At one point, Rosalyn expressed her condolences for the loss of her father. “I see you are still in mourning. Do you mind me asking what he was like?”
“He was a very good man. Intelligent and kind. Very witty. I am deeply indebted to him for passing on to me the love of reading. He spent a good deal of the day reading and encouraged me to do likewise. We would often sit in his study discussing one of his books or dissecting a favourite poem.” Elizabeth sighed as she felt her eyes tear up. “I do miss him very much.”
Rosalyn reached out, taking her hand. “He sounds like a wonderful father. What do you miss most about him?”
Elizabeth pondered this for a moment. “The way he instilled in me a desire to improve myself and learn all I could. We were without a governess, you see, but I had such a desire to learn. I am quite certain it came from my father.” She took in a shaky breath. “My favourite pastime spent with him was playing chess. Of the five daughters, I was the only one who enjoyed the strategy of the game and could best him on occasion.”
“You play chess?”
“Yes, but it has been a long time since I have played.”
“Unfortunately, none of us here play, although my brother, Simon, plays well. He tried to teach me on several occasions, but I simply could not remember how each piece moved. It would be much easier if each piece moved only one direction!”
“But then it would merely be draughts[1],” Elizabeth said with a soft chuckle.
They both laughed and went on to discuss a myriad of other things.
Elizabeth lost all sense of time as she, Mrs. Willstone, and Miss Matthews spent a good part of the afternoon conversing. Other than her visits with the Gardiners and Jane, Elizabeth could not recall having spent a more enjoyable afternoon in quite a long time.
Elizabeth occasionally glanced toward Mrs. Willstone, who seemed pleased that she and her sister were getting on so well. She was grateful that Mrs. Willstone and Miss Matthews, both from wealthy, prominent families, did not look down on her due to her current station in life. That she had gone from a landed gentleman’s daughter to have to seek employment as a governess did nothing to lower her in their eyes. The rigid line that separated governesses from their employers seemed to be overlooked by them.
For the remainder of that first week, Rosalyn often accompanied Elizabeth as she gave lessons to Emily and worked with her on her manners, singing, and piano playing. Rosalyn enjoyed the friendship that was developing between her and Elizabeth, and as she also took great pleasure in spending time with her niece, she was quite pleased to be able to do both at the same time.
Elizabeth customarily adjourned to her chambers after Emily was settled in bed, feeling strongly that her employment as governess did not allow for her to enjoy the comforts and privileges of the home. Therefore, she rarely visited with the Willstones in the evenings. But shortly after Rosalyn’s arrival—with fervent invitations from Rosalyn and consensus from Mrs. Willstone—Elizabeth remained with the adults in the evening and visited. The ladies would continue whatever conversations had been struck up during the day. They proceeded to cover every topic of interest imaginable.
Rosalyn gave Elizabeth what she missed most in not having Jane around every day: someone with whom to converse. They challenged each other and encouraged one another, and although their conversations did not take the place of her talks with Jane, Elizabeth found Rosalyn to be almost as amiable.
That following Sunday, when Elizabeth spent the afternoon with the Gardiners and Jane, they noticed immediately the glow in Elizabeth’s eyes and the warmth in her cheeks. For the first time since her father’s death, she had come to the Gardiners in good spirits, and for that they were grateful. She did not come ravenous for good company and conversation, as she had fed on it all week. Instead, she arrived with contentment and an eagerness to share stories with her family about her new friend.
Elizabeth had never pined for any of the social privileges that those in the first circles enjoyed, but she took great delight in hearing Rosalyn talk about all the engagements she enjoyed over the years whenever she spent time in London. As Rosalyn described the balls to which she had been invited, the concerts and theatre plays she had attended, and the presentations at Court, Elizabeth delighted in the enchanting way she described them. She could not help but feel just a small bit of envy as she wished that perhaps just once she would like to step into Rosalyn’s world and experience it for herself.
“Oh, Elizabeth! The music just fills your ears as hundreds of dancing couples bow and curtsey, swirl and promenade down the endless ballrooms in luxurious gowns!” Rosalyn’s eyes lit up as she described the balls in Town, which, although similar to ones that Elizabeth attended in the country, were on a much grander, more prestigious scale.
“And all the fine gentlemen! Oh, sometimes I can barely breathe when one asks for my hand!”
Elizabeth smiled, fully cognizant of the fact that she would never receive an invitation to such a ball or to dance with such gentlemen, being in the position in which she now found herself. She closed her eyes, allowing herself to dream, as Rosalyn finished her narrative.
At length, Rosalyn softened her voice and her light blue eyes widened.
“Elizabeth, do you think a gentleman would find me attractive?”
Elizabeth looked at her and tilted her head and narrowed her eyes, teasing her with her scrutiny.
“Please, Elizabeth! I am serious!”
“I think any man would find you a most handsome young lady!”
“You do not say that merely to appease me?”
“Rosalyn, you have beautiful blue eyes, a fine nose, nicely shaped lips, and a tall, slender figure,” Elizabeth assured her. “You have a charming personality and I know that you must certainly turn many a man’s head.”
“Please do not think me silly, Elizabeth, it is just that sometimes I wonder why…” She took in a deep breath and pursed her lips.
“Rosalyn? What is it you wonder?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “It is just that he never looks my way.”
Elizabeth’s eyes widened. “He?” she asked teasingly. “Who is he?”
Rosalyn gave her head a firm shake. “Oh, I could never tell!”
“Pray, Rosalyn! Why?”
“He is far above me, above our family. He would never take a second look at me.”
“Rosalyn, your family is much esteemed. Why would you say that?”
“To own the truth, Elizabeth, my father married beneath him. My mother had no noticeable connections, and growing up, I felt the disdain of many families who were of more refined and well-bred society.”
“Oh, Rosalyn, certainly you must be mistaken.”
“Whether or not I am mistaken, this gentleman has never acknowledged me, and if Lorraine knew that I continued to pine for him, she would scold me ruthlessly!”
Elizabeth laughed. “Pine for him? Can you not tell me more? Now I am dying with curiosity.”
“I will only say that he is a man who lived near my family when I was growing up. The first time I ever saw him, I just knew he was the one I wished to marry! But I could never tell you his name!”
Elizabeth laughed softly and leaned in toward Rosalyn. “And you still pine for him?”
She nodded her head slowly. “My whole family knew of my infatuation with him when I was younger, and they laughed and thought me young and silly. Now that I am older…”
“Your feelings are unchanged.”
“Yes,” she said as she nodded her head.
“If you cannot tell me his name, you must tell me everything else about this man!”