Time to move.
We walked slower and more quietly, each shadow the tip of an hour, warning us we were nearly there.
The earth turned cooler. The hum grew louder as the windmills encompassed us and barred us in. The looming silhouette of the outer wall of the Superiors’ compound stood intimidating us with its plainness. Joseph and I took a step forward. The others were still. I turned and whispered “Goodbye,” squeezing their hands and kissing their cheeks.
Rash shoved his hands in his pockets. “Whatever, Soar. I’ll see you soon,” he said, turning away from me.
Pelo gave me a look of devastation, of pride and fear. He didn’t speak, just followed Rash, stringing his arm over Rash’s shoulders as they walked away. I laughed as Rash dipped and wiggled out of the embrace.
Matthew’s hand lingered. “Be careful,” he said, knowing it was inadequate, but what else could he say?
Being careful would be to turn around and walk away from this. We gave them our handhelds. I took one last look at Orry’s location. It was so far from here. I sighed in relief and aching.
We stepped forward, disconnecting from our companions. Our toes tipped the haunting, anti-gleam of the straight-edged line of the Wall’s shadow. We stepped over it and into greyness.
The others melted into the trees. The barest rustle the only evidence there had ever been more than two of us, the great shushing of wind turbines absorbing their footsteps. They would wait for us at the meeting point for three days. If we failed to get there in time, they were going to carry out the less sophisticated, second part of our plan—blow up the targets set out by the Spiders. Factories, research centers, and other places whose destruction would cripple the Superiors’ operations. Then, as a parting gift, they would blow a hole in the outer walls. I prayed I would be there to see it and see them again.
I cursed as we moved tentatively away from them. It was like having my towel ripped from me after I’d stepped out of the shower. My security, my safety, gone.
*****
It had seemed like a good idea but, standing next to Joseph, our hearts drumming and shaking the ground like an earthquake, I was starting to waver. I stomped my foot and pushed my doubts into the ground. This was the right thing to do. It was the only thing we could do.
We removed our coats and jumpers, leaving them in a green pile on the sodden ground. Our white shirts, flapped hollowly over our frightened bodies. We wore our flags of surrender.
Joseph’s hand found my waist, and he pulled me into a rushed, tight embrace. His voice shook a little as he said, “I love you.”
I stood on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his, letting that calm, gold sea lap and wash over me for one more second before we threw ourselves into the flames. His mouth crushed mine, and the sea erupted into choppy, fling-you-from-your-boat kind of waters. I pulled back for breath and grinned at him through the sharp, blue afternoon. His hands still gripped my waist, his strong fingers digging into my hipbones.
I dropped my eyes to the smudgy ground, feeling words pushing their way up from deep inside my rattling chest. “Joseph, I need to say something to you before…” I couldn’t quite finish. I didn’t know what came after before.
He curled a strong finger under my chin and lifted my face to his. “What is it?” he asked, his eyes blinking slowly, revealing that glow, that forest of green and gold.
I bit my lip and mumbled, “Thank you.”
He raised his eyebrows and searched my eyes, waiting for the rest. I thought about all the times he had lifted me up, saved me, loved me. And the times when I crossed my arms over my body and kept him out. He never gave up. I couldn’t say I regretted how it happened; it was part of what made us strong now. I had to learn how to trust him. He had to learn to be patient with me. But now I felt like I was meeting him at the same level. I placed my hand on his broad chest and let his warmth sink into to me. I sighed softly, letting the scared, pregnant teenager separate from my shadow and blow away. “Thank you for loving me when I didn’t deserve it.”
He dipped his chin so our noses were almost touching, deep breaths pulsing out from his body. “Rosa, not that you always made it easy, but you need to know something. You,” he pointed one strong finger at my heart and tapped it on the hard bone of my sternum once, “were never undeserving of love.” He kissed me gently on the forehead, sliding his hands down my arms and creating a shiver.
I tried unsuccessfully to squeeze the tears back in. “Ok.” I smiled grimly, no teeth, just my lips pressed together because the moment couldn’t last, even though I wanted it to. “You ready?” I asked, half-hoping he’d say, ‘Nah forget it, let’s go home to Orry.’
He chuckled softly. “Nope, but we promised, right?”
We held hands and made our way to the closest checkpoint, rounding the ever-curving wall.
*****
By the time we reached the first surveillance point, the sun was casting horizontal lines of light over the wall. I shook my head. Even with the beginning of the brilliant golds and pinks of sunset, it still looked like it was made of windowsill dust and crushed bones.
Joseph put his hand to his brow and scanned the top of the wall.
“I don’t see anyone, do you?”
My eyes tracked the top of the wall, searching for the top of a hat, a head, but there was nothing. I bent down to scoop up some rocks to throw over and get someone’s attention. Joseph stood, legs parted, staring up at the sky. I rose next to him and turned to give him a handful.
Like a spot of blood, a pre-emptive color of what was to come, a bright red light wobbled in the center of Joseph’s chest. He took a deep breath in, still scanning, not noticing the infrared kill mark.
I slid gently in front of him and put my hands in the air. I could almost feel the red light burning a hole in my forehead. Joseph had no time to react, but he carefully raised his hands too.
“Don’t shoot!” I shouted to the black gun poking over the top of the wall. It slowly rose, and the hands and face attached to it revealed themselves. A red-haired, freckled face with makeup lazily smeared over the cheeks appeared, his blue eyes frightened and hesitant, but his finger ready to pull the trigger.
“We represent the Survivors, and we have a message for Superior Este,” Joseph said loudly, trying to sound confident but coming off a little desperate.
The boy with the gun pulled back a little. I could see him weighing up whether to trust Joseph’s words or not. He thought about it, and then quickly re-trained the red light on my chest. The light wriggling and wobbling like a firefly scared to be bottled. I could feel Joseph stiffen behind me. His body wanted to react and get me out of danger. Then we’d both be dead.
I grabbed his wrists behind me, digging my nails in, forcing him to stay still. I found the young man’s eyes and stared into them. “We know why the babies are getting sick,” I shouted, watching my words sail up and slap the young soldier in the face.
His eyebrows moved down, framing his eyes like apostrophes. “Don’t move,” his quivering voice demanded. He turned his head and shouted down towards someone on the ground inside. “We need retrieval near scorch spot nine.”
Joseph took a step sideways and the boy’s eyes flicked up, a ping sounding out as hot metal whizzed through the air and landed deep in the ground at our feet. “I said, don’t move!” he screamed, his voice borderline hysterical.
We both nodded and stayed frozen in the mud, our eyes dancing frantically in our heads.
*****
Salim’s description of wide, sweeping gates with foreboding sculptures climbing the spires didn’t exist anymore, at least not at this end of the circle. I expected we’d be going through the wall or, if we had to, we would have climbed over it. Not under. Salim never mentioned this. It must have been new. Or some of the information in that weird man’s head had come loose and fallen out of his ear like sand.