"Quiet," Maury said, as the Stanton rang the doorbell.
The front door opened and there stood my father in his trousers, slippers, and the new bathrobe I had given him at Christmas. He was quite an imposing figure, and the Edwin M. Stanton, which had started on its little speech, halted and shifted gears.
"Sir," it finally said, "I have the privilege of knowing your boy Louis."
"Oh yes," my father said. "He's down in Santa Monica right now."
The Edwin M. Stanton did not seem to know what Santa Monica was, and it stood there at a loss. Beside me in the Jaguar, Maury swore with exasperation, but it struck me funny, the simulacrum standing there like some new, no-good salesman, unable to think up anything at all to say and so standing mute.
But it was impressive, the two old gentlemen standing there facing each other, the Stanton with its split white beard, its old-style garments, my father looking not much newer. The meeting of the patriarchs, I thought. Like in the synagogue.
My father at last said to it, "Won't you step inside?" He held the door open, and the thing passed on inside and out of sight; the door shut, leaving the porch lit up and empty.
"How about that," I said to Maury.
We followed after it. The door being unlocked, we went on inside.
There in the living room sat the Stanton, in the middle of the sofa, its hands on its knees, discoursing with my dad, while Chester and my mother went on watching the TV.
"Dad," I said, "you're wasting your time talking to that thing. You know what it is? A machine Maury threw together in his basement for six bucks."
Both my father and the Edwin M. Stanton paused and glanced at me.
"This nice old man?" my father said, and he got an angry, righteous expression; his brows knitted and he said loudly, "Remember, Louis, that man is a frail reed, the most feeble thing in nature, but goddamn it, mein Sohn, a thinking reed. The entire universe doesn't have to arm itself against him; a drop of water can kill him." Pointing his finger at me excitedly, my dad roared on, "But if the entire universe were to crush him, you know what? You know what I say? Man would still be more noble!" He pounded on the arm of his chair for emphasis. "You know why, mein Kind? Because he knows that he dies and I'll tell you something else; he's got the advantage over the god-damn universe because it doesn't know a thing of what's going on. And," my dad concluded, calming down a little, "all our dignity consists in just that. I mean, man's little and can't fill time and space, but he sure can make use of the brain God gave him. Like what you call this 'thing,' here. This is no thing. This is _ein Mensch_, a man. Say, I have to tell you a joke." He launched, then, into a joke half in Yiddish, half in English.
When it was over we all smiled, although it seemed to me that the Edwin M. Stanton's was somewhat formal, even forced.
Trying to think back to what I had read about Stanton, I recalled that he was considered a pretty harsh guy, both during the Civil War and the Reconstruction afterward, especially when he tangled with Andrew Johnson and tried to get him impeached. He probably did not appreciate my dad's humanitarian-type joke because he got the same stuff from Lincoln all day long during his job. But there was no way to stop my dad anyhow; his own father had been a Spinoza scholar, well known, and although my dad never went beyond the seventh grade himself he had read all sorts of books and documents and corresponded with literary persons throughout the world.
"I'm sorry, Jerome," Maury said to my dad, when there was a pause, "but I'm telling you the truth." Crossing to the Edwin M. Stanton, he reached down and fiddled with it behind the ear.
"Glop," the Stanton said, and then became rigid, as lifeless as a window-store dummy; the light in its eyes expired, its arms paused and stiffened. It was graphic, and I glanced to see how my dad was taking it. Even Chester and my mom looked up from the TV a moment. It really made one pause and consider. If there hadn't been philosophy in the air already that night, this would have started it; we all became solemn. My dad even got up and walked over to inspect the thing firsthand.
"Oy gewalt." He shook his head.
"I could turn it back on," Maury offered.
"_Nein, das geht mir nicht_." My dad returned to his easy chair, made himself comfortable, and then asked in a resigned, sober voice, "Well, how did the sales at Vallejo go, boys?" As we got ready to answer he brought out an Anthony & Cleopatra cigar, unwrapped it and lit up. It's a fine-quality Havana-filler cigar, with a green outer wrapper, and the odor filled the living room immediately. "Sell lots of organs and AMADEUS GLUCK spinets?" He chuckled.
"Jerome," Maury said, "the spinets sold like lemmings, but not one organ moved."
My father frowned.
"We've been involved in a high-level confab on this topic," Maury said, "with certain facts emerging. The Rosen electronic organ--"
"Wait," my dad said. "Not so fast, Maurice. On this side of the Iron Curtain the Rosen organ has no peer." He produced from the coffee table one of those masonite boards on which we have mounted resistors, solar batteries, transistors, wiring and the like, for display. "This demonstrates the workings of the Rosen true electronic organ," he began. "This is the rapid delay circuit, and--"
"Jerome, I know how the organ works. Allow me to make my point."
"Go ahead." My dad put aside the masonite board, but before Maury could speak, he went on, "But if you expect us to abandon the mainstay of our livelihood simply because salesmanship--and I say this knowingly, not without direct experience of my own--when and because salesmanship has deteriorated, and there isn't the will to sell--"
Maury broke in, "Jerome, listen. I'm suggesting expansion."
My dad cocked an eyebrow.
"Now, you Rosens can go on making all the electronic organs you want," Maury said, "but I know they're going to diminish in sales volume all the time, unique and terrific as they are. What we need is something which is really new; because after all, Hammerstein makes those mood organs and they've gone over good, they've got that market sewed up airtight, so there's no use our trying that. So here it is, my idea."
Reaching up, my father turned on his hearing aid.
"Thank you, Jerome," Maury said. "This Edwin M. Stanton electronic simulacrum. It's as good as if Stanton had been alive here tonight discussing topics with us. What a sales idea that is, for educational purposes, like in the schools. But that's nothing; I had that in mind at first, but here's the authentic deal. Listen. We propose to President Mendoza in our nation's Capitol that we abolish war and substitute for it a ten-year-spaced-apart centennial of the U.S. Civil War, and what we do is, the Rosen factory supplies all the participants, simulacra--that's the plural, it's a Latin type word--of _everybody_. Lincoln, Stanton, Jeff Davis, Robert E. Lee, Longstreet, and around three million simple ones as soldiers we keep in stock all the time. And we have the battles fought with the participants really killed, these made-to-order simulacra blown to bits, instead of just a grade-B movie type business like a bunch of college kids doing Shakespeare. Do you get my point? You see the scope of this?"
We were all silent. Yes, I thought, there is scope to it.
"We could be as big as General Dynamics in five years," Maury added.
My father eyed him, smoking his A & C. "I don't know, Maurice. I don't know." He shook his head.
"Why not? Tell me, Jerome, what's wrong with it?"
"The times have carried you away, perhaps," my father said in a slow voice tinged with weariness. He sighed. "Or am I getting old?"