ear. My skirts shift, I feel it. One of the shadow animals, the owl, is moving. It slips out from under my hem, against Nurse Nookes. I know, just know, that it will look after my… my friend. “Nothing can harm you.”
A clack of boots against marble comes from the direction of the stairs. I let go of Nurse Nookes just in time to see a soldier I at last recognize by name. Captain Janlav halts on the second-to-last step and lashes a question at the guards. “What is the meaning of this delay?”
The guards all stare at me. I’m an excuse for them. I… I will not be afraid. I wipe the tears from my eyes. I won’t cry more. No matter what.
I hurry up the stairs, past the soldier to my sister, without as much as glancing over my shoulder. I can feel Nurse Nookes watching me, her gentle heart swelling with sadness and pride.