— And what are we to one another?
Imogen smiles, shaking her head and looking into her bowl.
— Darling. You know there isn’t a word for it in any language.
— I might say there is.
Imogen looks up at Ashley. — Those are words other people give to other things. We’re here because of how we feel, not because we have to be here. Nor because there’s some name for this, strolling in Regent’s Park with a fellow, then running away to Wiltshire—
— Berkshire.
Imogen smiles. — Berkshire. My point is that it’s no good for two people to live together, never knowing whether they come home each night because they care for each other or because they’re bound to be there.
— One has to sleep somewhere.
Imogen kicks his foot under the table.
— Be serious.
— I am serious, Ashley says. One can’t do everything for the grandest reasons. I expect sometimes people do share a bed simply because they’re married. On other days they do it for all the right reasons. Besides, how could one share a life with someone if one never knew whether they’d be around the next moment?
Imogen sets her spoon down on the table and shrugs.
— We never know that anyway. Even if you and I were married, I might be struck dead by lightning. Or exploded by a bomb dropped from a zeppelin. Or you could come home one day and I’d be gone, in spite of all the promises I’d made to God and the law alike—
— You’d do that?
Imogen smiles. — Never. But neither would I marry.
After lunch they go up to their hotel room. They are alone now for the first time and they kiss wildly. Ashley remembers at once the taste of her mouth and her neck, how she felt in Regent’s Park and how she feels now, the scent of her skin against his, her breath warming his cheek. They kiss on until their mouths are tired. Even then they still look at each other in plain wonder, lying clothed in their stocking feet on the bed, Ashley holding her in his arms. He feels mad with fatigue, and in this haze Imogen seems more impossible than ever, more beautiful and more loving than he can fathom. They wake and sleep and wake and sleep until it all seems nearly the same. At times Imogen kisses him as soon as she wakes, before her eyes have opened, as if it is the first instinct in her being, coming before breath even.
Now it is time for Ashley to return home. They get out of bed and he pulls on his tunic, cinching his belt and reknotting his necktie before the mirror. Imogen pulls aside one of the curtains and looks out the window.
— I can’t stay here all day. I need fresh air. Could one hire a bicycle here? I could see the villages—
— There’s nothing to see.
— I adore looking at nothing. You promise to return tonight?
— Nine o’clock at the latest.
— If you’re a minute late, she teases, it’ll be an hour to me.
Ashley kisses her again at the door for a long time and has to pull himself away. He shuts the door behind him and follows the long hallway to the stairs, trying to straighten his shoulders and walk like a soldier. His steps fall softly on the carpet. Imogen Soames-Andersson, he thinks, who waits for me at nine o’clock. The name alone makes him feel crazy.
Back at home Ashley half-dozes through supper with his mother and a wizened aunt. In the parlor afterward the aunt plays Elgar on the piano as Ashley falls dead asleep in an armchair, his glass of Madeira in hand. The glass tips and the dark Madeira soaks his jacket sleeve. Ashley wakes to his mother’s shrieks. Drowsily he removes his jacket and pats it with a napkin. He excuses himself to bed.
In his bedroom Ashley changes into a suit of light flannel and steps out of the first-story window, on his shoulder an old climbing rucksack holding two bottles of champagne taken from the cellar. He feels ridiculous, but it only makes him smile. When he meets Imogen in the hotel lobby, he knows by her expression that she has some new secret to uncurtain.
— I’ve a surprise for tonight, she says. It’s all planned out.
— All I planned for was two bottles of Mumm’s.
— That’s a start.
It is a warm night. They take the motorcar to the fields outside the village where as a boy Ashley had taken long walks alone. It feels strange to be there with anyone else, let alone with Imogen. They park the car and Ashley leads her along the familiar dirt paths, rough lanes made for horse carts, overgrown with weeds through the years. They sit in a dormant field on the driest patch of grass they can find. From the rucksack Ashley takes the champagne and a pair of teacups wrapped in a tablecloth from the kitchen. He had chosen teacups because he supposed they would be less fragile than champagne glasses, but the handle on one of them had broken anyway.
— Now you can’t take it back, Imogen says. They’ll deduce everything from the broken teacup.
— Even you?
— Especially me.
Ashley shakes his head.
— There isn’t a man alive who could deduce you.
— Isn’t there? You came to the concert, didn’t you? You must have deduced something. Or felt something—
Ashley looks away in embarrassment, but Imogen smiles, running her hand through his hair.
— Darling. What color would you say your hair is?
— Reddish brown? Auburn?
— Nothing so prosaic. Let’s say a dark Venetian blond. Like a Renaissance courtesan, but more sinister. Too beautiful for a young man—
She laughs. — My darling courtesan. Are you ready for the surprise?
— Certainly.
— Back to the motor, then. We’re going to church.
A CLUE
I sleep on the floor of the new house on a pile of blankets and pillows, Christian snoring beside me late into the morning. As soon as I get up I go to my backpack in the hallway and take out the green tin. I pull off the lid and feel the stiff paper of the envelopes, the thin hard twine binding the bundles together.
In the dining room Karin is setting the table for breakfast, moving slowly as she sips from a cup of coffee.
— We’re the only ones up, she says. And my head is killing me. How are you?
— Not too bad. I drank a lot of water before I went to bed.
— I should have done that. How late were you up? You never came to the lake—
— I found something. Let me show you.
I go to the hallway and come back with the tin of letters. Karin looks up at me, her eyes wide. She unties one of the bundles and leafs through the envelopes, shaking her head.
— Where’d you find this?
— Upstairs, in one of the boxes in the bedrooms.
Karin removes a sheet from its envelope.
— And in English, she murmurs. I had no idea there was stuff like this in there. I’ll have to tell my uncle—
She studies the letter for a moment.
— This is from one of your relatives?
— I think so.
She shakes her head. — I’m sorry, but you can’t take them, not now anyway. I have to show them to my family. My father will probably want to see them too.
— Do you mind if I copy them?
— Of course not. But there’s no copy machine here.
— That’s OK. I’ll do it by hand.
As the others bask in the sun along the lakeshore, I sit at the dining table in the new house, slowly transcribing letter after letter. It’s harder than I thought. Some of the letters are so difficult to read that I leave out whole lines. Others are so engrossing that I stop copying and set down my pen.