"Got it," said Linda tiredly, "Look, I realize that you can destroy me, but that doesn't mean that I have to like you if I don't feel like it. Because I don't like you at all. I think you're quite evil."
"Oh, come on, Linda," said Rosemary, walking up to her slowly.
"Please don't touch me," said Linda between clenched teeth. "If I don't ever see you again I won't cry. I'd just like for you to leave me alone."
"All right, be like that," said Rosemary, stopping a few feet in front of Linda. "It's just that I want you to know one thing."
"What's that?" asked Linda with a mocking interest. "I'm dying to know."
"I just want you to know that I did what I did not just for me and certainly not for Jack. I also did it for you. Yes, you."
"That's garbage."
"No it's not."
"Yes, it is. You have no regard for my feelings what so ever. Goddam you. You really hurt me."
"I didn't mean to. Listen to me, Linda. You may feel badly now, but when you think back on what's happened, you're going to thank me."
"I'm sure."
"I'm sure too. You're going to be lying there in bed with that husband and wish that you could have something more than what you've got. You'll see."
"Please let me out now," came her reply.
"Sure thing," said Rosemary, quickly unlocking the deadbolt. In a flash, as soon as the door opened, Linda ran out, then turned around and said, "I hate your guts." Then she ran to her car and drove away.
CHAPTER FOUR
Linda raced home. She knew Steve would already be there. You could always count on good ol' Steve. Her mind was in an uproar during the few minutes it took to get back to her house as she wondered what in the world she ought to do about this mess with Jack and Rosemary O'Neill, those lousy stinking perverts.
There was not much she could do, she kept thinking. Were she to tell Steve, he'd go out of his mind. So then he'd call the cope and the O'Neill's would find out and fix their wagon as they both had threatened to do. No, she couldn't tell Steve. But she'd have to tell him something.
She decided as she pulled into her driveway that she'd tell him basically the truth, but not quite all of it. She'd just say that Rosemary O'Neill, the wife of the principal, had called her up just before be came home – which was true – and asked her to come over just for a friendly get-acquainted meeting for a few minutes. If it bothered Steve, he could check it out and, if anyone had seen her, she'd have her story pretty well substantiated.
Steve seemed a little annoyed when she walked in the front door. He was watching the evening news and didn't even get up to kiss her. "Hi," was all he said before turning.
"Hi, yourself," she said, forcing a big grin. She slid in next to him on the couch and cuddled up close. There was hardly any response. Geez, she thought briefly some response I'm getting after all I've been through.
She blew lightly into his ear and whispered, "It's so nice to see you, baby. I'm sorry I wasn't here when you came home tonight."
"Why weren't you?" asked Steve, who was making no effort to hide his annoyance.
Why, you bastard, she thought. Christ, I could be dead and I don't get any kind of tenderness. Oh well, better say something quick.
"The wife of the principal called me up just about 34 minutes ago and asked me to come by to get acquainted with her. I felt like I couldn't really turn her down, Steve. You know I've got to make a good impression."
"Why didn't you leave me a note, baby?" asked Steve, softening a bit. "I was worried sick about you. I thought you might have been in an accident or someone might have grabbed you and raped you or something crazy like that."
Now she turned up the charm full blast and rubbed her torso and breasts into his side. "You're right baby," she cooed. "I'm sorry I didn't."
Steve chuckled. "Oh, you're so nice, babe. I'm sorry if I sounded mean to you just now."
"That's OK," said Linda, not sure if he actually meant it or not. Well, there was no point in dwelling on it, she told herself. "What would you like to drink, honey. How about a martini?"
So they had drinks and dinner and Linda tried hard to enjoy herself. But she somehow felt as if something had changed, that something would be forever and irretrievably changed and that there was not a thing in the world she could do about it. And so it was hard to keep happy. It was the same kind of feeling she had her wedding night, when she had given up her virginity – gratefully and willingly, of course, but with a sense of sadness and loss of having left a part of her life behind, with no chance of ever coming back.
She thought it would have been nice to have had some love making that night, but Linda was one of those people who has to be in the absolute right mood to make love. Steve had always understood that. It never really bothered him, so it seemed, to Linda, and that was one of the many reasons she loved him.
As she tried to go to sleep, she found her mind racing all over the place. There was nothing she could place her finger on, just that she wondered and worried about everything. Would everyone at school be able to tell that the weirdos, Jack and Rosemary O'Neill, had worked her over? She remembered her girlfriend in college, Gina Townsend, telling her that once a girl made love to a boy, you just bad to look in her face to tell that things were now incredibly different with her. What happened, she now wondered, if you had been with a lesbian? But I'm not a lesbian, her mind screamed. Finally, she made it to sleep, just by praying continually for the better part of an hour. "Forgive me please, Lord," she thought while clenching her hands together. "I did not know what I was doing. You know that I couldn't help it."
She felt just plain tired in the morning and not in much of a mood for any cuddling, hugging or kissing that next morning, even though Steve was doing his beat together in a romantic mood by stroking her in the most tempting places. She almost gave in, but the guilt from the previous day and the desire to be at school on time overrode any animal impulses she might have given in to. Still, it was kind of a nice way to start the day, she told herself, getting into the most demure outfit she could find. The last thing she needed today was to have horny little high school boys lusting after her and undressing her with their eyes every time she made even the slightest move anywhere.
"Sex and drugs and rock and roll" was the first thing Linda saw when she got to school that day. Someone had painted that in 8-foot high letters on the side of the administration building. For some reason, such desecrations of school property didn't really bother Linda much. The kids, for the most part, didn't seem especially bothered, at least not nearly as much as the faculty and administrators were that day. Good, she thought. At least I won't get hassled again by Jack O'Neill. That's all I'd need.
O'Neill came over the school loudspeaker and threatened that that night's football game would be cancelled if whoever was responsible for the vandalism didn't turn himself in. But he later relented when some janitors traced the paint to the cars of a few of the long haired hippies in the school. The culprits had their names read over the loudspeaker during the middle of third period and Linda could see the football players in her class relax a bit. She wouldn't have normally cared, but tonight she was assigned to help provide security at the game by taking tickets and keeping an eye on the kids with Steve, but she would have much rather just spent the night at home with Steve.
As a matter of fact, there was dancing in the hallways during the break. Cheerleaders were leading cheers:
We are the Wolves
And no one could be prouder
And if you don't believe us
We'll yell a little louder
We are the Wolves…
Linda had to smile. This kind of unleashing of youthful enthusiasm was wonderful; how much better for the kids to be doing that instead of messing around with drugs or having sex with each other. She'd never even kissed a boy until she'd gotten to college and she felt that she was a much better person for it.