Lady Fitzgerald Browne continued. “He eventually made his way to the continent without drawing undue attention. Now that good King Edward sits upon his throne, I am supposing that he will come back to claim his lands! It will be good to see him again.”
We all heartily agreed with her sentiments, and in her grief about her husband, I was glad to see her looking forward rather than back. Soon, the Lady Elizabeth excused herself, telling the company that she had a headache coming on.
“The babe tires me, as well,” Kate said.
“May I assist you this evening, my lady?” I asked, my voice reflecting that I hoped she would agree. She looked wearily and warily in my direction but nodded her agreement.
Lord Thomas was in his own quarters and had not yet come to join her for the evening so I felt free to speak openly as I took the skirt paneling, undid the laces, and then gathered the rings from her swollen fingers.
“Madam, you know that I love you above all others,” I began. “My loyalty to you is unquestionable. And yet it is the very same love and loyalty that compel me to speak.”
“The garden,” Kate said.
“The garden,” I agreed. “’Tis unseemly.”
Her back stiffened at the rebuke. “It was play, Juliana, nothing more.”
“And in the Lady Elizabeth’s bedchamber? Whilst her governess and maids looked on in horror?”
Kate took the brush from me, set it down, and turned toward me, her face flushing. “I did not begin nor approve of that, and the Lady Elizabeth could have brought her complaints at any time.”
My temper flared and I shook my head. “To whom would she speak in your household, madam? To you? When even now you are unwilling to see. To Lord Thomas? Kat Ashley did speak to him, to no avail. The Lady Elizabeth is too loyal to you to write to the lord protector and bring your household under condemnation. And, as a girl is wont to do, she is flattered at the attention of a man, of course. But at her tender age she does not know better. Lord Thomas most certainly does.”
And so do you. I let the thought float, and I knew she would discern it though it remained unspoken. My own breaths came quickly and sharp as the situation in its entirety somehow reminded me of John Temple, though I knew things had not gone that far. Once more the girl was held to full account for the wrongs of the man.
“I know. You are right. It has grown beyond the playful to something I do not understand.” Kate slouched in a chair. As she did, she ran her hand across her belly. “The little knave grows restless and kicks from within.” Lord Thomas had already told all who would listen that he believed the babe to be a boy.
The flock of ravens, the Lady Elizabeth’s dress clippings, flying to the Tower in my vision came back insistently. Because I had intervened in one forewarned event did not mean all danger had passed. “We must protect the Lady Elizabeth. And yourself. And your son.” I did not mention Thomas. I had no interest in protecting him.
“What shall I do?” she asked quietly.
“You must decrease your household in readiness of your lying in.”
She thought for a moment and then said, “Yes, yes, you are right. As I am to shortly depart for Sudeley to bear the babe, perhaps ’twould be a good time for Kat Ashley to visit with her sister Lady Denny and her household in Hertfordshire.” A shadow lifted from her face. “The Lady Elizabeth will benefit of the fresh air and change of circumstances and I shall be well occupied for the next few months. I’ve also promised Lady Jane Grey she could attend upon me with the household in Sudeley, so mayhap it’s better if Elizabeth does not come just now.”
I nodded my agreement. I knew the Lady Elizabeth’s dismissal would seem to those who knew the situation as if she were to blame, but there was no other alternative. Kate could not dismiss her husband.
Within weeks the queen and Elizabeth had a solemn discussion wherein Elizabeth’s departure was confirmed. Elizabeth said little but perhaps she felt some relief and ease too. Within a fortnight after her departure, the queen received a letter from Elizabeth and she asked me to read it to her whilst she rested upon her bed on a warm afternoon.
“‘Although I could not be plentiful in genuine thanks for the manifold kindnesses received at Your Highness’s hands at my departure, yet I am something to be borne withal, for truly I was replete with sorrow to depart from Your Highness, especially leaving you undoubtful of health. And albeit I answered little I weighed it deeper when you said you would warn me of all evils that you should hear of me; for if Your Grace had not a good opinion of me, you would not have offered friendship to me that way, that all men judge the contrary. Your Highness’s humble daughter, Elizabeth.’”
I closed the paper. “She believes you to be angry with her and hold her accountable,” I said. “She wants reassurance of your love.”
Kate kept her eyes closed. “Nay, I do not hold her to account,” she said softly. “I know whence her fear came. She has my constant love and I shall write and tell her so.”
Within the week we took our leave to Sudeley Castle in Gloucester to prepare for the arrival of the little knave. Thomas did not sail to Scotland with the fleet, as Sir Richard Hibbart had hoped. Instead, he went back and forth between Sudeley and the court, pleading and manipulating in public and private for more power and control.
The very night we arrived in Gloucestershire, I dreamt.
It was a cliff, and next to the cliff, a tiny patch of green upon which grew some flowers. They were bright and bold, flos solis, sunflowers, with beautiful faces that turned toward the sun as it arced across the lustrous blue sky.
Toward the end of its arc, a seed dropped from one flower’s bosom and implanted itself deep within the soil. Within a moment, a tiny shoot sprang forward, unsteady and green. As it began to grow, the larger flower nodded under the heavy weight. Suddenly Lord Thomas’s dagger sliced through the stem right below the head and, thus lopped off, it fell to the ground.
SIXTEEN
Summer and Autumn: Year of Our Lord 1548
Sudeley Castle, Gloucestershire
We arrived at Sudeley in the flush of summer, when the trees in the gardens budded small, hard fruit and the baby birds pulsed insistently as their parents plucked all manner of bug and worm to satiate them. The household that traveled with us numbered more than one hundred and twenty: servants, attendants, maids of honor such as myself, and the usual ladies and gentlemen. All highborn children required a considerable household in attendance from birth, in accordance with their status, and Kate had arranged for a certain Mrs. Marwick to be employed as the babe’s nurse. We spent the summer playing cards, laughing, entertaining our neighbors, and listening to musicians, one by one. It was a season of peace and joy.
Doctor Huicke, who had also accompanied us from London, had instructed Kate to walk often in the gardens in preparation for the birth. None of us dared voice what all of us feared—Kate was, at thirty-six, well beyond the usual age for a first child and the risk of complication to both mother and babe was multiplied.