“Yep, me and Mom, all night long.”
Felix looked up and gave me the raised-eyebrow thing. I blushed, ducking my head down.
“Oh. Okay, ” Dana replied. “Oh, hey, listen. The reason I was calling is I just got some totally good news from my agent this morning.”
“Oh yeah?” I said, only too glad to change the subject. “Do tell.”
“Okay, drumroll please. Ta-daaaaa, ” she said, drawing out the suspense. “Guess who is the one and only Mia Carletto’s new stand-in on Magnolia Lane?”
I froze. “No.”
“Yes! Can you believe it? How lucky am I?”
“Lucky? You do realize that the last person to hold this job is dead, right?”
Dana waved me off with a pft sound between her teeth. “Oh, come on, Maddie, what are the chances of that happening twice?”
I refrained from pointing out that it already had-with Dusty.
“I’m going to be a permanent member of the cast of Magnolia Lane. Like, how totally cool is that?”
Considering that the last person to fill this role had wound up strangled with a pair of support hose, cool wasn’t exactly the word I’d choose.
“Dana, please don’t do it.”
“What? Why not?”
I bit my lip. “What about the letter Mia got yesterday? This guy isn’t giving up. And if Mia really is the target, and he tries again…well, I just don’t want you in the way.”
“Don’t worry, Maddie, there’s, like, tons of security there now.”
Right. Which hadn’t helped Dusty at all. “Dana, I don’t think this is a good idea.”
“The AD said I might even be able to speak a line now and then. A line, Maddie! You know how much SAG base pay for one line on Magnolia Lane is?”
“Dana, I know this might be a good career move, but-”
“Good? It’s the best thing that’s happened to me since I got that walk-on part in the Brad Pitt movie. I’ll be a permanent member of the cast, Maddie. This is huge!”
So was the feeling of dread slowly building up in the pit of my stomach. “Dana, please-”
“Holy crap! Is it really seven o’clock? Wow, I’ve got to go.” She stifled another yawn. “Gotta be on set by eight. They can’t start blocking scenes without a stand-in. Wish me luck, Mads!”
“Dana, wait!” I called into the receiver. But she was already gone.
I stared at my cell, my heart racing, my stomach churning. Probably Dana would be fine. Probably I was overreacting. Probably the police presence on set was huge, and whoever the killer was, he wouldn’t be able to get within ten feet of Dana.
Probably.
“So, I’m your mother now?” Felix asked, folding his paper.
“What? Oh, sorry. I had to tell her something.”
“And you didn’t want to tell her you came begging at my doorstep in the dead of night?”
“I wasn’t begging.” Much. “And ten o’clock is hardly the dead of night.”
Felix shrugged. “Hey, that’s okay. If you want to keep our torrid affair a secret from your friends, be my guest.”
I opened my mouth to protest (it was an accident!), when I saw the teasing twinkle in Felix’s blue eyes.
“Jerk.”
“Sticks and stones, love. Sticks and stones.”
Felix downed the rest of his coffee. “I’ve got to go check in with my editor. There are clean towels in the guest bath, ” he called over his shoulder as he sauntered out of the room.
I swirled the dregs of coffee in my cup, that ball of dread still sitting like a lead weight in my stomach. By taking the stand-in job, my best friend had just effectively labeled herself killer bait. If someone was really intent on going after Mia, that meant anyone close to her was in harm’s way. It wasn’t like this guy was picky; he’d already gotten rid of two innocent victims. I paused. Well, okay, maybe if Veronika had been blackmailing someone, she wasn’t entirely innocent, but I was pretty sure she didn’t deserve death by control tops.
Any way you looked at it, Dana was throwing herself right into the thick of it.
Alone.
I set my cup down on the counter. Right next to Felix’s keys and wallet. The wallet was leather and looked expensive. The keys were attached to a ring that had a ninety-nine-cent plastic fish dangling from it. Total Felix.
I reached out and slid one finger down the soft leather siding of the wallet. Hmm…I wondered…
With a quick glance over my shoulder, I flicked it open. Yep, right there, stuck into the billfold, was Felix’s press pass. His golden ticket that could get him in just about anywhere.
Even the Magnolia Lane set.
I bit my lip. I glanced over my shoulder again. I could faintly hear Felix on the phone with his editor, arguing about word count and column placement.
I took a deep breath, then hopped off the stool, grabbing my purse with one hand and Felix’s wallet and keys with the other.
That was it. He was so never letting me sleep over again.
My hands were shaking as I stuck the keys in Felix’s battered Dodge Neon. I turned the ignition, wincing at the loud sound erupting though the quiet morning. I glanced at the front door, expecting to see an irate Felix come running from it any second. Nothing. I quickly backed out and pulled down the street, my eyes glued to the rearview mirror. Nothing. I did a small sigh of relief. Maddie: 1. Tabloid Boy: 0.
I know, I was a terrible person for stealing Felix’s car, especially after he made me cappuccino and let me stay over. I consoled my guilty conscience by telling myself I’d make it up to him, that I’d feed him the exclusive of the century once I made sure Dana was safe.
And, by the time I came down out of the Hills, I had formed the beginnings of a plan to do just that. To not only get Dana out of harm’s way, but to get a killer behind bars, as well. Step number one was to get inside the studios.
While I hadn’t officially been fired as wardrobe assistant, I had a feeling that after the whole carrying-a-gun-onto-studio-property thing, my name was on Bug-eyed Billy’s “do not allow entry” list. (Not to mention the fact that if Ramirez caught me on set he’d likely throw me in the back of a squad car faster than you could say “purple Prada pumps”.) Luckily, I knew for a fact that Felix’s name was on Billy’s list. All I had to do was convince Bug-eyed Billy and Queen Latifah that I was not the crazy blonde with the habit of setting off their metal detector, but a crack tabloid journalist with the L.A. Informer. Which meant I needed to change my look, and I needed it quick.
There was only one person I knew who carried a virtual wardrobe around in his trunk, not to mention a fully stocked makeup kit. I floored the accelerator as I pointed my stolen car in the direction of Fernando’s.
“Maddie, dahling!” Marco dropped the fishing net he was draping over the reception desk and attacked me with air kisses as I walked through the doors of the salon.
Followed closely by Pablo’s greeting. “Squawk! Oops, I did it again. Squawk!”
Marco shot the bird a dirty look. “No Britney. That’s the rule. I told you, no Britney.”
I’m not sure, but I thought I saw the bird spit in Marco’s direction.
I tippy-toed over to his desk, doing a pseudo-whisper. “Is Mom here?”
Marco shook his head. “Nope. Your mama isn’t due until three, when she has a bikini wax scheduled for Mrs. R.”
I shuddered. “And Ralph?”
“Fernando, ” Marco chided, “is doing a cut and color for Mrs. Lohan.” He leaned in close. “Lind-say’s mom.”
I nodded, looking to the back of the salon, where I saw Faux Dad running his scissors through the wet locks of a slim, forty-something blonde.