Alicia halted their tumble, dragged him up by the vest, and threw him past her. Drake yelled in alarm as he smashed into what felt like a solid brick wall.
“Moving on is what it is,” Alicia shouted in his face. “But I never move on. Not in here.” She jabbed at his forehead. “In here I’m still fifteen and having the shit scared out of me every day. In here I’m always facing a drunk with quick fists and trying to prove that I’m not scared. That’s how I am. That’s me. How do I get past that?”
She threw a clenched fist at him. Drake dodged and her knuckles struck brick.
“Ow!”
Drake ducked around her, gaining a little space. As he moved he took stock of their surroundings. Above, a small V of sunlight revealed how far away the top of this narrow valley was, before it vanished in the face of the ongoing storm. Sand rained down onto his face, hair and shoulders in a constant shower. All around stood what remained of a small, tumbledown structure, an old gray, brick-built shelter, its walls short and stubby and its roof all but caved in. Drake darted into the ruins, happy to have a wall at his back.
Alicia stalked him, her face twisted with memories, her eyes wild and crazy. Drake was under no illusions that survival meant weathering this particular personal storm.
“Come home, Alicia.” He simply spoke the words in his heart. “Stop running.”
His words stopped her, brought a smoothness to her features. But terrible memories are like deep wounds, deep loss, they never truly repair, and they struck back now, sending Alicia into even deeper despair. She punched and kicked Drake, exploring his defenses and then getting around them, injuring his knee and smashing a tooth so hard that it fell to the sand — more blood staining the ground. Alicia stared at it as though she were staring her dead father right in the eyes once more — something she had never managed to do.
“This is all we should be,” she said in a damaged voice. “Blood and bone, teeth and flesh. Not memory and feeling and opinion. I don’t want that.”
“Then accept it,” Drake said harshly. “You lived it. You lived through it. Accept that one of the worst enemies you have ever discovered was your own father. It’s better to mold that memory into fire and grist and desire and purpose than to try to ignore it. Better to accept and live. Every day.”
Alicia looked spent, consumed, but that didn’t stop her unleashing a violent attack. She slammed his shoulder against the brick wall at his back. The wall wavered and then collapsed, sending up a plume of mortar. Alicia was on him, bearing down hard amidst the tumbling bricks. They rolled, striking another wall, which also crumpled under their combined weight. They bowled through the rubble. Drake regained his footing, grabbed Alicia and threw her against an outer wall. The entire structure wobbled. Drake then tried to pull her to safety, but she pushed him away.
“C’mon, tough guy,” she said harshly. “Fight me if you can.”
And then he saw it. Finally, he saw it. Crap, he was slow but she was projecting the memory of her father onto him for the duration of this fight, this explosion, and he was fighting back. Not good. Against all of his instincts he realized he had to let her win.
“You think you’re good enough,” he said. “Prove it.”
She came like a devil, a whirlwind. Fists struck him left and right and on top of the head, jarring his skull bones and bruising his cheeks no end. A knee caught him in the stomach and he was down on his knees. Gripping his shoulders she threw him against the outer wall and it disintegrated all around him, bricks and mortar raining down and bouncing off his shoulders. Still, he knelt there, moaning. Alicia boxed the side of his head, and he collapsed. She stomped at his ribs, making him wheeze. A hand was the only thing holding him up and then she stepped hard on the fingers.
Drake was down among the sand and rubble of the collapsed shelter. Alicia grasped the edges of the last remaining wall, heaved, and pulled it so that it fell on top of him. Blood splashed across his vision. Stars shone like a frenetic Milky Way. Blackness enshrouded all that he knew and saw.
“Die.” He heard the familiar voice only a millimeter from his face. “I never got to see you die and I’ve been running ever since. Are you still in there?”
Drake remained silent and swam with the darkness. Then he felt Alicia pulling him out from under the wreckage.
“You don’t die that easily, bastard.”
A boot to the groin sent him backward against the sharp slope of the valley where he stayed, barely able to stand.
“Open your eyes.”
He felt no surprise to see the pistol leveled at his throat.
“Say your last prayer.”
“In the end…” he managed to croak. “I want you to take your future by the fucking balls and live it, Alicia. Live it while you still have time.”
Her eyes widened, the tangle of lines across her forehead eased. He knew that he had gotten through, but only as the figure of her nightmare vision. He also knew that it wouldn’t save his life.
The gunshot filled his brain.
CHAPTER THIRTY NINE
Drake felt blood on his cheek, across his chin. The impact had been close enough to his right ear to render a temporary deafness. As he opened his eyes he saw that Alicia had averted the barrel beyond the very last instant, unable to move it more than a few millimeters. The slug had seared his temple.
“Fuck me.”
“Stay there. I’m not done with you yet.” Alicia’s voice was as hard and lethal as the weapon she held. Drake experienced a sudden bone-deep fear. Did she just miss?
He had more work to do. “Inside, you know it’s over. Done. You know now that there is a way to move on.”
That stopped her cold. “There is?” He could see the conflict within her. “Well, maybe. What do you mean?”
“Drake,” he said, holding out his arms as best he could. “Matt Drake.”
“Wha…?” Alicia focused for the very first time, eyes upon the present rather than encrusted with the past. “What are you saying?”
“You want me to spell it out? Then fight me first.”
He took the gamble of his life and came at her slowly, swatting the pistol aside and then ducking so that he could lift her free of the ground. She struggled, but only lightly. The raw fury, along with much of her energy, had been depleted. Drake hefted her, dropped a shoulder and deposited her as gently as possible onto her back, amongst the sand and rubble. Alicia could certainly take it.
“It’s time to move on for good. And by that I mean stop. No more running, no more looking for the next adventure. It’s time to live in the present and embrace all it has to offer.”
Alicia sighed, struggling now but barely able to move. Drake sank down onto her legs as she managed to flip over onto her stomach, and a smile broke free through the blood and grime that coated his face.
“Now we live our lives,” he said. “We live them together. You don’t forget your past, Alicia, you accept that it happened and build a better future.”
Alicia struggled, but gently. Drake finally laughed and reached forward. He tapped out a rock tune on her ass and thighs to help lighten the mood. Alicia managed to lift her head.
“Quit that.”
“Why? It is turning you on?”
“No. I can’t guess the bloody tune.”
Drake enjoyed himself some more. “Smoke on the Water, silly.”
“I think I’d prefer Paranoid. More rhythm.”
“Oh? Well, we’ll try that later.” Drake turned serious and climbed off, careful to completely ignore all the hurts that ransacked his body. Still wary, he eyed his oldest friend.