Mr. Demise shrugged and stepped backward — and suddenly he was gone! He had disappeared into thin air, soundlessly, instantaneously.
“Why what?” Reggie said blandly. He started to sip his drink when suddenly the full realization of what had happened burst on him. The drink fell from his nerveless fingers with a crash.
He stared frantically about the room.
Mr. Demise was gone! It was incredible! It was unbelievable! But it was a fact!
He poured himself another drink and drained it in one breathless gulp. He felt his reason tottering as his gaze swung desperately about the room.
“Mr. Demise!” he cried. “Come back! Where are you!”
“I am here before you,” Mr. Demise’s voice sounded in the air. “Are you convinced now?”
Reggie mopped his forehead weakly.
“Yes,” he gasped. “I’m convinced.”
Mr. Demise reappeared as suddenly as he had vanished. He smiled faintly at Reggie. He was apparently completely unruffled by his transformation.
Reggie poured himself another drink with trembling fingers.
“D-don’t do that any more,” he pleaded.
“As you wish,” Mr. Demise said agreeably. “I am sorry if I shocked you. I can see now that it was a mistake to let you see me in the first place. I understand now why it is strictly forbidden.”
Reggie drained his drink.
“I wish you hadn’t decided to break regulations,” he said moodily. “I’ve never been so upset in all my life. Why didn’t you remain invisible, if you’re supposed to? You aren’t going to creep into people’s hearts if you pop up and announce yourself as an agent of Death and start making speeches about whisking them off to the Land of Darkness. People just don’t like that sort of thing. By all means stay invisible in the future.”
Mr. Demise shuffled awkwardly and for the first time his poise seemed deserting him.
“You’re absolutely right,” he said gloomily. “But I was curious.”
“That’s a fine excuse,” Reggie said scathingly. “I should think they’d get a man of tact and diplomacy for your job. Not some nosy person whose curiosity runs away with him.”
“You see,” Mr. Demise explained miserably, “you happened to be my first assignment. I’ve had no experience at all in this work and I was curious to see what kind of person I was going to take back with me. And I wanted to get a first-hand reaction from you.”
Reggie mixed himself another drink. He was beginning to feel belligerent.
“So?” he cried. “They sent an amateur down to get me, did they? I suppose I don’t rate an experienced escort. So they sent you. I’m surprised they didn’t just tell the office boy to do the job.”
“Your levity is poor taste,” Mr. Demise observed frigidly. “I can assure you that I am perfectly qualified to act as your guide to the Other World. I have studied hard to perfect myself for my work and I was considered one of the outstanding pupils in the class which just graduated. You do not have to relieve your spite by making slighting references to my professional ability.”
“Bah!” Reggie said. “If you have any professional ability it hasn’t been noticeable so far. You’re just out of some college, aren’t you? You talk like a college boy. You don’t make sense.”
Mr. Demise looked hurt.
“I’m sorry you’re taking this attitude,” he said. “I had hoped we could be friends.”
“Friends!” Reggie shrieked. “Am I expected to be friendly with some ghoul who comes prowling around threatening to whisk me off to Eternity? What more do they expect of me? To pay my own way too, I suppose.”
“Your passage will be taken care of at the other end,” Mr. Demise said. “Since you have taken such an ungracious stand we will not dally further.”
“Now wait a minute,” Reggie said. He felt his throat getting dry. The prospects of Death were not pleasant. He didn’t want to die right now. He had things to do. There was that badminton match next week with Snuffy Smith...
“Can’t we put this thing off a while?” he asked hopefully. “There’s no sense in rushing things, I always say. Why don’t you go off and get yourself a lot of experience and then come back for me?”
“That is impossible,” Mr. Demise said flatly. He drew from his inside coat pocket a slim black book which he opened to the first page. “You are first on my list and I must carry out my orders to the letter. All the information as to person, place and method is contained in this book and it would be impossible to change it.”
“Place and method, eh?” Reggie said weakly. He ran a finger around the inside of his collar. “You mean you’ve got the dope there on how it’s going to happen and when it’s going to happen?”
“Certainly,” Mr. Demise replied. “We don’t use a hit-or-miss method. Everything is worked out to a science. You, for instance, are—” Mr. Demise paused and shook his head. “No,” he continued, “I can’t tell you. That is also against instructions.”
“You haven’t paid much attention to instructions so far,” Reggie said sulkily. “Can’t you give me a hint as to how I’m going to get it?”
Mr. Demise shook his head firmly.
“That would be an unthinkable breach of conduct,” he said, shaking his head severely and frowning. “Absolutely unthinkable.”
“All right,” Reggie said resignedly. There was no point, he realized, in arguing with this inhuman icicle. “But let’s have a drink before we get down to — er — business.”
“I am not allowed to drink while on duty,” Mr. Demise said primly.
“For gosh sakes,” Reggie said disgustedly, “you weren’t thinking about your precious orders and regulations when you followed me around, scaring the hell out of me. Oh no! That was all right. But when I ask you to do a little something outside the letter of your instructions it’s no soap. If there’s anything fair in that I can’t see it.”
Mr. Demise shuffled uncomfortably.
“It was indiscreet of me to allow you to see me,” he said thoughtfully. “Perhaps your objection is justifiable. It might square things a bit if I would take a drink with you. Not that I would expect to enjoy the stuff but it seems the fair thing to do.”
“Fine,” Reggie said.
He mixed two drinks in somber silence. Because he realized that it was probably the last time he would ever perform that pleasant chore, he put his heart and soul into the task and when he finally handed Mr. Demise his drink it was a veritable masterpiece.
Mr. Demise drank the drink — it was a double Martini with a splash of Quantro — in one long appreciative gulp. He set the glass down and sighed contentedly.
“Another?” Reggie suggested hopefully.
“No,” Mr. Demise said, “one is plenty. As a matter of fact,” he said, “that’s the first drink I ever had. Alcohol is one of our finest helpers but we aren’t supposed to touch it. Personally I think its intoxicating effect is greatly overrated.”
Reggie leaned forward and there was a peculiar gleam in his eyes.
“So that was your first drink, eh?” he asked. “And you don’t feel anything?”
“Not a thing,” said Mr. Demise. “Of course I notice a certain glow, but that’s all.”
“Just a certain glow, eh?” Reggie said.
“Thash all,” Mr. Demise said. He sat down suddenly. “And my tongue ish a lil’ thick.”
“Well, that’s only natural,” Reggie said. He mixed another drink and there was a cryptic smile on his lips. “Alcohol is a peculiar thing. One drink will addle a person’s wits and the second will act as an antidote. Strange, isn’t it?”
Mr. Demise rocked slightly in the chair. His coal-black eyes were a bit glazed. “Ish very strange,” he conceded.