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This example provides an indication of the more important social functions of the mobile phone. I've written about this issue at great length elsewhere20, but it is worth explaining briefly here. The mobile phone has, I believe, become the modern equivalent of the garden fence or village green. The space-age technology of mobile phones has allowed us to return to the more natural and humane communication patterns of preindustrial society, when we lived in small, stable communities, and enjoyed frequent 'grooming talk' with a tightly integrated social network of family and friends. In the fast-paced modern world, we had become severely restricted in both the quantity and quality of communication with our social network. Most of us no longer enjoy the cosiness of a gossip over the garden fence. We may not even know our neighbours' names, and communication is often limited to a brief, slightly embarrassed nod, if that. Families and friends are scattered, and even if our relatives or friends live nearby, we are often too busy or too tired to visit. We are constantly on the move, spending much of our time commuting to and from work either among strangers on trains and buses, or alone and isolated in our cars. These factors are particularly problematic for the English, as we tend to be more reserved and socially inhibited than other cultures; we do not talk to strangers, or make friends quickly and easily.

Landline telephones allowed us to communicate, but not in the sort of frequent, easy, spontaneous, casual style that would have characterised the small communities for which we are adapted by evolution, and in which most of us lived in pre-industrial times. Mobile phones - particularly the ability to send short, frequent, cheap text messages - restore our sense of connection and community, and provide an antidote to the pressures and alienation of modern urban life. They are a kind of 'social lifeline' in a fragmented and isolating world.

Think about a typical, brief 'village-green' conversation: 'Hi, how're you doing?' 'Fine, just off to the shops - oh, how's your Mum?' 'Much better, thanks' 'Oh, good, give her my love - see you later'. If you take most of the vowels out of the village-green conversation, and scramble the rest of the letters into 'text-message dialect' (HOW R U? C U L8ER), to me it sounds uncannily like a typical SMS or text exchange: not much is said - a friendly greeting, maybe a scrap of news - but a personal connection is made, people are reminded that they are not alone. Until the advent of mobile text messaging, many of us were having to live without this kind of small but psychologically and socially very important form of communication.

But this new form of communication requires a new set of unspoken rules, and the negotiations over the formation of these rules are currently causing a certain amount of tension and conflict - particularly the issue of whether mobile text is an appropriate medium for certain types of conversation. Chatting someone up, flirting by text is accepted, even encouraged, but some women complain that men use texting as a way of avoiding talking. 'Dumping' someone by text-message is widely regarded as cowardly and absolutely unacceptable, but this rule has not yet become firmly established enough to prevent some people from ending relationships in this manner.

I'm hoping to get some funding to do a proper study on mobile-phone etiquette, monitoring all these emerging rules as they mature and become unwritten laws, so perhaps I will be able to provide up-dated information on the rule-forming process and the state of the negotiations in future editions of Watching the English. For now, I hope that identifying more general, stable 'rules of Englishness' or 'defining characteristics' will help us to predict, to some extent at least, the most likely future developments in this process.

To discover these defining characteristics, we first need to examine the rules of a much more stable, established form of English communication: pub-talk.

20. See Fox, K. (2001) 'Evolution, Alienation and Gossip: the role of mobile telecommunications in the 21st century' (This was a research report commissioned by British Telecom, also published on the SIRC website - www.sirc.org It's a lot less pompous than the title makes it sound.)

PUB-TALK

The pub is a central part of English life and culture. That may sound like a standard guidebooky thing to say, but I really mean it: the importance of the pub in English culture cannot be over-emphasized. Over three-quarters of the adult population go to pubs, and over a third are 'regulars', visiting the pub at least once a week. For many it is a second home. It also provides the perfect 'representative sample' of the English population for any social scientist, as pubs are frequented by people of all ages, all social classes, all education-levels and every conceivable occupation. It would be impossible even to attempt to understand Englishness without spending a lot of time in pubs, and it would almost be possible to achieve a good understanding of Englishness without ever leaving the pub.

I say 'almost' because the pub - like all drinking-places, in all cultures - is a special environment, with its own rules and social dynamics. My colleagues at SIRC and I have conducted quite extensive cross-cultural research on drinking-places21 (well, someone had to do it) which showed that drinking is, in all societies, essentially a social activity, and that most cultures have specific, designated environments for communal drinking. Our research revealed three significant cross-cultural similarities or 'constants' regarding such drinking-places:

1. In all cultures, the drinking-place is a special environment, a separate social world with its own customs and values

2. Drinking-places tend to be socially integrative, egalitarian environments, or at least environments in which status distinctions are based on different criteria from those operating in the outside world

3. The primary function of drinking-places is the facilitation of social bonding

So, although the pub is very much part of English culture, it also has its own 'social micro-climate'22. Like all drinking-places, it is in some respects a 'liminal' zone, an equivocal, marginal, borderline state, in which one finds a degree of 'cultural remission' - a structured, temporary relaxation or suspension of normal social controls (also known as 'legitimised deviance' or 'time-out behaviour'). It is partly because of this caveat that an examination of the rules of English pub-talk should tell us a lot about Englishness.

THE RULES OF ENGLISH PUB-TALK

The Sociability Rule

For a start, the first rule of English pub-talk tells us why pubs are such a vital part of our culture. This is the sociability rule: the bar counter of the pub is one of the very few places in England where it is socially acceptable to strike up a conversation with a complete stranger. At the bar counter, normal rules of privacy and reserve are suspended, we are granted temporary 'remission' from our conventional social inhibitions, and friendly conversation with strangers is considered entirely appropriate and normal behaviour.

Foreign visitors often find it hard to come to terms with the fact that there is no waiter service in English pubs. Indeed, one of the most poignant sights of the English summer (or the funniest, depending on your sense of humour) is the group of thirsty tourists sitting patiently at a pub table, waiting for someone to come and take their order.

My first, callously scientific, response to this sight was to take out my stopwatch and start timing how long it would take tourists of different nationalities to realise that there was no waiter service. (For the record, the fastest time - two minutes, twenty-four seconds - was achieved by a sharp-eyed American couple; the slowest - forty-five minutes, thirteen seconds - was a group of young Italians, although to be fair, they were engrossed in an animated debate about football and did not appear much concerned about the apparent lack of service. A French couple marched out of the pub, muttering bitterly about the poor service and les Anglais in general, after a twenty-four-minute wait.) Once I had obtained sufficient data, however, I became more sympathetic, eventually to the point of writing a little paperback book on pub etiquette for tourists. The field research for this book - a sort of nine-month nationwide pub-crawl - also provided much useful material on Englishness.