Katsuya had no interest in horseracing. He only ever went along if his friends invited him, and even then only for the big races. For him to get off here, that could only be interpreted as Katsuya being hurtful to Misa.
As the grandmother–granddaughter pair stood waiting to get off, the older woman was trying to soothe the girl, who was still sniffling.
Katsuya made a point of mouthing the word ‘bitch’ at the woman. The implication being that this too was because of Misa.
‘Hey, I’m sorry, it’s my fault. I’ll stop. Will you change your mind and come to the broker with me?’
The train came to a halt and the doors opened. Misa tried to prevent Katsuya from getting off, but instead she got dragged along.
‘Eek!’
Misa came close to tripping over onto the platform but Katsuya didn’t even turn around, he just shook off her hand and hurried over to the ticket gate.
Any impulse to chase after him vanished, and Misa just watched him go.
Ugh, how did we get to this point?
They argued when they were out on a date, when they were at home in Katsuya’s apartment, and if she wasn’t careful, even after they’d just done it.
Just what was wrong? Why was it that the most insignificant comment would always escalate into a full-blown argument? Things would go beyond the point of no return, and if they were at his place he’d hit her, or if they were out he’d lose his temper and walk off. Misa had lost count of the times she’d had to make her own way home in tears.
And yet, when he had been in a good mood, he’d suggested they live together, rather than each living alone, since it would save them both money on rent.
I think you and I will get along just fine, he’d said.
Still, whenever his anger flared up he was relentless. No matter how much Misa pleaded and cried, no matter how much she apologized, it had no effect. Once an argument had begun, it wasn’t over until he decided it was.
She and Katsuya had been the first ones off the train, and the other passengers stepped off after them. By now Misa was used to the pitying stares.
The sound of someone blowing their nose echoed loudly. Misa reflexively turned to look – it was the same pair from before. The elderly lady was helping the little girl to clean herself up after crying.
‘I’m sorry for making your granddaughter cry.’ Misa couldn’t help but offer an apology.
With a practised hand, the old lady briskly disposed of the tissue and uttered flatly, ‘That good-for-nothing.’
It took a moment for Misa to realize that the woman’s offhand comment was in reference to Katsuya.
The shock of it was a rude awakening to Misa – the fact that she was dating a guy whom a total and complete stranger felt compelled to dismiss aloud as a good-for-nothing.
‘Have you thought about getting rid of him? For all he puts you through.’
The old lady spoke in a frank tone as she took the hand of her granddaughter, no longer crying, and descended the staircase towards the opposite exit.
Misa watched their retreating figures until they were no longer visible, then trudged along the platform to a nearby bench, where she took a seat.
Why am I dating such a jerk?
An insignificant comment escalated into a full-blown argument and, in his anger, he saw nothing wrong with yelling at her in public; if no one was around, he became violent, without any concern that he might actually injure her.
Their relationship had begun with him chatting her up. Katsuya was a good-looking guy, and Misa had been flattered when he had struck up a conversation with her. She agreed to go to a café with him.
As they talked, it turned out that they both attended universities along the same railway line, and what’s more, while they had both grown up in the Kansai region, the commute to campus from home was too arduous, so they were both living on their own.
Things progressed quickly from there. They exchanged mobile phone numbers that same day, and within a month, their relationship was already at the point where they were staying over at each other’s apartments.
If she were being honest, everything in their relationship had happened pretty quickly, but Katsuya had been much sweeter when they first started dating.
But when had things got this bad?
At some point Misa had taken on the chores at Katsuya’s, so she warmed to the idea of moving in together because she was fed up with doing the housework both at her place and his.
That’s right – it didn’t even take a year for him to make me into a perfectly devoted housewife.
It was because she took pleasure in making him happy. But it wasn’t long before he got used to it and eventually took it for granted that she’d keep doing it. Katsuya didn’t even bother tidying up after himself in his own apartment, and he’d let his laundry pile up – he’d blithely call her up to say, ‘Come over, I’m almost out of clean underwear.’
At first, when she’d told him that she wasn’t his housekeeper and that he should do it himself, he had mumbled and nodded in acquiescence, but it wasn’t long before that response from her would elicit a sour mood. The endless arguments had started up around that time too and, caught in a non-stop loop of fighting, Misa gave up and basically just went over to Katsuya’s every week to keep up with the chores.
Out of this exasperation came the search for an apartment.
But then, no matter how hard Misa tried, there would be incidents like what happened today. She hated to admit it to herself – that, despite how hard she tried, her boyfriend showed absolutely no consideration for her.
And on top of that …
I’m not even living with this guy yet and he doesn’t give a second thought to hitting me during a fight. If I move in with him, I’ll have no place to run to get away!
‘I wanna go home.’
Misa stood up from the bench and walked over to a boarding spot on the platform. It would be several minutes until the next train.
Previously, she would have called Katsuya repeatedly and when he didn’t answer, she would have left numerous apologetic messages. It would not have been unusual for her to stand by the ticket gate and wait for him to reappear.
But from this newfound place of detached composure, she was able to question the necessity of clinging to a guy like him. What was more …
My mother would be so sad if she knew that my boyfriend hits me.
This thought had never even crossed her mind before. And now, it made her feel like such an undutiful daughter. It wasn’t only her mother whom she had let down, but her entire family – and her friends too. Everyone would be so sad, if they knew.
It had not taken long for the no-nonsense advice proffered by the old lady as she went on her way to bring Misa to her senses. Even Misa found it odd how quickly she’d been able to relinquish her attachment to Katsuya.
It’d be a few hours before he returned from the racetrack. Misa had a key to his apartment, and that would give her plenty of time to collect her things. Last night had been one of the rare occasions when Katsuya stayed over at her apartment in Obayashi – it would be the last. She would send the few items of his that were at her place to him by delivery service.
Misa knew their breakup would be complicated, but she was prepared for any mudslinging. Luckily, because it was usually Katsuya who summoned her to his place, she hadn’t given him a key. If worst comes to worst, she would call a friend or even the police …