As sanity returned to him, Barry edged his body off his wife and rolled over.
Kim, almost asleep, kissed him lightly on the cheek, curled herself up in a child-like fetus position. He put the covers over her, and for a moment before sleep overtook him, Barry thought of her tenderly. In spite of her few Victorian hang-ups about oral sex, she was still pretty good in bed, he had to admit. As good as most women he’d had. He stared at Kim, trying to imagine her as a strange woman he had just finished fucking, fucking for the sake of fucking and not out of love. Like Lynn, for example, that beautiful creature belonging to Jack Goren, that sensual, enticing all-woman. My God, he could just see her in bed, hungrily sucking his cock, naked and wild with prurience and desire, making love for its own-licentious sake. No… no, why was he thinking like this. What would it accomplish? Besides, he could almost imagine the hurt Kim would feel if she knew of his lewd thoughts… and the outrage it would cause the Gorens, for that matter. He groaned and turned over, shutting off the bedside lamp and plunging the room into darkness.
Kim woke him with a sweet, tender kiss the next morning. He slowly opened his eyes and looked up at his wife, who held a bathrobe around her, and then he smiled, stretched his arms and yawned.
“Morning, honey,” she said. “Want some coffee?”
Barry nodded, turned over and put his face to the pillow. “MMmmmmm,” he murmured in a sleep-filled voice. Kim, by moving up from the bed, let the sunlight from the open window stream across his body, warming it beneath the covers. He dozed again until she reappeared.
“You overslept, baby,” she said. “It’s nearly nine.”
Barry suddenly sprang awake. “What?”
“If you plan to get any writing done, you’d better start pretty soon. You know what Saturdays are like around here. I should have called you, but I lost track of the time myself.”
Barry gulped some of the coffee she had brought, then jumped out of bed, all thought of resting there gone. He hurriedly dressed, walked out to the kitchen where Kim was scrambling some eggs. He sat at the dinette and watched her lithe young form as she moved gracefully around in the flower-design bathrobe. Her bare legs were still tanned from the summer sun, and they were beautiful enough to not need stockings, he thought; even her small feet, not normally a beautiful or appealing part of anybody’s anatomy, were cute to him. He ate the eggs and toast when she served them, and even talked a little. Usually conversation was a matter of grunts in the morning, neither of them very good at being friendly after just rising, but the coffee helped this morning, as well as the lovemaking of the night before. Sex was all important to a marriage; they both agreed to that. Again, he had another momentary flash of imagining Jack Goren’s wife in the bed with him, and not his wife, but Barry quickly dispelled the idea from his mind as totally unthinkable.
Writing was impossible. Barry retired to the study, rolled a fresh sheet of yellow foolscap into the IBM electric typewriter, and stared at the keys. No bursts of inspiration came to him. He reread the few pages he had so laboriously salvaged from the previous week’s efforts, made a face as he read them, and then looked back at the virgin sheet. At this rate, he was going to collect social security when he finished the novel, he thought disgustedly; and with a rush of anger, he tore the sheet from the machine, balled it up and threw it into the overflowing wastepaper basket.
Somebody started to cut his lawn down the block, and the gas engine of the mower made a tremendous racket. The man across the street added to the disturbance by starting up a power saw to cut down the limbs of an old oak tree in his front yard. Barry remembered the noise from two days previous when the neighbor had started the project. He finished his coffee morosely and walked out to the kitchen for a fresh cup. He waited, knowing full well he was procrastinating, as he heated the pot on the stove.
Kim had dressed in a pair of black stretch pants and a white frilly blouse. The blouse was sheer enough to see through, and her bra molded her breasts like mountain peaks through fog. She was in the laundry room, sorting the clothes for washing. Barry knew that at twelve she was going to start the washing machine.
“Must you?” he said out loud.
“What?” Kim, not knowing to what he was referring, looked up, startled. “You mean the washing? No, baby, I don’t. Of course we won’t have any clean clothes next week.” Barry realized he had snapped at her for no good reason. “I’m sorry, honey, I’m just upset. First I’m late getting started today, and now all the racket…“ He sighed and drank some coffee. “I’ve got to get away some place.”
“I know,” Kim sympathized.
“Up to Tahoe or down to Aptos or some place where I can go just like it was an office and I had a regular job. That’s what I need: a ritual, a regular schedule like I had at the Sentinel.”
Kim had heard it all before, but she nodded in agreement, knowing full well how futile the idea was with their meager savings. As she turned back to her chore with the clothes, she thought about the week’s food, and how to cut down on the cost a little more. Hamburger instead of roast beef, hot dogs and casseroles and no deserts…
Barry went back to the study, but for all his efforts, he wasn’t able to write anything even approximately worth saving by noon. The washing machine went on as promised, and with a muffled, frustrated curse, Barry threw in the towel and gave up for the day.
“Going well?” Kim asked when he appeared, knowing the answer even before he said it.
“Like hell,” he grumbled. He opened a beer and sat down in front of the television set to watch an old movie, disgruntled.
At one, the phone rang. Kim answered it in the kitchen, and then called to Barry. He walked in and took the receiver; to his surprise, Jack Goren identified himself.
“Hello, Barry, how are you?” Goren asked.
“Fine. Say, this is a surprise.”
“Well, it was really nice talking together the way we did last night, and so I thought I’d call and tell you so.”
“Thanks. Both Kim and I enjoyed it, too. You were a lifesaver.”
Goren laughed heartily. “Same here. Say, how’s the writing coming? Did I interrupt you?”
“No, no, there were enough distractions to make me give it up an hour ago.”
“That is a shame, Barry.”
“Well, I’m just going to have to learn to cope with it, I guess.”
“Maybe not. That’s another reason I called. Lynn and I came up with an idea.”
“Really?”
“We have a cabin at Salmon Creek on the Sonoma County coast. It’s not very posh, but it has a heater and electricity and running water, and you’re welcome to use it if you want.”
Barry was pleasantly agape. “Well, Jack, that’s very kind of you to offer…“
“Nonsense. Lynn and I don’t use it much any more, and we’d like to have somebody up there. It’s probably pretty damned musty, and could use some living in, so you’d be doing us a favor as much as we’d be helping you. Should have thought of it last night. What do you say? I won’t take. no for an answer!“
“In that case… why, yes, I’ll be glad to, Jack.”
“Fine! Great!” Goren said something to his wife about Barry accepting the offer, then there were muffled sounds and he came back on. “Say, Lynn had a fine idea, Barry. She has some free time this afternoon, so if you want to use the cabin immediately she’ll meet you up there. Around four, if that’s all right. She’ll turn on the gas and the electricity, show you where things are and give you the keys.”
“Sounds good,” Barry said. “Let me talk to Kim. Just a sec.” He quickly told his wife of their sudden good fortune, the Gorens’ generous offer. His excitement was obvious. “What do you think, honey?” he asked her.
“I think it’s marvelous,” Kim said. Her voice was eager for him.
“Do you want to come along?”
She smiled ruefully. “Wouldn’t you get more writing done if I didn’t?”