“I did not wish to do that so as to remain safe. Would you have lain with other men in order to protect yourself?”
“No!” Her hands came down and her head up, Mari glaring at him. “That’s different. Completely different.”
“Why?”
“Because…” Her glare deepened. “Because it is. But it doesn’t matter now.”
Alain frowned slightly, the visible reaction reflecting his extreme level of puzzlement. “You are angry with me because I did not lie with other women.”
“No. You are completely missing the point. Just forget it. What happened after you turned down all of the Mage Guild’s sluts?”
He did not understand Mari’s reactions at all, but decided that pursuing the question would definitely not be along the path of wisdom. “I went to Alexdria, where I joined with the military force under the command of General Flyn, neither of us knowing that the fate of our mission had been already decided. Now you and I both know of the recent past of each other. What will you do, Mari?”
She licked her lips nervously. “Give thanks that you survived, thanks that this general was the commander of the Alexdrians, and thanks that I made it here when I did. After that? More data. I need more data. Exactly what is going on and why?”
“You seek to learn more of the oncoming storm?” Alain asked, thinking of the vision he had seen.
“Storm?”
“The danger,” Alain said, casting his voice lower. “The chaos that threatens all this world. We spoke of it in Dorcastle, and you said you knew all about it, and what your role was to be.”
“Oh,” Mari said. “That stuff. Rioting in the cities, and random attacks by commons, and disproportionate actions by my Guild, and what’s still happening in Tiae? As for my role, I know something must be done, but I don’t know how to do it. I want to talk to Professor S’san. I found out that she’s gone to live at Severun in retirement, so I’m going to go there and ask some hard questions and not leave until I get some decent answers.” Mari looked down, her clasped hands twisting uncertainly.
“But Severun is deep within the Empire, and you cannot travel as a Mechanic if your Guild is searching for you,” Alain objected. “A common without travel papers trying to enter and journey through the Empire will face many difficulties and dangers.”
She still did not look at him, her face lowered. She brushed back her hair with one hand. “I’ve got some fake travel papers.”
“It will still be very dangerous, Mari. But if you believe this must be done to fulfill your task, then I will do all I can to protect you.”
Her head shot up and Mari stared at him. “Really? You’ll come along? I didn’t want to ask. It’s too much to ask of you.”
“If a friend is someone who helps, surely one who cares much more for another does even more,” Alain said. “I only parted from you in Dorcastle because it seemed the best way to protect you from harm. I will not willingly leave you again. And I must assist you in what you seek to do.”
Mari seemed to be trying to avoid crying, even though she was also smiling. “Alain, it’s not something you must do. It’s your choice, though I don’t deny I am very happy with it.” Mari paused, then spoke with careful control. “Please think about it before you commit to this, Alain. It will be very dangerous for you.”
“Dangerous?” Alain asked. “My Guild already seeks to kill me. It would have already succeeded if not for you. But most important is ensuring your safety as best I can, and helping you to do the right thing. I will not leave your side again, I will assist what you seek to do, and I will not allow harm to come to you while I live. I do not have fake travel papers, though.”
Mari looked embarrassed. “Actually, Alain, I have a set of fake travel papers for you, too. I was hoping…”
“You should have known this, Mari, that I would help you.”
She was smiling again as she wiped her eyes. “Maybe I should have known. But I didn’t, Alain. You are a Mage, and sometimes my memories of what happened in the Waste and in Ringhmon and at Dorcastle have seemed like some kind of hallucination. I didn’t know how you would react when I found you. I was actually… Alain, I was afraid that when I found you I’d discover that you’d gone back to being like you were when we first met. That you’d just look at me as if I didn’t exist and walk away. I should have realized that wouldn’t happen. I should have known that you’d help without question. You keep saying that truth doesn’t exist, but you are true. There’s nothing false about you.”
He felt very good at that moment, better than he could recall feeling in his entire life. “You will sleep beside me tonight?” Alain asked.
She looked surprised, then breathed a laugh. “I don’t know exactly how you mean that, but the answer is no. We maintain our distance, Sir Mage, so that our desires don’t get the better of our brains. You said that you’re safer with me around, and I feel the same way about you. Just like before, whatever one of us can’t handle, the other one can deal with. But I won’t feel safe sleeping right next to you because I’m not sure that either one of us can handle that the way we should.”
“You are right,” Alain agreed.
“There. You told me that I’m right again. You may not have great social skills, but you know what to say to a woman.” Mari reached over and retrieved her cup of stew, sipping at it. “It’s cold. Yours must be, too. Sorry.”
Alain picked up his and finished it off quickly. “Between the fire and your presence, I am warm enough.”
She gave him a disbelieving look. “Who told you that line? Some of the soldiers that you’ve been hanging around with?” In the distance, the calls of the sentries sounded, reporting that all was still well. “I’m glad they’re around us now, though. It’s been a little scary sleeping out here alone.” Mari made a face. “Blazes, it’s been scary for months, every time I wanted to sleep, not knowing what might happen while I was sleeping. I could put wedges under my doors to keep out commons or Mechanics, but thanks to you I knew those wouldn’t slow down Mages. I just had to hope the Mage Guild had lost track of me, too.”
“Do you wish me to stay awake and keep watch?”
“Stars above, no. I can see how tired you are. Just having you near will be enough.” She sighed, giving him a longing look. “But not too near. My physical charms might be too much for you, your touch might be too much for me, and then, hey, you’d be ensnared and I’d be worrying about maybe having to knit baby booties.”
“I believe that I already am ensnared,” Alain suggested.
“As long as you mean that in a good way. Alain, I’m exhausted. Do you mind if I lie down now? We can talk more in the morning.” Mari wrapped herself in her blanket and lay down a good arm’s length out of reach of him, though close enough to the fire to stay warm as the night air cooled. She blew him a kiss, her eyelids drooping, then closed her eyes, a slight smile on her lips. Mari must have been as tired as Alain, falling asleep within moments, but her smile remained in place.
He wondered how hard she had ridden to catch up with him and the Alexdrians. From what he had seen of her on horseback here and in the Waste near Ringhmon, Mari was not a natural rider. She must have suffered on that ride, but she had stayed in the saddle until she reached him.
Despite his own weariness, Alain remained sitting, watching her a while, seeing Mari’s face relaxed in sleep, the gentle rhythm of her breathing bringing a sense of great comfort. He sat under the stars, absorbed in wonder at the marvels of this illusion others called the world, letting feelings he had once forgotten fill him.
She loves me.