That's understandable, but you could at least see him.
He hasn't called me. Maybe he has someone else.
Or maybe he's busy, or writing, or he's afraid to intrude since you made such a fuss about your relationship with Brandon. Maybe you owe it to him to at least tell him it's over. That might be something. But Allegra was playing a waiting game, and she wanted to see if he called her.
And as it turned out, he did, on Friday. He called late in the afternoon, and he sounded tentative when he asked for her, as though he wasn't sure he should be calling her in the office. Alice told her he was on, and Allegra took a deep breath and picked up the phone, but her hand was shaking. She felt as though the rest of her life had just begun the moment she heard him.
Allegra?
Hi, Jeff. How are you?
Better now. I know I said I wouldn't call for a while, but you've been driving me up the wall. I figured I had to, and then I'd leave you alone again for a while. I really miss you. They were the words she had sweated two years for with Brandon, and with Jeff it was all so easy. He sounded wonderful, and she felt guilty for not calling him, as Dr. Green had suggested.
I miss you too, she said softly.
How are all your kids now that you're back? Everyone behaving? Or are you fighting off death threats and crazies and paparazzi at four in the morning?
It's been a quiet week, actually. Except in her own life, but she didn't say that. What about you? How's the screenplay coming?
Miserably. I haven't felt like working since I've been back. I think you distracted me severely. There was a moment's pause, and then he asked her something he'd wondered since he left New York. How was your weekend?
It was interesting, she said coolly. We'll have to talk about it sometime. But she didn't want to discuss it in the office.
That sounds like a date in the very distant future, he said sadly. He had waited all week to call her, and she sounded so good to him now. He was dying to see her.
I don't think it is, she said quietly. She tried to force herself to be brave and remember Dr. Green's words. What are you doing this weekend? She held her breath and waited. Oh, God, don't let him be like the others’ .
Is that an invitation? He sounded stunned. What had she done with Brandon? But he was afraid to ask her and spoil the moment.
It could be. I'm having dinner with friends in Malibu tomorrow night. Do you want to come? Very informal, in blue jeans and old sweatshirts. We may even go bowling.
I'd love it. He sounded thrilled. He couldn't believe she had asked him. Can I ask who the friends are, just out of curiosity, so I don't make a fool of myself when we get there? He knew the kind of people she hung out with, and he was right.
Alan Carr and Carmen Connors, but you can't tell anyone you saw them together. They're hiding out in Malibu, to get away from the tabloids.
I'll be sure to keep it a secret, he said, laughing. There was no one in the world who would ask him. That sounds like quite an evening.
It won't be, she said happily. They're both lousy cooks, but good people. With any luck, they'll buy take-out pasta. I'll suggest it. Carmen hasn't learned to cook yet, and Alan's teaching her. It could be pretty awful. She laughed, happy just talking to him, and they chatted for a while about what the week had been like without each other.
Were things all right for you when you got back? he asked her obliquely, and she said they were. But she knew what he was asking her. He wanted to know about Brandon, but it seemed so awkward to tell him on the phone. She really didn't want to. It would be easier to tell him on Saturday, before they went to Alan's.
They talked for a few more minutes, and then they hung up, and she thought about him constantly for the rest of the evening. She had planned to go to her parents' for dinner that night, until she found out they were going out, and she went home and made scrambled eggs for herself, and thought about Jeff, and Brandon. She didn't want to make the same mistake again. She didn't want to believe that someone was what they weren't.
And she was very quiet when Jeff arrived at her house on Saturday, looking immaculate in faded, pressed blue jeans, a crisp white shirt, and a blazer. He still looked very Eastern, and she loved it. He looked like a Ralph Lauren ad. And she was wearing white jeans and a white shirt, and a red sweater over her shoulders.
She felt shy with him at first, and he looked around, admiring her house. It was like starting all over again, until he pulled her slowly into his arms and kissed her.
That's better, he said softly. I've waited a long time for this, he whispered.
Nine days, she whispered back, and he shook his head in answer.
Thirty-four years. I've waited a long time for you, Miss Allegra Steinberg.
What took you so long? she asked as he folded her into his arms, and they sat on the couch together, admiring the view. She was totally at ease with him again, as though she'd never left him.
I don't want to be rude, he finally said cautiously, as she went to get him a Diet Coke in the kitchen, and he followed her, and looked around, admiring what she had done. But there was no sign of Brandon. Where is he?
Who? She looked puzzled as she poured his drink. They were meeting Alan and Carmen in Malibu, not at her house.
Brandon. My rival. He was curious as to what had happened and why she was available on a Saturday night. She had offered no explanation whatsoever on the phone. Maybe he was in San Francisco. Is he away?
Permanently. She smiled mischievously at him, looking like a naughty kid who's done something she shouldn't. He's gone. I guess I forgot to tell you. He stood staring at her, and then set his drink down on the granite counter.
Wait a minute. He's gone ‘ out of the picture ‘ adios ‘ and you didn't tell me? I don't believe it. You little shit! He grabbed her again, and squeezed her tight in his arms. How dare you do that to me! I've been trying to figure it out since yesterday when I called you, and you asked me to dinner. Why didn't you call me? I thought that was our deal, you'd call me if anything happened.
A lot did happen when I got back, but I needed some time to sort it out in my own mind, before I called you. He understood that, but he had agonized over her all week. He would have loved to have known that she had broken up with Brandon. And now he had a thousand questions he wanted to ask her.
What dastardly deed do I have to thank him for, if I ever see him?
Apparently quite a few I didn't know about. But the real topper was when I flew to San Francisco and showed up at the Fairmont last Friday night. That was a good one. He had a woman with him, staying in his room. And suddenly I realized that he's been doing it all along, and he pretty much confirmed that.
Nice guy. Great principles. I like that in a man. Good moral fiber. He was joking with her, but he was seething inside at what she'd been through. How humiliating, and how cruel. But in an awful way, he was glad it had happened, and so quickly. It was kismet.
The trouble is, she commented, I like all those nice things too, principles, ethics, fidelity, all that boring stuff that's out of fashion these days. And I seem to like to delude myself about people I convince myself have them. Unfortunately, I'm wrong usually. I seem to miss the call most of the time. In fact, so far, when it comes to picking losers, I've been batting a thousand.
Maybe things have finally changed for you, he said, pulling her close to him again, as he stood behind her, and felt her willowy warmth against him. Maybe your eyesight has gotten better.
Has it? She asked him cautiously, wanting answers from him, and reassurance.
What do you think?
I'm asking you. I don't think I could go through that again. This is the third one for me. Three strikes, I'm out.
No, Allegra, he said, turning her around to face him so he could look at her. You're just beginning. You're only a baby. That was all practice stuff. Now we go for the brass ring. And you're gonna get it this time ‘ you deserve it’ . Her eyes filled with tears as she looked at him, and this time when he kissed her, she kissed him back, with all her heart, and the faith that she had given so foolishly before. But he was right. This one was the biggie. He was the genuine article, and he wasn't going to fool her. To her very core, she knew it.